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Pros and cons of late registration with a private school (state school is a disaster, drastic action required!)

80 replies

CasperTFG · 20/09/2010 22:47

I am not going to get into too much detail - but the first two weeks of a north London state school reception year has been seriously underwhelming for us and our DS.

(well here's a tidbit... ...at a parents night, one of DS's future teachers ran a powerpoint presentation for parent one evening at the school at one stage she felt the need to clarify to the assembled parents about a word she had been using (it was "numeracy") - she explained to us all "vat iz maffs"

Anyhoo...

We now find ourselves behind schedule for getting DS a place / interview for private school.

Are we at a disadvantage to get him a place now the year has started? Or should our money (and DS) be welcome?

Any tips on an emergency 'change of plan' involving sudden shift to private school much appreciated..

We ought to be able to get him in somewhere.. right?

Disaster.... DW is in floods, DS is mute and miserable...No PLU there at all...

In a rush to get him somewhere nice..

Help!

Thanks...

OP posts:
belledechocolatefluffybunny · 20/09/2010 22:51

Do what you need to. Some don't like accepting children during term time, check with the schools first. They do sometimes have spaces during the year so check with the school first. Be careful though, the last thing you need is to panic, accept a place and find out it's a hole (there's some dire private schools). Do your research and make sure it's the right school for your children.

Alouiseg · 20/09/2010 22:54

If your ds isn't 5 yet then I think you could just remove him from school. I'm sure the beginning of term is such a blur for many reception pupils that it won't matter to him starting mid term.

bigstripeytiger · 20/09/2010 22:55

Are there any state schools in your area that might be better?
(Im not against private schools, just that it might be another option).

onimolap · 20/09/2010 23:03

Places do come up in private schools -surprisingly frequently (often families relocating to out of Town), and it's unconnected to the standard/desiribility of the school.

Do you have a list of potential schools already? Did you visit any before choosing the current school? If so, you need to get on to the admissions offices of each one to arrange visits.

If not, try the Schoolsnet website - you can search a radius around your home or workplace to see what schools there are you can reach.

I can quite see why you'd want to get a move on, but don't skimp the research as you would for any admissions: children are very resilient but a second move might be a bit much.

ASmallBunchOfFlowers · 20/09/2010 23:03

If you are determined to chuck it in after a fortnight - on the grounds that there aren't any People Like You and one teacher is (I think you're saying) not a native English speaker - then as belle says you need to research your alternatives very carefully. If you take the 'any school with a vacancy' approach you could end up in the same (or worse) situation again.

CasperTFG · 20/09/2010 23:10

Hmmmm....DS (number 1) is NOT yet 5 (will be in Jan 2011)

He is 4 years and 8 months old

Will we be within the law to keep him out of school if he isn't yet 5?

Another plan being seriously considered is a strategic rental near a good school (locally) use DS 2 (aged 3) as our 'ace in the hole' to get into the school - then have DS 1 go on that schools waiting list as "priority sibling" (+ proximity within catchment...)

Its really what to do NOW with DS 1 - the 4 year 8 month child....?

Can we yank him out of the hell hole while we regroup and form an action plan (we are ready to rent out / sell our house!)

We really got it badly wrong..

Does keeping him out of school only become illegal AFTER he turns 5?

Thanks for assistance so far..!!!!

OP posts:
CasperTFG · 20/09/2010 23:12

(BTW I assure you the problem is a lot deeper than one teacher with a cockney accent!)

And thanks again...

OP posts:
sethstarkaddersmum · 20/09/2010 23:14

it's not illegal even after he's 5 because you can home school him - see the home school threads on here if becomes likely you might need to, I am sure they can explain the legal situation to you.

Quattrocento · 20/09/2010 23:18

You sound as though you are rushing into this tbh

I don't know why you weren't thinking when you chose your school in the first place ...

But it's madness not to think properly over the second school choice and really take your time and do your research properly.

Might be better to get him into a school you REALLY like next year and leave him in the 'hellhole'

Ladymuck · 20/09/2010 23:19

Depends on the number of private schools in the area, but if they have spaces you should be able to start when you want. BUT private is not always better, and you need to think about what you're looking for.

Bluebell99 · 20/09/2010 23:25

I think you need to give us more information as to what is wrong with the current school as the example you have given makes you sound racist and snobbish! Have you actually been into the school and talked about the issues? Settling into school in the first few weeks can be really difficult and the schools reaction to you, will give you insight into what the school is like. Your other plan sounds nuts tbh. And i think you need to research your options really carefully, as it could be disasterious to move him again.

