I'm scared

[Courgettesandbananas]

of doing the whole donor thing alone. Shouldn't I adopt rather than bringing a child into the world who won't have a family apart from me?

Ok... firstly, yes you should adopt MORALLY some would say but it's really up to you.

@Courgettesandbananas I personally didn't want to adopt as I wanted to experience pregnancy. I really don't think there is anything wrong with having this desire. If you adopt and youre child doesn't have a wide family network, there'd be no difference if the child was biologically yours. Perhaps take some more time to think about it and maybe you can contact some people at the Donor Conception Network.

@idontwannaneedthem Why would you say that is morally more acceptable? I'd like to see how you've arrived at that conclusion - it would make 99% of the society immoral for wanting a biological child.

@Courgettesand bananas It's a very personal decision and whichever way you go, you need to ready. It's sounds like you aren't quite there yet. Have you had any counselling to organise your thoughts and help you with the decision making process?

What do you mean about an adopted child having a family apart from you? For example, a disinterested bio mother with a drug problem and an unknown father? Sound more like an issue rather than a benefit.

Don't be scared. I imagine becoming a parent in any situation is bloody scary.

Only you can decide how you want to become a parent.

Do you have no support network whatsoever?

thanks everyone so much. i do have a big support network which is great. i have decided (since writing this) that i will adopt and/or find someone i know to be the donor. Still scared, but at least i have made some progress with my thoughts. i am old (40) - i don't know how i got to be this old - but need to make some decisions fast and act on them. wish me luck and thank you ALL so much

Good luck