Same sex relationship IUI

[PumpkinSpicedLatte]

Hi, my partner and I (same sex lesbian couple) are hopefully starting our donor journey in the summer.
I have a daughter from a previous marriage and conceived first time naturally with her. It will be me carrying this baby.
I have had my TV ultrasound to have a look and check on my ovaries etc and my follicle count was 21 and AMH was 12.7 and will be having my HyCosy when my STI checks come back.
We are then going to start the process of finding a donor and hopefully be ready by summer.
I just wondered if anyone else is going through this and whether we could maybe chat in the thread? I had a lot of PN mental health problems with my daughter (Lockdown baby-not sure if that was a contributor), so I think they say they offer counselling but I’ll probably need to also speak to my GP too.
anyway, it’s all a bit new to me so I’m both excited but nervous about this.

if anyone has had IUI before, can I hear good and bad stories please?

Hi OP. I’m in a same sex couple. We have 2 children, our first was conceived by IUI which was successful first time (my wife carried). Our second we have recently had and was conceived via IVF after I had 2 failed rounds of IUI. Feel free to fire away if you have any specifics you’d like answering!

I had 4 rounds of IUI, all unsuccessful. We found the whole process expensive and stressful.
We had a break from IUI and met someone who would go on to become our donor for DS. We did home insemination and it worked first time (I carried).
From my experience i wouldn't recommend IUI.

Ok thank you both for your stories. I’m really anxious that it won’t work 😞

I had IUI using a donor as a single woman and found the boards here really useful back then. I had four failed founds of IUI, then two fresh and two frozen transfers, the last of which worked. The process took about three and a half years from initial research to birth.

I used a donor through my clinic - they had their own bank. The donor coordinator sent me two profiles and I picked one. They also provided a mandatory counselling session at the start of the process, with the option for more later (I never took this up).

Good luck in your journey!

Hi @PumpkinSpicedLatte we’re just a fraction ahead of you in the journey being currently in the TWW on our first round of IUI. Clinic we’re with are amazing, don’t hesitate in getting all your tests done would be my advice. We had to plan last minute smear tests, CGT, blood tests all at fairly short notice. Also it’s never too early to start taking your supplements, Folic Acid, Vitamin D, Spatone for Iron, Bone broth. I’ve also been having acupuncture for fertility, makes me feel nice and relaxed. Hoping for a bfp when we can test. Being susceptible to melancholy myself I have concerns about PND but consult with your GP would be the way to go. Also counselling sessions (we get 3 with our treatment) use them, that’s what they’re there for!

@TwoNewMummas thanks so much and good luck to you both! Will you let me know whether you get your positive in two weeks? It’s an agonising wait for sure, especially when you are having treatment I imagine.
thanks for all your advice, I’ll start with the supplements now as it can’t hurt! X

I'm also lesbian and had my first child (by DIY DI) 20 years ago. MN was hugely helpful to me then so I'm sure you'll find lots of support. Good luck!

Absolutely will let you know! Have had back ache, sore boobs, felt a bit nauseous but it goes away when I eat and my Progesterone bloods came back at 65mnol which is definitely proof that I ovulated so I’ve got everything crossed. Just watch the strength of the vitamin D you take as too much can be harmful. If you have any other questions please reach out, more than happy to share our experience if it helps put your mind at ease. X

@TwoNewMummas hey how are you? I went for my HyCosy today and it went really well so we are registering with the sperm bank soon!

Hey! Unfortunately we had a failed attempt but we’re lining everything up to go again this month. I’m currently on Day 4 so back on Letrozole and waiting for an appointment for my first scan Day 9/10. Getting the negative test felt like a bit of a kick in the teeth as everything was looking good but symptoms I had were probably from the Progesterone. Always learning on this journey and feel like we’re in a much better place for knowing what to expect this time round - and staying occupied during the TWW. Great that you had your HyCoSy, hope the result was good 😊
We went with Sussex Sperm Bank and they were absolutely fantastic, excellent range of donors and the staff are lovely. X

IUI success rates are pretty low. I'm healthy and young, and had 9 rounds with donor sperm - all failed.

I then got pregnant on first round of IVF with donor sperm.

I felt IUI was a bit like throwing a dart at a board with a blindfold on and hoping you get bullseye. You might, but it's a pretty slim chance. It's basically like having sex one time per month and hoping to get pregnant. Most people who conceive naturally will DDT multiple times around the fertile window.

I'd say give IUI a go, because it is less invasive and sometimes it does work. But don't hang around wasting time on it if it's not working - be prepared to move over to IVF. I wish I just did 3 IUI's.

Thank you for sharing your experience, we’re going for another round of IUI and then will switch to IVF, wife and I both agree on this. I’m 35 but really fertile so going for IVF first felt a bit like going for the nuclear option. Not afraid to cut our losses on IUI if this one doesn’t work though. X

@TwoNewMummashope things are going well for you both. I was all set for IUI but I am older 39 and looks like I will be going down the IVF route. Do let us know how you get on.

Wishing you all the very best of luck with your IVF cycle. How have you found it locating a donor? We were successful on round 2 thankfully and are 10 weeks today. Have seen heartbeat on our scan at 6+4 so just hoping that everything is still okay at 12 weeks. X

@TwoNewMummasi hope everything is going well! I am trying to navigate UK v EU treatment but either way I need to get moving. Donor spend will be from ESB

Everything going well so far thank you, had a good 12 week scan and tests came back all clear and good. We're having a surprise but from all the sickness everyone is getting boy vibes. Not much of a bump to speak of yet but 16 week appointment next week and having a private scan to see HB etc. as NHS scan was over in 5 mins!!!
So exciting that you have found your donor! I know of people who have had success with IVF clinics in Athens but could you ship over here to have treatment closer to home? Less time off etc. Wishing you all the very best of luck with it!

My kids are in their 20s now but both conceived via IUI. First took 6 cycles and second took 4. It’s a tough process as with any fertility treatment. Both conceived with two inseminations in the one cycle. I had to push to try this as they said the statistics say it doesn’t increase the success rate. But 100% success rate here.

For anyone looking at this thread in the future, we are having our first IUI procedure tomorrow. Had my trigger shot this morning

Good luck!!!!

Good luck @PumpkinSpicedLatte

💯 understand your stress as it is so out of your control. Good luck‼️ We are same sex relationship, had IUI our two are now 19 and 17. Four rounds first time, one the second. Keep us posted 👍

Good luck!!!

Thank you, the procedure was lovely and positive and very quick! Now onto the three week wait 🫶

I’m glad all went well & crossing everything for you!!

also same sex couple, we considered IUI but opted for adoption in the end!

love being a mom and hoping for good news from you soon!!!

I am currently 8 weeks pregnant and had a scan last week and we saw the heartbeat. Pleased to say our first cycle worked, hoping it continues to go well 💚