Would you send your kids to private school if money were no option?

[Beetroot]

and if so why? or why not?

Mine go to a private school. I justyfy it tom myslef becase they are specialist musicanans, they have 'special needs' which would not be fufilled in the state sector (round 'ere anyway)

Was totally against it though, until I fell into it by mistake!

Hana - I think lots of people work extremely hard and don't get very far!

I think that's why I wouldn't claim hard work got me where it did- it was hard work and shed loads of good luck!

i need a bit of your luck over here please!

Yes, I'd definately choose a private school but we cant really afford it right now - hopefully both of my children will benefit from private secondary schooling. In Bournemouth there are not really any good alternatives - most schools are single-sex and I dont want that, the only mixed secondary school is a complete dump, I did a bit of Supply teaching there and wouldnt NEVER send my children there.

As we cant afford the fees right now we have chosen the bext primary in the borough which happens to be a CofE (dh is an athiest!), it has very good results and lots of generous parents to provide extra funds.

hi Hana, how are you?

just wnat to say- I think this whole private vs state-school thing here in de UK is absurd- my cousin whe's mum got benefits went to the smae school as the dutch princes.
BUT my children didn't do well/were really unhappy in state school here in de UK, (classes of 35! too much especially whem learning english as a second language- no support offered at school).
So, the system is unfair but I'm lucky enough to be able to pay it for my children- as i'm lucky enough to buy them food and there are people in this world who can't afford to buy food for tehir children- not for that reason any of you would not buy the best food possible for your child.
So far private school has proven to be much , much better for my children, for all sorts of reasons.

I don't want to. But I am very aware that I didn't want DD1 going to the closest school nearest to us (she would have gone there, however, had a place at the school just round the next corner not come through); I do think that I might, if I had felt very unhappy with the nearest option, move to be nearer a good state school. Having said which, DD1's school is packed with parents who would never be able to afford private education, so I don't think it's the same as (it could, arguably, be an equivalent to) the mix at a private school. And I'm very very happy with where she is at the moment.

In six years' time I may feel I have to put her in for various scholarship exams. If she's very bright I may feel 'oh, why not give those exams a go', and then be faced with a Decision. But actually I very much would like to stay within the state system for a lot of reasons.

I think LIZS makes a good point about 'what is priviliged?'(sp?). I am certainly not form a priveliged background, nor is dp but he's done really well for himslef so we can affored the besy School in this area for dd.
Also what exactly does the phrase 'hothoused' mean?
Makes them sound like feckin tomatoes!

I went to an independent school from 4-18 and loved it. Most of my friends who I'm stilll in touch with joined at secondary and said the difference b/w their state education and the move to independent was huge.

Ds and dd will attend our local state primary. There are 17 pupils in total so no worries about class sizes!

As for secondary - although our local state school is the best in the county the exam results (50% A-C passes) are not a patch on my former school (97% A-C passes) which is still one of if not the best in Scotland. We can't afford it at present, but if either ds or dd are able I would consider appyling for a bursary or live in a shed.

In principle, I would prefer not to send my kids to a private school, but if they had particular needs which would only be met in the private sector, I might. Also, the secondary school my dd will go to is excellent (non-selective, all girls, faith school). However, all the co-ed or all boys secondary schools in this area are streets behind in terms of results. So if money was no object (but sadly it is) I would probably consider sending ds to a private school in order to give him the same chances as dd.

Meant to add - maybe the system in England is different, but in my experience, the independent schools in Scotland are incredibly selective - usually academic entrance test under exam conditions,IQ test plus interviews with the prospective pupils and parents.

So even if money was no object, there would be absoulutely no guarantee that my two would be bright enough to gain a place at a private school.

That would be my only qualm - that we would get as far as the entrance test but no further

So, it mostly boils down to where people live... no change there then.

Dd will be going to a private pre-prep from Septemebr, she is currently at the nursery there.

Our reasons are small class sizes, a caring disciplined environment, a wide varied curriculum with lots of extra curricular activities such as music and drama, before and after school care and the freedom to move away from the restraints of SATS and the National Curriculum.

Goodness knows how we will afford it when ds goes there too. We have already started to economise. No holidays, takeaways, meals out,make things last as long as possible etc.

NO!

DD1 went to great Infants & Junior schools and did really well. She now goes to one of the worst secondary schools in the country which has a high proportion of children from one of the most deprived areas in the country. She loves it, dh & I are happy because she's happy, and she has actually improved at a faster rate than at her previous school.

They have just been inspected by OfSTED, so I'm waiting to see the report. Their last inspection said that attainment was below average, and, teaching was good.

However, ds may go to one of the other state secondaries in the city, as he is a completely different kettle of fish to dd1.

chose not to send dd to private school as we wanted her to have the social advantage of living inthe same neighbourhood as her school friends.She is 14 now and has a lovely social life and so much independence ,all her friends are within walking distance.This would not have been the case if we had chosen private school.

