Query for state school parents

[AeolineReed]

My children go to private schools. I have been repeatedly got at for this by colleagues/acquaintances/random MNers with children at state schools. We live in a town with decent state schools. Everyone I know cites 'principles' as the reason for choosing the state option, even if they could afford otherwise.

This same 'principle' argument seems to crop up on MN a lot - but I'm just wondering how much of this is based on living in a good catchment area? And if you have 'principles', do they extend to sending your children to a truly dire school if you could afford to go private?

Just wondering, as I am rather fed up with being the unprincipled baddy.

Yes, year 9 entry seems to be the norm.

Very, very difficult for us as ds1 has just been dx as dyslexic and therefore the liklihood of him passing an entrance exam is...not great.

Sorry Xenia but around here day school places at senior cost more like £15,000, that £5000 is a lot when you have more than one child. (And I'm not talking public schools which cost more like £30000.)

Local private schools round here cost roughly 5-5.5k per term. We'd be looking at over £30k per year.

In answer to OPs question, I know a man who insisted his son attend the local state school, because of man's principles. He was lauded to me as a wonderful man - rich and successful but chose to back his ideals. Son left school with 2 GCSEs, school was closed down, it was so crap. (Has now reopened) The man and his wife split up over it. The boy took resits at a local college.

This is an extreme case, but the stupid man knew the school was a sink school, not a thriving one. He valued his 'principles' above his son's happiness, situation, ability to thrive, and put his son's future in jeopardy, as well as undue stress on his wife. He fulfilled his principles without giving a toss for the welfare of others. That's not morally better than choosing a 'posh' school to avoid oiks. Both attitudes are selfish and under-considered.

I think if you genuinely care about education, you get the best you can for your children. If the best happens to be private and you can afford it, why not? It's silly to stamp feet and say not fair. We don't all live in identical houses, eat identical food, wear identical clothes. People earn and spend very differently. Hatred of private education mystifies me.

Hmm! I don't know about principles, surely it's a case of doing what you think is best for your children.
My son attends a lovely state primary school and is on the autistic spectrum. The school he attends is fabulous with children who have special needs, therefore even if I could afford it I would not choose a private education for him because IMO they couldn't better what he already has.

A local very successful businessman here sent all his children to state schools and tne grandchildren are following suit. All his children did well in state school and so are his grandchildren. We live in an area of good and less good state schools, his grandchildren are at one of the better ones.

It varies around the country. The just over £11k fees I quoted are not too far out of London in Herts. it is interesting that schools with worse exam results can cost nearly a third more in some places. Where there is a boarding school attached the day fees seem to be higher.

Well, here in SW London it's just short of 18K per annum for DS and that's London day school; and about 14k for DD. GPDST comes out a bit cheaper - don't know why there isn't something similar for boys - does anyone else.

married
I was at GPDST - they have economies of scale on central purchasing and a non earning management board

it has to be remembered that MOST private schools in this country are nominally charities - and are having a HUGE fight with HMRC over their status

ALSO
in this weeks Economist - which I finished reading in bed this morning - it pointed out that private school fees have increased at double the rate of house price inflation (let alone real inflation) over the past 15 years

all of a sudden I understood by my Harrovian BiL thought that the fees were mad for his DC
The private schools have ramped up their fees for years without providing VFM

• time more parents called their bluff

Oh, silly me - 1/4 of the new "free" schools are ex fee payers nuff said

Talk, but if more and more private school pupils are getting the best university places many many more than in the 60s surely the private schools are exactly doing that - providing masses of added value and more than when their fees were less (although of course I would like to pay less and am now in year 24 of paying school fees continuously, lucky me?

I simply cannot afford it.
Jealous emoticon.