Posted here before. I keep reading your guys stories and comparing them to mine. I notice one thing- i feel no hesitation or heartache. That’s different from what i see here hence my thread.
Am i heartless bitch for looking forward to it. I had 10 years of being put through porn addiction, efforts to make it work with Relate sessions, disinterest in me and little help around the house. Strip clubs when first was born and detachment from his side. No intimacy for 5 years, in fact i could still count times we had sex in those 10 years on my fingers.
I know kids will be affected but i’m full of positivity that with new energy and having shed of constant downer that is my marriage i will forge us a better future. I look forward to me and kids healing from low level hurt that’s happening every day. It’s almost like I have a tunnel vision and i see the light at the end of it, regardless of short term difficulties we will all face. I hope to show my kids there is a better way of living albeit not in the standard family unit anymore. My kids are 11 and 6.
Is this unusual? Mind you, i had many years to get to this state of mind. Thought of separating was hurting before but it doesn’t anymore. Anyone else can relate?..