I Don't Want to Be One of Those Buyers Whom Sellers Complain About !

[Helena1964]

I've been on Ebay for several years ( buying, never selling ). I've purchased over 80 things, and I've always prided myself on paying immediately, to be considerate to the seller. I know, from RL friends and from reading this Topic Section, how stressful it can be for sellers.

I just bought a small item-doll hair ribbons. I didn't realize that my PayPal account was a few dollars short. ( My fault, of course-I should have been on the ball about it.)

I have always authorized PayPal to go into my linked bank account in case I didn't have enough PayPal funds. I always assumed that, if this were done, the payment would process immediately. ( Again my fault, to not have read the fine print ). Now I've been informed that the payment will be in the form of an "E-check", which may take until the 20th to clear. ( I don't use credit cards, so can't add funds that way.)

I feel terrible about making the seller wait for so long. I would never have bought the item had I known. I'm going to message her to apologize, but I'm afraid it will sound lame-I'm sure anyone whose been selling on Ebay for any length of time has heard all the excuses in the book.

Should I offer to obtain a Green Dot Money Pack, so that I can at least pay her tomorrow ? ( I won't be able to get somewhere to buy one until then. ) Or would this complicate things more, because the pending E-check would have to be cancelled ?

I suffer from anxiety, and now the guilt is really adding to it.

write to them asap, apologise and explain.

ask them to check your pristine feedbacks so far as proof that you are not normally this late with payment.

I'm pretty sure they will be accomodating - just ask them what they want done.

I'm sorry you are suffering from anxiety, I know that beast from experience. I hope you get help for that - and that your Ebay situation will get sorted.

it isn't a problem - it just means the seller will wait for the echeque to clear before dispatching the item. It really is absolutely nothing to worry about.

Don't sweat it, e cheques though uncommon are a normal part of eBay selling. The seller is notified when the funds are clear.

You really have nothing to apologise for.

Thank you, everyone ! I was just typing a response to ZingWantsCake, thanking her for her advice, and reassurance, when my stress caused me to accidentally exit the browser. When I got back on MN, I saw the other reassuring messages from LilyBossom and The Fallen Ninja. Thanks to you all.

I keep trying to remind myself that making a mistake doesn't make me a bad person, and that the seller is in all likelihood not a fearsome ogre, but a reasonable human being who will understand that I'm trying to rectify my
mistake.

I sent the seller a message, taking forever to type it because my stress kept causing me to mistype. I hope she replies soon.

And thank you, Zing, for your kind words regarding my anxiety. It's one of those things that only a fellow sufferer understands. Usually I get through it with self-talk, but it's been a stressful week. I really hope that your experiences with it are now a thing of the past.

What an angst-ridden evening, all over some silly Cabbage Patch Doll hair ribbons !

I just checked my email and found the seller's reply. She was extremely kind about it, and said not to worry. I feel so much better !

It's only 10:24 in the evening where I am, but this has tired me out so much that I'm going to bed.

Thanks again, everyone !

As a seller that wouldn't bother me. bit of faff to remember to post it when it finally clears, that's all, not entirely your fault.

Oh Good Lord, don't worry about it at all. Given that a significant percentage of buyers are rude, dishonest, inconsiderate twats, I'm sure your seller will have nothing to complain about a payment being a bit late. It's not like you haven't paid. I never understood why echeques take so long to clear given that the money goes immediately from your bank account unless of course PayPal are banking it and claiming the interest

Helena I'm glad the seller was nice about it and I hope you had a good sleep.

I had panic attacks and anxiety when I was heavily pg with my 4th and we lived with PILs for 2 months (bad timing but we had to have builders in our house).
easy to see why I was worried, nevertheless after DS4 was born I had counselling which was really helpful - it turned out that bad time management was causing a lot of problems!
who would have thought?
she also thaught me a good breathing technique (I used to hyperventilate when panicked) which stops the panic attack from escalating.

I'm not "cured" but I can't remember the last time I had a panic attack - that's pretty good.

I do hope you get some help, it can be overcome!
and I'm happy to listen to you here if you want.

The seller is so nice that she's posting the items today, even though the Echeck won't clear for several days ! ( And PayPal advises sellers not to risk this. )

Thank you, too, lljk and Tryharder for your reassuring words. I also wonder why PayPal takes such a long time to process things. That's why I always use MoneyPaks when adding funds to my account, rather than transferring money from my bank. ( I also have my suspicions that they are profiting from it. )

Wow, Zing, you certainly went through a hard time. Even a non-anxious person would be stressed out being pregnant while simultaneously being temporarily displaced by builders. I hope that your PILS were nice ! Of course, now you have a beautiful 4th DS and an improved home so it was worth it.

I've never had a panic attack but I witnessed a coworker having one. None of us at work knew that she suffered from them, and since she wasn't able to clearly communicate with us at first, we actually called an ambulance. It was terrifying to watch, so I can only imagine how much worse it was to be the actual sufferer. I'm glad that you haven't had one for a very long time. Hopefully you'll never have another.

And I'll be here, too, to listen and handhold if you need to vent here.