Vespasian · 20/09/2010 23:28

You are rushing, I can't believe you have chosen this an an example of a good reason to move schools.

moajab · 20/09/2010 23:28

I think it may be illegal to rent a property just to get into a school's catchment if it is not going to be your main residence. Although it would be possible to put name on list for that school anyway and a place may come up and then DS2 will have sibling priority.
DS1 does not have to attend school until the term after his 5th birthday so you could remove him from his currant school.
I really wouldn't rush into any other school, as it would be so unsettling for him to keep moving school so you need to get it right next time.
I'm afraid I see nothing wrong with the teacher explaining what Numeracy is. When I was at school it was always called Maths, so there may be parents who are unaware what it means or think it just involves numbers, when it actually includes shape, patterns, time, money etc.
Good luck with whatever you decide!

seeker · 20/09/2010 23:30

It's a hellhole because one of the teachers has a funny accent?

You mention deeper problems - why dod you pick that one then?

Or is it that there might be parents at the achool who may not know what the word numeracy in this context means?

Doodlez · 20/09/2010 23:34

"racist" Bluebell Hmm How's that then? Confused

Calm down Casper - you sound demented!

Many private schools welcome children joining them at all points throughout the year. Many children are moved at odd times because parents jobs get moved at random times. Private schools are, for the most part, used to it and handle new children coming in mid-way through a term very well.

That said, North London private schools might be full to bustin', so, step number 1, do some research. Check out ALL local schools, both state and private and land on the one that'll suit your son and has a place for him. Then make a decision on your living arrangements.

You MUST visit schools to know what they're like. S'no good going off league tables or what Mrs Upherownarse at the tennis club reckons (she hasn't got YOUR children. She can only speak for her own).

I moved both my children to private last year. My DS was 8 and my DD was 6. All's well and they settled beautifully. Much of that is to do with how brilliantly our new school handled their entry and settling period.

Vespasian · 20/09/2010 23:35

Tbh if the OP wants to move schools because she feels the other parents or teachers are common or beneath her at least she is being honest with herself and that is her right. People distinguish between state schools for similar reasons.

I don't get it but perhaps it would be best all round. However it is not a choice to be rushed into

maktaitai · 20/09/2010 23:44

A relative of mine moved her son into a private school at extremely short notice when his state school showed no interest in a bullying problem. I'm sure that, given a collective decision to move, you will find a good solution.

If the school is that bad (I'm assuming it's not just that the teacher labialises her interdental sounds), I would look seriously at home educating your son until you find an appropriate school - partly because it will remove the urgency from the decision, allowing you to take your time and feel really confident about your next plans.

CasperTFG · 21/09/2010 00:07

Thanks for the help here.

Yanking him out tomorrow is good for us. Rushing to next option is bad I totally agree.

I won't be drawn into Blubells argument trap (her and any supporters feel free to light torches and gather in a menacing pack outside my house) you can amuse yourself playing devils advocate online but I have to think of DS 1 2 and 3's future!

We would not do a bogus catchment rental btw (stupid move as people would quite rightly whistle blow on us as we would on them) we would really move and really rent our place out. That's really "living there" and it would cost us likely over 30k in rent over year. (we would make far less renting our place out)

My question here arent meant to provoke and I sincerely thank the people here being helpful.

OP posts:
CasperTFG · 21/09/2010 00:16

And putting up with iPhone typos

OP posts:
onceamai · 21/09/2010 06:46

We had a hideous nursery year with eldest son and with hindsight I wish we had moved him after the first three weeks rather than going with the flow (or to an extent swimming against it for a year). But he's 15 now, it did no lasting damage and he doesn't remember it.

seeker · 21/09/2010 06:54

How can you POSSIBLY know after 3 less than 3 weeks....and honestly, teh example you chose makes you sound bonkers. Honestly.

Alouiseg · 21/09/2010 06:54

Fwiw i think Bluebell is being completely ridiculous.

I would have been livid at having numeracy explained to me in such a patronizing manner.

I would probably not send him back to the school.

I would send a letter explaining why and cc to the LEA. I'd also inform the chair of governors and possibly my MP.

Poor education shouldn't be accepted it needs to be challenged.

Good luck in your search for a new school.

CasperTFG · 21/09/2010 07:05

I can believe it. thanks for sharing that

We just don't want our budding Einstein to be on his own playing with Lego for a year or in the playground staring at his shoes. The other kids are mostly mute. (and it was the same at the attached nursery all last year)

Did anyone see the tv show BBC 2 9pm last night?

3 and 4 year olds ONE YEAR behind?

Well THATS what it's like.

We're outta there.

Disaster......

Operation "fix it "underway....

The lesson learned is...
Offstead outstanding, + 1 personal recomendation + cute uniform does not = ideal for everyone.

OP posts:
CasperTFG · 21/09/2010 07:09

We went to all the tours and parent evenings too.

OP posts:
seeker · 21/09/2010 07:13

This is a wind up. It has to be.

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