I don't want to pay CM anymore

[TuesdaySmoozday]

Right, straight to the point. I don't want to pay CM anymore. I just think I'm being mugged off. Why am I putting up with this?

Currently use direct pay. No court orders or court arrangements. I'm dad. 2 children. Currently 11 and 13.

Split parenting is as follows and is over a 2 week schedule.

I do school pick up on Mondays and they stay overnight.
Drop off at school Tuesday morning.
Have 1 of the children also on a Tuesday night.
School pick up Friday.
Have them until Sat lunchtime
Same again on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Friday the next week.
And then have them all weekend and drop them at school on Monday.

Over 2 weeks that's 6 nights with me, 8 with mum. Plus the 1 night extra where 1 stays with me.
So 1 child is 7 nights with each parent.
Other child is with mum 1 extra night.

We both contribute equally for their clothes, shoes, coats, school bags, school equipment, school trips. This is all amicable and are both fair about it all. We both deal with doctor, dentists, hospital visits, school appointments etc..
Mum normally buys school uniform and school shoes.
Mum receives child benefit.

She is currently a SAHM. She has a partner who works.

I pay £400pm. Annual letter from CMS says this is based on 2 to 3 nights a week. I've rang them and said this is not correct but they basically said they don't believe me and the person who opened the case is the only 1 who can change it, I.e my ex.

I paid this for the last 6 years.

It just doesn't feel fair. What can I do about it?

Or am I missing the point of CM?

@TracyMosby

Id one child is with you more, can you not out in a cm claim for that child?

He wouldn't get anything as his ex does not work.

I wouldn’t begrudge paying that for my own children.

Have you actually read the OP?

He wouldn't get anything as his ex does not work
Would he not get the child benefit? And surely he wouldnt have to pay for that child either.

Crikey those poor kids are backwards & forwards like Yo-yos. Children need a main base. A place to call home. Not being dragged backwards & forwards to the most confusing schedule ever, just because their parents aren't together anymore

Surely it would be easier to just do one week at one parent's home, the next week at the other?

@TracyMosby

He wouldn't get anything as his ex does not work Would he not get the child benefit? And surely he wouldnt have to pay for that child either.

In theory yes but he'd have to prove he has that child more, and ime they don't believe men.

Again, he wouldn't but he has to convince the CMS who again generally don't belueve men.

@GrannytoaUnicorn

Crikey those poor kids are backwards & forwards like Yo-yos. Children need a main base. A place to call home. Not being dragged backwards & forwards to the most confusing schedule ever, just because their parents aren't together anymore

Surely it would be easier to just do one week at one parent's home, the next week at the other?

Op says this has been the case for years. It must work for them. What makes you think you know better?

In your scenario £400 a month does seem excessive yes.

Hmm, maybe your ex should think about getting a job now the dc are so old?

@COVIDandCats

Also, every time my husband phoned them, they'd give him a different explanation for their assessment.

Half the people working there could barely string a sentence together, and their math skills were appalling.

I imagine that most of the CMS's workers are people who wanted to get into the civil service but were too stupid for the tax office.

Oh god yes. This this and this. The CMS are a joke.

@PeeAche

HMRC are pretty bloody awful so I can't even begin to imagine how bad the CMS are going to be to deal with!