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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Short marriage no children divorce

155 replies

H90 · 26/03/2024 19:43

Hello,

Sorry for reaching out on here but I am in a bit of a situation and wanted some guidance if possible.

I was in a short marriage around 1 and a half years and my husband decided to file for divorce. We have no children involved. He has since moved out of the property and I am the only person living in it. I am a low earner so he is still paying for the full mortgage payments.

He has multiple property’s bought a long time before we were married. We bought one family home prior to our wedding which we both lived in (for around 20months). We bought the property in joint names and the mortgage is joint also. He paid a large deposit of £110k whilst I did not pay anything towards it.

His income is reasonable of around 50k per year and mine is around 15k per year but I have some health issues where I need time off work and not really much of a mortgage capacity to help me house myself in the future.

What is the best solution for me? Currently I am asking for 60% of the equity in the property which would be around £160k, which would help me with my housing needs for the future. He is not accepting this and has now filed for court.

OP posts:
Grumpsy · 26/03/2024 22:07

H90 · 26/03/2024 22:02

I was living at my parents house. Then moved into the family home once we got married.

I am legally entitled to at least 50% of the equity of the house though, and my solicitor has also confirmed this. I feel like he just left me for no reason, and now I will suffer as I don’t earn much and have no where to go. Morally, I think it’s my right to get what I deserve, and I should be able to house myself once this financial resolution is over.

I need to go through the courts, as he won’t accept my offer of 50-60% equity of the property. I’m sure the courts will see my health, earning capacity and housing needs, so I surely will be entitled at least 50% of the equity. Why should I settle for less?

in a short marriage, such as this I’d have thought it is likely that the equity split will be 50% after he has had his deposit back. Not total equity. So his offer is probably there or there abouts.

OP you do sound grabby, he isn’t responsible for you for the rest of your life because you’ve been married less than 2 years.

WhiteTilesWhiteGrout · 26/03/2024 22:08

FeckOffNowLads · 26/03/2024 21:13

You’re only unhappy because you won’t get enough for what you want. He clearly contributed way more. You’re being grabby.

This! How are you not embarrassed? You are being grabby and unreasonable. Get a better job and pay for yourself.

ByUmberViewer · 26/03/2024 22:08

Whats wrong with your health?

The man married you. He didn't sign up to supporting you for the rest of your natural life should you become ill. Were you ill when you married him?

DanceMumTaxi · 26/03/2024 22:09

But you don’t get married so a man can ‘keep you’ because you can’t work. I don’t see how your earning capacity is your dh problem when there are no children involved. Could you go back to your parent’s house?

lemonsaretheonlyfruit · 26/03/2024 22:12

He may have had his own reasons for leaving the marriage. It can't have been no reason. People do far worse than walk away for no reason.. ie if one person has an affair then it doesn't entitle the other to more money however unfair or despicable their actions.

I'm sorry about your health issues but that's not his responsibility now or in the future.

Shinyandnew1 · 26/03/2024 22:13

My issue is with his offer of around 50k, I cannot afford to buy my own property.

Well, why do you think that you should be able to buy your own property after a year of marriage and earning only £15k? A short marriage doesn’t give you a free pass to everything your higher earning ex has. You are still young-time to get earning and on the property ladder if you want that. £50k would give you the start of a deposit.

dimllaishebiaith · 26/03/2024 22:16

Morally, I think it’s my right to get what I deserve, and I should be able to house myself once this financial resolution is over.

I don't think morally means what you think it means

Foxblue · 26/03/2024 22:18

Hold on - 'he left me for no reason'
Anyone is allowed to leave a relationship at any time for any reason they want, even if that's no reason at all, them not wanting to be in a relationship any more is enough. I know that's painful, and he might have acted shitty, but its absolutely not okay to try and financially punish someone for leaving.

I don't even know where to start with you saying 'morally it's your right to get what you deserve'
No, you have a legal right to have assets split fairly, but what's 'fair' is dependent on circumstances.
I don't know what moral code you are going by where you think that morally you are owed more than you put in for such a short marriage, where (unless there's a drip feed coming) you reduced paid work to support a business he owned, or dependents he has - If you were still living with your parents before you bought the house why didn't you have any money to put into the deposit? Aren't you ashamed, to try and take so much more than you put in???

Laalaland · 26/03/2024 22:19

Morally, I think it’s my right to get what I deserve, and I should be able to house myself once this financial resolution is over.

But you weren't able to house yourself before you got married.

EasterBunnny · 26/03/2024 22:19

OP you’re thinking may be the case if you had a 30 year marriage.

H90 · 26/03/2024 22:31

Foxblue · 26/03/2024 22:18

Hold on - 'he left me for no reason'
Anyone is allowed to leave a relationship at any time for any reason they want, even if that's no reason at all, them not wanting to be in a relationship any more is enough. I know that's painful, and he might have acted shitty, but its absolutely not okay to try and financially punish someone for leaving.

I don't even know where to start with you saying 'morally it's your right to get what you deserve'
No, you have a legal right to have assets split fairly, but what's 'fair' is dependent on circumstances.
I don't know what moral code you are going by where you think that morally you are owed more than you put in for such a short marriage, where (unless there's a drip feed coming) you reduced paid work to support a business he owned, or dependents he has - If you were still living with your parents before you bought the house why didn't you have any money to put into the deposit? Aren't you ashamed, to try and take so much more than you put in???

