Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Education

Join the discussion on our Education forum.

Original poster

Would you send your kids to private school if money were no option?

277 replies

Beetroot · 04/02/2006 20:04

and if so why? or why not?

Mine go to a private school. I justyfy it tom myslef becase they are specialist musicanans, they have 'special needs' which would not be fufilled in the state sector (round 'ere anyway)

Was totally against it though, until I fell into it by mistake!

OP posts:
geekgrrl · 05/02/2006 11:44

but I'm not making it up - I went to private school.

ScummyMummy · 05/02/2006 11:59

Batters! Of course you wouldn't be shot! That's what I was trying to say, badly, below. That revolution is not for me because i would have to shoot almost everyone I like - practically no one I know and love agrees with me. It is vastly important to me that my mates and their kids are happy and I am delighted that dd is loving her new school. Honestly. I am shamelessly able to divorce my theoretical views from what people i like choose in practice. Didn't even feel cross with Dianne Abbott- I know the feeling that you'd do anything for your kids. I would do anything for mine- just that i still have faith in the state system for the moment, is all.

Which points to me having a different strokes for different folks policy in theory as well as practice and the only problem with that is I do think the system is divisive. I profoundly disagree that all or even most private school kids are hothoused and stuck up etc but clearly the vast majority of children at private schools can attend only beacuse their parents are relatively wealthy and therefore they will not routinely rub up against children whose parents are poorer. I think this absolutely perpetuates deep divisions in our society.

But at the same time I don't think anyone would choose to send their children to a school that they don't think is good. That just wouldn't make sense- everyone wants the best for their children and rightly so.

LIZS · 05/02/2006 12:02

Agree - our kids' classmates come from a variety of backgrounds. However do feel "privileged" to have the choice but equally others may use this privilege of choice to buy an expensive house near a great state school or in a selective area.

ScummyMummy · 05/02/2006 12:04

And, obv, I don't really approve of shooting... Very squeamish, me. Oh, and it is even wronger than private schools. Theoretically and practically. And I don't have a gun.

Cam · 05/02/2006 12:10

Custy can you please send me your latest email address?

I won't join in with this thread as everyone knows where I'm coming from by now

But, am very interested in meetup with you and Scummy to discuss the comparitive merits of LLCoolJ and Usher over a couple of drinks

Original poster
Beetroot · 05/02/2006 12:14

gekgirls description ay be true of her privae school but not all. Certaily no the one my kids goto. Yes some are very rich (very few) but most of ordinary, have second hand uniform often, both parents working in order to afford fees, we have kids with dsiabilities, the kids arenot all super bright.

OP posts:
Hulababy · 05/02/2006 12:14

Not saying you are making it up geekgrrl. That is obviously what your school was like, and those you know. Just saying that my experience (and that of the people we know who go/have gone) is not the same as yours.

Rianna · 05/02/2006 12:15

o yes, for years I've kept them at state schools but now we've made the move to private : i would have done this much earlier, even if it would have menat financiel sacrifices.

Cam · 05/02/2006 12:26

.....and anyway all schools will be private one day or sposored by business because the govt can't afford to fund education properly........

SueW · 05/02/2006 12:29

So true cam. And education won't be available to all because someone will have taken the decision that some kids will only be allowed to take vocatinal stuff - already local schools are only allowing some children to take the practical options whilst those who are more academically able are only allowed to take academic subjects regardless of what their future ambitions may be.

paolosgirl · 05/02/2006 12:58

Not sure. I think they get more opportunities for extra-curricular 'stuff', and the facilities are probably better. I'd like to think that you probably get more kids from backgrounds where education is important, and so there will be more support for the school.

