What to do next

[Augustine22]

Hi, I'm in a difficult situation. I have been thinking things through for a long time and I have finally told DH that I want a divorce. He is not happy and wishes we tried again. He says he wants time to process. I am certain I want to leave. He says he is not leaving our rented property and that I can get out. We have children. What do I do? Do I file for divorce and then rent elsewhere? Do I move out and then file for divorce? Would leaving the current home with the children be considered some sort of abduction? Should he not be the one to leave the house as that is our children's home? I want to co-parent but want my children with me during the week, even if he takes them during the day. Just looking for some practical advice of what needs to be done. DH is not going to make it easy, he can be quite argumentative. Thanks.

Tbh I think in some ways what he is asking is fair

from his perspective you’ve just told him you want to split ( he doesn’t) yet you exit t him to immediately lose his home and move away from his children. Why should he?

ultimately you’ll need to sit down and discuss these things. What if he wants 50:50 residency? You say you want your children with you … i expect he feels the same

millymollymoomoo yes I guess although he knew this was coming this has shaken him up.

Can I leave the house before the divorce comes through? And if I leave because he is being difficult and does not discuss things, does that cause any issue with the law? He will have access to the children in this case and I will still try to sort things out but live separately. Is this possible?