I understand where you are coming from, but my views are different. No, I haven’t been involved in any of his business nor does he have other dependents. I didn’t work much before I got married, so don’t have much savings to my name. I currently work 4 days a week because my health is bad. I won’t go back home for several reasons, especially as I got married I decided to move forward with my life and won’t return back to my parents.

You are right, what I meant was my legal entitlement. My name is on the property deeds and on the mortgage! I always bought groceries and other things whilst married and living together with him. He wants the house back but I am not willing to move out until this is resolved. If it has to go to court to get my fair share, then so be it. Why should I feel ashamed when I married in good faith and he has now left me? The solicitor I have spoken to has confirmed my legal entitlement, so why should I not fight for minimum 50% of the equity?? It’s my legal right.

OP posts:
Scarletttulips · 26/03/2024 22:35

OP the house was brought during your marriage so you are right that it forms part of the marriage.

He agreed to pay the mortgage on behalf of both of you.

The law is clear on this. Moral doesn’t come I to the law because it can’t cover all eventualities.

He made a choice to share assets.

ByUmberViewer · 26/03/2024 22:35

The solicitor I have spoken to has confirmed my legal entitlement, so why should I not fight for minimum 50% of the equity?? It’s my legal right.

You're not legally entitled to 50% of the equity. I think you've misunderstood, or misinterpreted what your solicitor said.

millymollymoomoo · 26/03/2024 22:38

Actually you are not entitled to 50% if the house. You are entitled to a fair share in the eyes of the law- which can mean more or less - and in this case mostly will mean mean a lot less

millymollymoomoo · 26/03/2024 22:40

Your sense of entitlement is beyond belief - hopefully he will absolutely win his case and you’ll get next to nothing

H90 · 26/03/2024 22:41

Scarletttulips · 26/03/2024 22:35

OP the house was brought during your marriage so you are right that it forms part of the marriage.

He agreed to pay the mortgage on behalf of both of you.

The law is clear on this. Moral doesn’t come I to the law because it can’t cover all eventualities.

He made a choice to share assets.

Thank you! It was actually bought before the marriage in both names. My legal right should be 50% of the equity, regardless of who paid what, which should result in around 150k. This will allow me to purchase a property in the future and move on with my life.

Also considering my ill health, low income I probably won’t be able to get a mortgage. In legal terms the solicitor explained we should fight for 50% minimum. The decision I need to make now is whether I get a solicitor to fight this for me or I self represent..

OP posts:
lemonsaretheonlyfruit · 26/03/2024 22:43

@H90

Just to clarify (sorry if I have misunderstood) .. are you including 50% of the deposit that he put in as money you are entitled to?

Shinyandnew1 · 26/03/2024 22:44

Also considering my ill health, low income I probably won’t be able to get a mortgage

That is not your husband’s responsibility to fix. I suspect you are going to spend a lot of money on solicitor fees and be very disappointed with what you are left with here.

H90 · 26/03/2024 22:49

Hi - the solicitor clearly stated a needs argument will usually trump a contributions argument as the parties needs will be the Courts paramount consideration. Housing needs for both parties will be the considered first and we can both house ourselves in a small one bedroom flat costing £150k each. I think that seems fair.. also if you were in my shoes you would understand how it feels thinking I might be left homeless.

OP posts:
millymollymoomoo · 26/03/2024 22:49

You do not have a legal right to 50% of the equity irrespective of who paid what. You are very much mistaken !

MrsTerryPratchett · 26/03/2024 22:50

dimllaishebiaith · 26/03/2024 22:16

Morally, I think it’s my right to get what I deserve, and I should be able to house myself once this financial resolution is over.

I don't think morally means what you think it means

I'm normally #TeamWomen but I agree that OP is behaving dreadfully.

I'd be very embarrassed to fleece someone like this. If he'd been violent or even cheated, maybe anger could make you feel more like this. But just, "I want something so I deserve it" is very odd.

ByUmberViewer · 26/03/2024 22:50

Shinyandnew1 · 26/03/2024 22:44

Also considering my ill health, low income I probably won’t be able to get a mortgage

That is not your husband’s responsibility to fix. I suspect you are going to spend a lot of money on solicitor fees and be very disappointed with what you are left with here.

I suspect that too @Shinyandnew1

H90 · 26/03/2024 22:50

millymollymoomoo · 26/03/2024 22:38

Actually you are not entitled to 50% if the house. You are entitled to a fair share in the eyes of the law- which can mean more or less - and in this case mostly will mean mean a lot less

Hi - the solicitor clearly stated a needs argument will usually trump a contributions argument as the parties needs will be the Courts paramount consideration. Housing needs for both parties will be the considered first and we can both house ourselves in a small one bedroom flat costing £150k each. I think that seems fair.. also if you were in my shoes you would understand how it feels thinking I might be left homeless.

OP posts:
millymollymoomoo · 26/03/2024 22:51

This reply has been deleted

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FFSNorman · 26/03/2024 22:52

You wanting to buy a house is not something that is relevant to the divorce. 50% applies for longer lasting marriages SOMETIMES but in your case, barely any time and no dependents, I’m afraid it’s not his problem, and the courts will agree. Getting married doesn’t mean being responsible for the other person forever, regardless of the disparity in incomes.

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