Backstory :
I’m an immigrant but I am on ILR. My H and DC are British citizens. I came to this country for work. Married my husband and been okay for the past 6 years or so. DC will go to reception this year.
Issue:
I was made redundant last year in March. Before that I was earning c. £70k. Since then it’s been a downhill. He keeps calling me dumb and all sorts of names. Barely helps with housework because he says I’m “free”. And it’s not just that he’s soooo lazy. He’s paying for a gym for the last 2 years but hasn’t stepped in for the better part of those years. Must be more than 1 year. He’s massively overweight now (I am too but I eat healthy and exercise). He says if he’s not served food he’ll order it. His credit score is going down because he’s been reckless with his spending. I keep stopping him from buying useless stuff but falls on deaf ears. I don’t think the money problem was that bad when I was working because he had more money to spend as we shared expenses.
I have been struggling with housework , finding a job, childcare and studying for a certificate. No amount of communication is helping. His work is hybrid and goes 2 days a week and I get up early to get DC ready for nursery so he can drop off. DC goes only 3 days to nursery. Even then he finds reason to call me dumb.
I have some savings but don’t know how to proceed. I have no family in this country. He has lawyers in his family who are based in London. And he’s pointed out before that if worse case comes he and his family will make sure DC does not go with me. I have loads of issues with his family in the past and I’m on low contact and no contact with most of them. He says he’s supported me but says can’t breakup with his family just because they said some threats to me.
Anyway my DC is more attached to the dad than to me. For all of that reason I don’t want to go back to my home country as I will be forever separated from my DC.
Thanks for reading a very long post. How do I proceed?