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Divorce/separation

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Staying or moving - separation

1 reply

Sair1016 · Today 07:49

We are a year down the line and are in the middle of selling our family home. I have been viewing houses for some time and it is just so expensive out there with a lot of houses too small or big enough but then hit by higher costs and stamp duty..

My ex and I get on very well still we have two boys and he has suggested I stay and we carry on with a joint mortgage while the boys are at the local school and re assess when they move in 2 years time…. He would rent somewhere if I could contribute more.

So now I am thinking is this the best thing to do right now while house prices are crazy and we have a low mortgage and a bigger house for the boys here? I could change things around and redecorate and he has his own space else where?

Had anyone done this and it worked? If so how did you set boundaries as it will technically still be his house too but I would want it to be that in more of a ‘business’ sense.

Sorry for the long post!

OP posts:
millymollymoomoo · Today 11:50

Well I think that’s ok in the short term - it could take nearly that long to divorce, agree finances, move etc anyway.

however, my questions would be

  1. is there enough money to run 2 homes? Can he rent something appropriately where the children can go stay and feel like it’s a home ( ie not squashed into one bed flat !

  2. what happens if you meet someone else? Will you be able to take them to ‘yours’, will your ex feel put out that another man is in his home that he’s still paying for ? ( right now you probably dont see this happening but it very well could)

  3. what changes in 2 years ( other than schools) children still need same space/house prices will still be expensive /stamp duty will still be there

  4. is he proposing to still pay a share of mortgage of just stay on it while you pay 100%? Can you afford to ?

so in principle I think it’s possible but need to agree the finer points. The devil is in the detail

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