TTC Donor

[MumMT18]

Hi, so me and my DW (both women) have decided to have another DC. I conceived our first with a known donor. My wife would like to conceive the next child, we have been for tests with Manchester fertility and everything came back fine - we specified that we would like a black donor as this is my background. We were supposed to start treatment this week and they said they would send a list of donors to us to choose (we signed up with them in January) they have sent us a mixed donor and said there are no black donors available. We have then asked why we're we not told earlier and what the next steps would be.

They have now advised us to order the sperm ourselves from overseas in california and offered no support to help us do that. We have not paid them yet as we asked how much we would get off if we are sourcing the sperm ourselves, they could not tell us this they said until we have paid and shipped the sperm to them. We thought this was a strange way in working as we are set to pay them 3500 and its 800 for a vial to be shipped from USA

When we searched we found a couple of options in california and checked the FAQs and there was a section on home insemination we didn't realise this was an option but now Weare considering it. Has anyone ever ordered and tried home insemination with frozen sperm or am I best sticking with the experts? We conceived our daughter at home so we know how to do it but just not had experience with frozen sperm. Is anyone able to help?

Thanks

It's not actually allowed in the UK as the sperm has to be shipped to a clinic. There's a place in Shrewsbury that will allow you to do it but they still charge £500 for you to self-inseminate there.

I'm sorry your clinic were so rubbish and didn't let you know about the lack of donors sooner.

Thanks so much for letting me know. We have asked for a price after the sperm was shipped but they refuse to give us this information

We haven't been through this before so was trying to look at all our options but we are really limited and we were not expecting this delay

The thing with doing it at home with frozen is that you have to be spot on with timings as the defrosted sperm doesn't live as long inside you as fresh does, maybe only 48 hours. At the Shrewsbury clinic they will scan you to see if you've ovulated for an extra £50 to help you to pinpoint when to inseminate.

I've only ever done fresh home insemination with a known donor as then you've got around 5 days to play with.

With the clinic they can control timings with medication or base it on OPKs. I had a few tries with chilled sperm and it was stressful as the timings never worked out. I think I'd find it unbearable if I was paying so much for each vial plus shipping.