I resent school.

[spidermama]

I have a sneaking feeling I'll be the only one thinking this .... again ... but I'm really wishing I didn't have to send my kids to school five days a week.
It seems school presents something new to irritate me every day. Today brought news that parents who take their children out of school during SATs (don't even get me started on SATs [agnry]) will be fined.
I think this is outrageous interference.

Spider, definitely get your dh to do some reading, I recommend:

anything by John Holt
Educating at Home / Alan Thomas
The Next Learning System: and why home-schoolers are trailblazers / Roland Meighan
Getting Started in Home Education / Mary Ann Rose and Paul Stanbrook
Free Range Education / ed. Terri Dowty

I decided I wanted to home educate but felt very anxious about it, specifically the socialisation thing, and whether I was competent to do the teaching. The more I read, the more I relaxed. Forced socialisation in peer groups is actually very unnatural and does not necessarily prepare people well for real life where they have to get along with all sorts of people. The current school system springs from the Industrial era when it was a perfect preparation for real life: doing a mindless job in a factory, with a group of your peers. But don't get me started! After reading a few books I now feel very confident about home ed, and also have the information to back up my ideas when people say "Home education? But what about.....?"

No offence meant to any teacher, btw, it's the system I have problems with (as do many teachers I know).

Most of these books should be available (or to order) from your local library. Which reminds me of one of the best benefits of home educating which I have just discovered. You can get a special library card with a 12 week loan period, no charges for holds or educational videos, and NO FINES EVER! (for someone who used to 'donate' about half our net income to the library in fines and hold charges, this is a big deal ) Good luck with it - I think it will be a great adventure for you and your family.

Gosh. Didn't know about never having any library fines. That's almost enough to make me take up home edding!

(I've stopped going to the library because literally every single time I borrow a book, I end up paying almost the cost of it in fines. Sigh.)

Caligula, you don't actually have to home ed I guess, all you have to do is join Education Otherwise (£20 a year). However joining just to get the free library thing would be very norty.

I'm glad you've got to a stage where you feel able to try an alternative, Spidermama, even if your dh isn't being too supportive atm. Good luck!

Frannyf, I agree about the forced peer group stuff. My dd is at a tiny, 28 pupil school where the children all mix with each other, from age 4.5yrs to 12yrs and it's completely fabulous. Because it's a small school everyone thinks the children have problems when they get to senior schooling but in fact they don't, partly because they've been mixing with children from other small schools and partly because they are not intimidated by the 'big ones' as they've been playing with them for seven years! I wish every child could go to schools like these, they are amazing.

frannyf-how do you get that card?

Take it I can't get one for keeping ds out of playgroup?

That card would probably justify my loss of income in itself.

(think your book reccomendations are great, btw. I find John Holt really interesting-he really did live his life by his principles. Just out of interest, are you unschooling or more structured?)

sorry, just seen other post re card.

Merglemergle - ds is only 2.5 so I haven't really had my educational philosophies tested yet.

I like the unschooling vibe, but know from experience that I feel more comfortable when things have structure, so we'll see. I'm hoping it can be a seamless transition from all the stuff we do now, but of course when his peers all go to school that alarm bell is going to be going off in my head - "Ok, now we have to actually sit down and learn something useful, instead of just enjoying ourselves."

I may end up sending him to school of course. But I don't think so.

SueDonim - that school sounds marvellous! I agree about the age groups mixing, I have seen that at EO meetings, and I do think the home ed children are (huge generalisation alert) more confident and friendly with a wide range of people because they have not just been closeted with their peers and an authoritative adult for years of their life. They approach you sensibly and have a proper conversation - I like that.

suedonim there are still some village schools like that around here but many parents move their children out. Reasons I have heard are that they are not able to play proper team sports i.e. cannot make up a soccer team and play against another school; that they do not like the school the village school feeds into or sometimes because they just feel there is something missing.

That's exactly the sort of comment made by teachers at the senior school, about the small-school children, Franny! They are somehow more rounded and adjust more easily to the new way of things. Overall, small schools do better academically, too. There's lots of research on the net about the benefits of small scale education. Dd's school is like a big happy family. Everyone is so caring, the teaching is personalised for each child and the whole person is nurtured. I doubt money could buy a better education.

We only have one senior school, SueW, so that's not an issue for the local schools here - everyone goes there. Afaik, schools in our LEA don't have their own footie teams; instead all the towns/villages have local teams that anyone can join, no matter where you go to school, so there's plenty of team sports available. The footie field is right opposite our house! There can indeed be something missing from a school. A school is only as good as its head, imo, but I guess locally they've got it right as they have excellent staff at all the village schools, who work as a team.

Anyway, gotta go now - I'm going out for my birthday tea!

spidermama - havent had a chance to read all of this thread as it is long!

A local primary school here has opted for a more contential style of opening. They are open at 7am for breakfast (optional) and lessons start at 8am. The day finishes at 1.30pm - but there are after school club that the children are encouraged to attend. I thought that this was much better hours.

Good luck with the home schooling - somebody I know homeschools her 3 children very successfully.

Thanks to everyone who has contributed to this thread. I've found it most encouraging to know so many people understand why I'm about to take the leap. The more I read, the more excited and positive I feel.

Frannyf thanks for the positive words and for the book recommendations. I'm a member of EO now so will do the library thing.

I know exactly what you mean about HE kids being confident and able to mix well with adults. There's something charming and unguarded about the ones I've met. My two have learned a certain surlyness since starting school.

MIL is here at the moment so dh and I have decided not to talk about the subject at this stage.

Good luck! You'll get lots of support from the EO forum, and also some great links to websites. I'm sure your dh will be won over very soon - there was an eo thing recently where men wrote about their feelings and how they'd changed their minds. May be worth tracking down - I'm no longer on the forum I'm afraid as mine are back in boring school for now.

Good Lord no, don't mention it to the MIL! Other people may shock you with how anti they are, or just how misguided their conceptions about HE are. Partly why I decided to do all the reading and thinking now when ds is young - hopefully by the time he is of school age people will have got used to the idea that we are doing it, as I didn't want the pressure and arguments at a time that will presumably be quite unsettling for him anyway, with most of his friends going off to school. I think your best bet would be to present it as a fait accompli - "Oh, we've taken the children out of school, it's going wonderfully," and hopefully show a united front. People get so extremely bothered by it, I presume it must be a major threat to the fabric of our society or something.

True frannyf. It threatens catergories which most people are at pains to uphold at all costs.
I'm hoping to get MIL on board in the long run as she's a teacher - a brilliant teacher - and would be an asset to us.
You're right though ... I'll bide my time and bite my tongue for now.