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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Ex breaking lockdown rules - can I do anything?

5 replies

Whatonearth2020 · 16/11/2020 16:27

So yesterday DS and I saw ex (left in July, still married) walking up from the station with a back pack. He had not been available to look after kids the day before. I asked him about it and he said he did a nearly 2 hr train journey to go running with his friend, showered at his house and came home.

He said he didn’t realise this was breaking lockdown even though he is on the committee for safety at his work.

He said I was picking a fight, etc etc. Didn’t need my permission etc. He cheated a year ago which was the start of the end, and I admit that part of me is terrified that he’s seeing someone else, even though I know it’s not my business.

So I’m unsure / as I have 3 DC and elderly ill parents, do I have any right to ask him about breaking lockdown? He has DC one night per week and EOW. Should we tell each other if we are in a bubble with someone?

OP posts:
HosannainExcelSheets · 16/11/2020 16:58

I'd let it go. If your DC are in school or nursery then one more person that your ex may or may not be seeing is not really a big deal.

Changedmynameagain1 · 16/11/2020 21:01

Honestly pick your battles, maybe he is in a relationship with someone( his bubble) and doesn’t want to tell you yet... personally I’d leave it.

If he does have a bubble it’s none of your business.

GentlemanJay · 18/11/2020 19:16

Bigger battles to fight than this. Let it go.

MiaGracie · 18/11/2020 20:23

@Whatonearth2020 he will simply lie if he doesn't want you to know.
And it may even feel like he's being honest but isn't.
Secondly as much as you want to know, hate the feeling of the unknown ( I totally understand) you may not actually be ready for the truth or how it comes about.

The best thing I do, it to constantly remind myself that I can only control what I do, how I parent, and that whatever they say or do it isn't my business! It's hard.
But just block it constantly in your mind for your own say. Don't let it sit in tour head for more that a moment and when you feel like your gonna lose it- remember he isn't the one, he's a dirty cheat and you can rant here .

ArnoldBee · 18/11/2020 20:34

So you are allowed to meet one person outside for exercise but the train journey isn't technically in the rules. To be honest the rules are quite contradictory anyway and I would prefer that people are generally sensible.
For example before November 5th we would go to the pub but sit outside away from other people. At least with his honesty you can assess the risk.

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