That said, I loathe the old boys network that exist in the Edinburgh private schools, and I haven't seen much evidence that private schools provide a much higher standard of education than the better state schools. I went to one of the top state schools in Scotland, and knew many kids who (for some reason) went to the nearby private school. None of them are in careers that are any better than my ex-school friends. I also feel that the days (inc travel) are too long for kids, and that you are taking them our of the local community.

fullmoonfiend · 05/02/2006 13:03

Not for primary but deffo for secondary. Round here my local comp is dire and the nearest other is so heavily oversubscribed they have a 1 mile catchment area strictly enforced. House prices in that 1 mile are - obviously - totally prohibitive. My ds is 8 and i am already losing sleep over what to do

octavia · 05/02/2006 13:15

Blossomhill, your dd unit isn't anywhere near Bucks/berkshire is it. To be honest things are far from perfect but at least he's happy, has friends and is getting an education.

fisil · 05/02/2006 13:24

No absolutely not.

It is something I feel so strongly about that I know that I must parp on it. And I also know that it is a very strong personal feeling (and luckily dp's too), so I tend to try to keep out of conversations about it, because I know that everyone will make a decision which is right for them - which is a good thing. For me, and for my children, state school is the only option.

WideWebWitch · 05/02/2006 13:38

Oh god Cam, I'm sure you're right. I hope I'll have gone off to live in a commune (with broadband) before that happens.

springintheair · 05/02/2006 14:21

When you talk about privilege and money it really does depend which private school you're thinking about and where. Private school in London may mean fees of upwards of £8000 per year per child so yes, if you sent more than one child, you would need to be quite well off especially if you owned a home in London too. However, up north fees might be nearer £4,500. The 2 schools I am considering in the north west will actually cost less for 2 children full-time than nursery for 2 children for 3 days a week (which costs more than £700 a month). And the majority of parents whose children go to these schools are not from wealthy backgrounds and both parents work for a living (this is confirmed in the schools' inspection reports). I just find it interesting that nobody has the same prejudices and makes the same assumptions about how rich the parents are who 'choose' to send their children to private nurseries and nobody comments on how the children at private nurseries aren't going to mix with real people etc etc.

paolosgirl · 05/02/2006 14:34

Priavte nurseries are essential, not a luxury! They are the only solution if you a) don't have family nearby, and need childcare all year round, with no time off for sick leave and holidays as per childminders, and b)require childcare from 8am to 6pm. Private schools don't differ from state in that respect.

The other point re costs is that they may only cost £4,500 pa (lucky you!), but there are many other on-costs; school trips, uniform, sports gear, travel costs etc etc which bump up the cost considerably.

Tinker · 05/02/2006 14:43

No

Not read thread.

hana · 05/02/2006 14:48

primary no
secondary, absolutely

springintheair · 05/02/2006 14:49

Paulo's girl, I wish that state schools paid for uniforms, school trips etc but I'm afraid they don't any more than private schools do. Also, some people might see private schools as more of an essential than a luxury because their local state schools are so bad. Anyway, my main point was that nobody complains that children who go to private nurseries are only mixing with the rich and privileged etc etc yet private nurseries often cost considerably more than private schools.

soapbox · 05/02/2006 14:56

I do!

Doesn't buy me anything better than the education I got in a Scottish state primary school. But infinitely better than the other alternatives where we were living at the time we made our choice.

Sign of the times I think!

The teaching at my DCs school is in the main excellent. They have a very steady teaching staff with very low turnover.

I have friends who teach at primary level in the state sector and their view is that otfen the teaching is less than satisfactory.

One of my friends visits schools to help underperforming teachers up their game - some of the stories make my hair curl!!!

So yes I choose to spend my money on a decent education for my children. We are extremely fortunate to be able to do so, and still afford all the other luxuries of life. I'd like to be able to attribute our fortunate position to lots of personal achievements but I've long since realised that in the lottery of life, we were just fortunate to pick out a winning ticket

Tinker · 05/02/2006 15:01

These threads always reveal how far from real life mumsnet is though. Isn't it only 12% (?) of kids who go to private school yet seems like virtually all of mn go or angst about it.

hana · 05/02/2006 15:04

not everyone picks a winning lottery ticket, lots of people work hard to get where they are as well

Enid · 05/02/2006 15:04

one kind of 'real life' yes tinker

but we all exist in 'real life' too

Tortington · 05/02/2006 15:08

i think its great thatwe have private schools, keeps the arsey parents away from a proper school