Why do people hurt partners

[Brokenlifeat50]

Hi.
I have come on this Website looking for a womams point of view.
2025/2026, actually to be honest the last 4 years have been terrible for me.
Im currently going through a divorce following my wifes 3rd affair, some people have said why didnt tou leave her after the first affair, basically I didn't even leave her after this one the third affair, she asked for the divorce.
Im sadly quite a forgiving person, also after years of her affairs I have no confidence left.
Being 50 is hard, no women seem to be attracted to me anymore (dont seem to be looked at walking down the street etc anymore). and I.recently joined a dating app but no one really contacted me even though I tried
Basically after a 10 year of marriage, Firstly why would a womam break her husband the first time, watch him go trough therapy to get over her affair then do it again with two other men (at different tines) behind her husband's back.
I have a good job, I don't drink alot and I dont smoke, I keep myslef fit and go to the gym to keep active.
Im a family man and really enjoy being in a relationship,
Just feel that life has now passed me by kids have grown up and moved on and that people's morrels have changed, ive alway wanted to spend my life with a slender, happy and loving good girl, but that dream seems to be over for me.
Why do people hurt people?

This sounds like a bad dating ad rather than a request for any insight. Slender? What does slender have to do with anything? You forgave your wife 3 times because she's not fat?

People hurt their partners because they are unhappy and dissatisfied, and either cannot communicate that to their partner or have tried and failed.

Of course you have no confidence left. But it will come back as you get time away from her.

“ive alway wanted to spend my life with a slender, happy and loving good girl,”
This bit, though, feels weird to me, it indicates you don’t really understand that a relationship has to have two people actively contributing to it. Are you someone that the person you want would be attracted to?

Im genuinely sorry if it reads that way, its not a dating advert, please disregard the slender comment, it was a comment that your completely correct about, i shouldn't of made it, it was just an overview and comment.

Imo it's fine that your preference is for a slim woman. We all have preferences

The fact that you're looking for a girl....and you're a middle aged man .....makes me feel a bit sick

I'm guessing you don't mean an actual underage female, but I do think it's important to watch your words and check your thoughts

If I were you I'd get some counselling. You've allowed your wife to treat you like shit, probably because you have no self confidence and no self belief.

You need to find out why you're the way you are and help yourself heal

Also - you're definitely not ready to date atm. Work on YOU. Stop looking for someone to paper over the cracks. If you don't heal from the inside out, all this crap will just keep on happening

I think you have no self respect/confidence and weirdly that is the reason your wife keeps cheating on you. Women have zero attraction for a man with no self respect.

Slender good girl? Massive ick.

Slender girl ?