We are not rich. Both the boys went to a very small private prep school. Initially they went to the nursery then DS1, whose birthday is October, was offered a place in their reception class a year before his place was available at our very good local state primary. I accepted the place but explainied he would be going to the state primary the nextyear. No problem. He had a lovely year, tiny classes, lots of affection - they are actually allowed to give children a cuddle when they are upset or have hurt themselves. Flexible hours - we could leave him from 8 till 6. Theypovided breakfast, lunch, tea. As promised we sent him to the state primary thenext year. Changed from a class of 9 to a class of 38. He was bored rigid. They did reading practise one every 3 days. He said his teacher "didn't know how to do sums". We couldn't leave him until the dot of 9 which was exceedingly difficult as we both work long hours. The final straw was when we dropped him at school one day when it was very slightly snowy to be told to take him home as so few of the teachers had turned in they were closing. Our younger son was still at the prep school round the corner where there was no problem. What did they expect us to do at such short notice? This helped us make a decision we had been mulling over for a term. We took him in to his old school and asked if he could go back. Both boys are now at independent secondary schools. Academic entry and fierce competition for places. Huge ethnic diversity at both. Scholarships at one. Burseries at both £7k a year each. We don't have a second car and have recently down-graded our home both in property size and area as we feel the most important thing we can give them is this chance. If there had been a good local secondary they would have gone. Believe me. Our best local secondary still just has 54% getting 5 gcses at A to C compared with 98% and 97%. At the schools they go to there are no unathorised absences, zero tolerance on bullying, drugs or bad behaviour. There are local private schools which you can just buy into, you don't have to pass any entrance exam. There are many more very, very rich people go there. At the boys' schools most people are "ordinary". You are making decision, as a customer, on how to spend your money if you are lucky enough to have it to spend. Uniform is not expensive and most state schools now have uniform. Facilties for sports and other out of school activities are superb. The boys have never gone on any expensive holidays with the school. Some of their friends of much better off, most are in a very similar financial situation to us. They don't seem to give a damn. One boy from a wealthy background (more than one home) is best friends with a boy who lives with his single mum in a council flat. He's on a bursary. Boys have friends from school, from other private schools and from state schools. You pay your money, you make your choice. When our boys took their entrance exams (they entered for 3 schools) they made the final choice themselves of which school they attended. Hence two different schools which is not ideal but they chose what they felt was right for them. Sod's law DS1 (who is very clever) won a scholarship to another local private school btu didn't accept the place as he was determined to attend his final choice (who don;'t offer scholarships - grinding of teeth) We have friends whose kids are at state schools who have much posher houses, cars, clothes and holidays than us but thatis there choice and we have made our own. Live and let live. The kids do!!