Selling house - Ex refusing to accept offer

[Nimbus1999]

We both agree we need to sell family home. Both signed the forms to appoint the real estate agent.

I pay the full mortgage and ex doesn’t contribute, he moved out 2 years ago but has only just provided a Form E.

We received a full asking price offer from a buyer in a very good position. I’m over the moon and am happy to accept the offer - the current mortgage is crippling me and the kids.

Deadly silence from the ex though - he has not confirmed one way or the other.

It’s been 5 days now and nothing. Worried about losing the buyer.

What can I do? Nothing I assume? We are joint owners.

It would be madness to turn the offer down - we’ve no other viewings arranged and it’s been very quiet since the initial flurry of interest.

Help!

Legally, I’m not sure that you can do anything.

Practically, I’d call him up and ask why he hasn’t signed it and go from there.

Id also probably make it very very clear at what point I would stop paying all of a joint mortgage.

He doesn’t care if I stop paying the mortgage - he’d be over the moon as already said he is waiting for me to default. He wants me to rent.

However, I have a mortgage arranged, full time job and don’t want to mess up my credit. He is not buying again.

He will not discuss the offer with me and I suspect the more desperate I seem, the more he will delay things.

Legally though we both have to accept right?

Definitely don’t stop paying the mortgage, you’ll affect your credit rating.

Why isn’t the EA chasing him for a reply? I’d use them as a first port of call - they should be able to communicate you are happy with the offer but legally your ex has to approve. Any good buyer will understand.

sorry you are having such issues, that is added stress you don’t need.

The EA has tried but he doesn’t return calls or respond to emails.

Will just have to get her to keep trying.

If the house is in joint names, isn't the mortgage also? In which case, any default is going to impact him too.

@Nimbus1999 i’m actually not sure at this point whether or not he has to approve the offer. If it is at the asking and he signed the EA paperwork, I think you probably could. I’d focus more on the exchange and completion paperwork.

He sounds like a real charmer! At least now you won’t be having regrets about divorcing him!

I would also speak to a solicitor. You might have some legal route you could take considering his behaviour.

Yes a default would impact him too. But at this stage, he doesn’t seem to care. He has no intention of buying (he can’t, left his job and has a loss making business) so I guess he is not thinking about mortgages right now. Madness.

Can you get a male representative or a ‘director’ to call him? He sounds like he needs to ‘deal’ with a man. What a knob.

You need legal advice on get a court order to force him to comply. Here is done general advice but you need specific advice for your circumstances: https://www.diemlegal.co.uk/court-order-force-sale-joint-property/

I bought a house from a separated couple where the man had agreed to put the house on the market but kept ignoring or refusing asking price offers for 12-18 months.

His ex partner had to go to court to force a sale in the end.

He was a vile man and I'm sure he was using house to try and control her and make her suffer financially- he knew she was living with her parents and could not buy her own place and move on until the house was sold.

Even after the sale was forced, he delayed and obstructed all the paperwork. But we got there eventually!

Not wanting to scare you but just making you aware there is a legal route if needed.

In my consent order when I divorced ex it stated that house had to be sold by a certain date. Is there nothing in your papers? If not get a solicitor to write to him. Should explain if it ends up in court that judge will decide what is in kids best interests / clearly selling a house that their mum can't afford. Sorry your ex is being such an arse.

He's going to wreak havoc at every stage in the process. Can you get his name off the mortgage first, before selling?

i assume they don’t have any court orders. If this is the case nothing can be done until court. Probably premature to market the house and split anything if nothing has been agreed. I think in this case they were refused mediation. It is acrimonious and selling now isn’t recommended.

If he is seeking legal advice it will take time and it will probably say don’t sell and don’t split the proceeds.

it is a risk to sell and split equity and usually something done when you are both cooperating and in agreement. Even then it’s not recommended.

What was agreed about the equity split?

My ex and I couldn't agree the % involved (pensions were still not valued in our case) so we signed a minute of agreement so that the capital couldn't get released until we were further down the negotiation road.

That way, when the house was on the market, neither of us had any reason not to accept a decent offer.

Sad but possibly true. Its worth a shot.

You take it to court and the judge can sign the house sale on his behalf.

I think he may be able to award costs to come out if his share of any equity.

Can’t you accept at this point without him?

Warn him this will happen he will lose money if he doesn't play ball

Equity split has not been agreed yet but we have both completed Form E’s and due in court next month. I’m hoping we can hash something out and get it all finalised, as in both of our interests. Probably being too optimistic though. I don’t feel we’re a million miles away - the whole process has not even got off the ground as he has refused financial disclosure to date.

No solicitors invoked as representing ourselves but I will definitely ask the judge to see if anything can be done. Just worry that we will lose the offer by then.

I’ll talk to the agent to see if I can accept without him but I fear not.

Unfortunately, this sort of thing happens a lot in divorce.

One half of a couple I know refused an offer when house prices were strong and a year later they can't get a buyer at £100k less; it's shit.

Do you have any mutual friends?

Would it upset him if you told your mutual friends that your ex is clearly desperate to get back together and live together because he's refusing to sell the house and commit to the divorce?

Sounds ridiculous, but his pride may make him "prove" otherwise by accepting the offer?

With men like this, they don't behave logically or decently I'm afraid.

At least you can include needing the house sale to be signed off at court.

I think it would be wise for you to invest in paying to see a solicitor enquire about them being paid out from house sale.

Can you text him asking him to agree the sale at full asking price and suggest money held so none of you can access it until percent split agreed. He may be worried you will get a larger share.

OP, I can understand why you are hoping things get settled in court. But there is a probable risk it won’t get sorted quickly. If it doesn’t and the sale proceeds you might not get access to the capital until you have agreed a split. This could create a lot of problems for you.

1. you are forced into rented accommodation
2. once in rented your housing needs could be considered as being met - undermining your arguments for more equity
3. you are giving him more and more leverage that will force you to settle because time won’t be on your side.

There are different risks for him. But without any form of agreement putting the house on the market could just be a way to make your capital liquid. It might not help you buy a new home.

Do not default. It's taken me 6 years to clear a default from my credit file which was not my fault and it's been a horrific time of not getting mortgages, and access only to ridiculous rate credit cards. Not fun.