However if the local state school was crap I wouldn't hesitate.

If it were easily affordable then yes. I would not hesitate. Since I have two dd?s there is nothing I?d like more than to cosset my 2 little girls in a delightful little countrified girls school, where I could be more sure they?d flourish academically and grow emotionally confident.

As it happens, we could afford a private school. A highly sought after, academically selective, co-ed school where DH teaches. We?d get subsidised fees.

However, I?m choosing a state primary over this particular private school for a variety of reasons:

• Social status. Whilst DH is just a teacher, feel DD?s ought not to be immersed in an environment full of the children of Accountants, IT managers, businessmen, Naval Commanders, Surgeons etc? It would expose DD?s to our financial differences too young in their lives. I don?t want them to feel like lesser people at age 5 because we don?t have a flash house/car/holidays.

• Private school may be too academic. Whilst I?m confident my children wouldn?t struggle, I don?t want them to feel pressure at that age.

• Proximity. The State school is 5 minutes walk away. The private school would entail a tiring 25 minute car journey. DDs? future friends should live in our village.

• The site. The private school is inner city. The site is lacking space and green play areas. The Pre-prep shares the same site as the senior school and the dining hall and overlapping playgrounds would be a scary place for my girls with those 6ft tall 6 formers looming over them!

We're lucky that we have a good enough State Primary School near to us.

I WILL most likely take advantage of the Private sector for Senior School. By that time, the school has a greater social mix with appx. 40% coming from State junior schools.

I hope DH will be working in a different Independent school by that time because I?d still be bothered by some aspects of his current school.

• Boy/girl ratio is 2:1. It used to be boys only and is still seen as the boys school.

• Inner city. It?s in a rough city and the Private school pupils stand out in their distinctive uniforms making them easy targets for bullying/taunting/mugging even.

• Site. No green spaces. Pupils have to travel off-site for most of its sporting activities

*Class sizes. It?s a popular school and the school have increased its numbers. The class sizes aren?t as small as some parents believe.

• Teaching. Private doesn?t necessarily mean better teachers. Some schools put higher academic qualifications above aptitude for teaching. But, ALL schools will have some bad teachers.

6 formers = 6th formers

btslight,

I was interested to read your reasons for not choosing the private school where your dh is 'just' a teacher. The children at this school may well have parents who are surgeons, high-powered businessmen etc but I just wanted to point out that this isn't the case at every private school. My dh and I, also 'just' teachers, are choosing a private school and I'm always amazed by how many other teachers (and v. often from the state sector) choose this option too. I think it's very sad but also very revealing.

Including on this site. Put your hands up all you teachers who send/ are going to send your kids to private school.

Agree springintheair. I know of many state school teachers sending their children to private school, for many different reasons.

That's good Batters. It's just that btslight was saying that she didn't want her dd to go to a particular private school because she didn't want her to be an odd one out in terms of money or social status which all the other parents seemed to have more of than she did. I wanted to point out that parents of cleaners, bus drivers etc do send their children to private school too. And lots and lots of teachers and I'm afraid the fact that teachers send their kids to private school does matter, not to the kids at the school, but because it could be seen as an indictment on the state system.

springintheair ~ Lots of teachers do send their children to DH's private school. But, the majority of the primary school children are from very privileged backgrounds. I'm sure our car wouldn't be the scruffiest in the carpark nor our house the smallest.... but I'm sure we'd come somewhere near the bottom (at this particular school)

At the senior school level there is a huge variation and lots of parents who are making sacrafices to send their children private, so, it would not be so noticable.

Maybe I'm worried about me feeling inferior to some of the other parents too.

No I wouldn't. Not necessarily because of the money (although we couldn't afford it), but because of the message it would send to my children - "You are getting a better chance of success than X down the road because we can afford it and they can't". I don't want my children to think that their success in life comes because they paid for it.

I believe in equality of opportunity, and I know that's easy for me to say because we are surrounded by good state schools. But I really believe that even if my local schools were crap, I would send my kids there and try as a parent to do my bit to make them better. If all educated, middle class and motivated parents practised their academic version of 'white flight' away from comunity schools then they will remain crap. That's not to say uneducated, working class parents don't want the same for their children - but in many cases they don't have the wherewithal to do something about it.

Unless we all try to make our local schools as good as we can then they will all level down, not level up.

A lot of parents say they won't 'sacrifice their child to their principles' - but what are the point of principles if you don't stand by them?

I don't care who provides the education - state, private, whoever, as long as all children have the opportunity to benefit, not just those with well-off parents.

That's not to say I don't agree with streaming etc - I do, but as long as you start off from a level playing field.

Don't mean to equate 'uneducated' with 'working class' in my last post, by the way. Just trying to make a comparison between 'stereotypes'.