Timeline

[NoSherbert]

How long before you knew you wanted a divorce did you actually get a divorce or seperate?

I have been unhappy for a while now, I can’t see a pleasant future together and have decided I want to divorce but not sure when/how I should do it as it is a bit complicated. He is from a different country and doesn’t have anywhere else to stay, We have 2 young children plus I’m just a bit anxious about the whole thing. Any advice would be appreciated

5 years.

From absolutely deciding it to me moving out was 10 months, with two attempts to leave in that time. Divorce likely to be finalised next month if consent order approved which will be 17mths after leaving. However, I think I knew it was heading that way five years before it.

I kind of knew on my wedding day I was making a mistake. My Dad asked me if I was sure I wanted to go through with it as he would happily go to the church and tell everyone it was off, and I almost said no (I hated every minute of that day and you can see it in the photos). After that it was 3 years until I ended it.

It took about 3 months from knowing it was over to ex actually leaving my house, and those months were awful. In the end his behaviour dictate he had to leave instantly (violence), though he did end up been homeless for a while. If it had been safe to, I'd have allowed him to stay until he had alternative housings sorted, which would have been 6 months.

I didn't actually get the paperwork sorted until a few months later, as there was just so many other things to sort (I'm full time carer to 2 disabled DC, he has limited supervised contact, so life is pretty intense at the best of times). Devorce is due to be finalised in April, about 16 months after marriage ended.