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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

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Original poster

Learnt to cut the grass!!! What's your equivalent?

62 replies

PicaK · 06/05/2020 10:44

I know, it's such a small thing really but yesterday I felt like I'd climbed a mountain.
The grass had been growing and growing. He kept offering to cut it for me but then didn't for 1 genuine reason or another.
We'd got so divided in our roles/ responsibilities - it was something I'd not done before. (I did do all the life/finance admin and I know he's been slowly getting used to that too.)
Just got that feeling its going to be OK on my own for the first time.
When did that happen for others and were they big things or small things (like mine) that prompted it?

OP posts:

lastburritos · 06/05/2020 10:47

Doing the food shop on my own and being able to buy exactly what I wanted to eat. He did all the shopping and cooking when we were together. Sounds great but it was a total control thing. I still love meal planning years later!

thistooshallpass2018 · 06/05/2020 19:31

Put pressure back into the boiler lol

inisfree · 06/05/2020 20:29

Power washed the patio

ChittyChittyBoomBoom · 06/05/2020 23:05

Sanded and repainted the shed (then mowed the lawn).

I felt so empowered!

Mindmedley · 06/05/2020 23:54

Got my first tool kit

TheUnquestionedAnswer · 07/05/2020 00:02

I actually put my mower together from scratch!! I still cannot bear to use the trimmer though, after 7 years single. I can, however, use the hedge trimmer, as the height is manageable. I love living on my own without at man .

Vintagevixen · 07/05/2020 21:16

Managed to remove the transport bolts from the back of my new washing machine then plumb it in, It's quite simple really, but it felt amazing.

ComeOnGordon · 07/05/2020 21:20

I love this thread. It’s such a great feeling to realise you can do things that you have never done before.

For me it was setting the fire - he always made such a big fuss about it and spent ages cleaning it every time we used it that I stopped asking him to do it. Now I have it on lots and clean it when it looks like it needs a clean. And another vote for power washing the patio - so satisfying

sobersides · 07/05/2020 23:56

I bought a drill last month. So far I have set wiring on garage wall for wisteria, hung all mirrors and pictures that have been sat in the garage since we moved in 2 years ago and today I built a dog ramp out of his dismantled bedside unit. Why the feck I waited for him to do it I'll never know.

PrincessButtercuppp · 08/05/2020 08:22

I love this thread! One of the things I did was get a handle of all the finances, cut all the waste (Sky 100+ vs Netflix £6! for eg) and realised I could do this! I mowed the lawn and put pictures up etc and it makes you feel so good.

Grandadwasthatyou · 08/05/2020 08:25

Cut the grass, painted fence, wish I knew how to change the printer inks. Pathetic I know!

AuntieMarys · 08/05/2020 08:26

Switching utilities...saved £1500 a year .

toomuchlikemyusername · 08/05/2020 08:34

I started to buy real Christmas trees. They had always been vetoed on the basis that we had a perfectly good artificial one that had years left in it.

That first year, I had the biggest, most lovely real tree I could find and it was glorious.

It was also a real bastard to transport and put up but I did that too, even though there was a lot of sweating and swearing involved. But he didn't get to see that bit, only my beautiful tree when he came to pick the children up one evening and he was all

TolstoyAteMyHamster · 08/05/2020 08:35

Organising the car service/MOT/insurance
Putting together a flat pack desk
Putting up shelves with an electric drill
Unblocking the sink

I’d love to think he’s learned to buy gifts for his family, sew on buttons and plan a holiday. Somehow I doubt it.

toomuchlikemyusername · 08/05/2020 08:39

Grandadwasthatyou printer inks are usually relatively straightforward if it's a pretty simple printer. Usually involves opening a flap at the lower front of the printer and the print cartridges should be visible. You have to click them out' usually by giving them a gentle pull up and out, and then replace with a new one in the same orientation. They often have to go in at a slight angle and then click down into place with a bit of a press. If the cartridges aren't visible, you may need to power up the printer to get them to move to the centre of the opening and be visible.
You can do this!!

Vintagevixen · 08/05/2020 12:49

I need to tackle the printer ink next too!

May I add, to keep the thread going as it definitely is such a fab thread, ordered the style of fridge I had always wanted but was never allowed, spilled a drop of tea on the floor without it being an unforgivable sin, not having to listen to the news seventy billion times a day, not watching Andrew fucking Marr on a Saturday morning, bed sheets stay cleaner much longer, the heating on when I want it on and not just being told to put an extra jumper on.

There are probably more 😂😂 that I will think of and be back to tell you all. In the meantime I will be off to my new fridge to get some ice from my ice dispenser! 😁😁

StuckBetweenDarknessAndLight · 08/05/2020 13:09

The first night in my new place I put together my bed which the instructions said were a 2 man job. Sheer bloody mindedness but I felt invincible. Then I decorated the kitchen and designed my bathroom. It’s all mine now!

Grandadwasthatyou · 08/05/2020 17:45

Am so inspired by all you posters tackling jobs. The only thing I miss him for is all these little jobs around the house which are driving me mad.
I dread changing the bed now as it's super king size and I struggle with lifting the corners of the heavy mattress to get the fitted sheet on and don't even go there with the quilt cover.

Under the settee will be filthy but it's a large corner suite and really needs 2 people to pull it away from wall to get the hoover underneath.
It's daunting when you realise you've just let him get on with all these tasks and now you don't know how to do them.

Thanks for tip re printer ink though.

isthismylifenow · 08/05/2020 18:05

I redid both my bathrooms. OK I didn't actually do the tiling etc but bought all the fittings, tiles, and everything that was needed and the plumber just fitted it. It was a huge step for me as I would usually always doubt myself.

okiedokieme · 09/05/2020 19:01

I pumped the tyres on the car, first time ever

newtb · 09/05/2020 19:28

Changed the gas bottle on the hob (but it lasts over a year, so have to check on YouTube).

No grass to mow - he took the mower anyway.

crocoonimper · 09/05/2020 23:22

Love this! Myself and the kids painted the two old picnic tables we had had for years - he decided that he would then ask for one as I had them both (he showed no interest before). I said no as I love them now and he backed down. Felt SOO good.

GlassOfProsecco · 10/05/2020 11:20

Fixed the chain on my bike & did I basic bike repair - I had to google & learn by watching on You-tube.

My ex is effing useless. I did all the DIY, tyre pressures/car wash/decorating, took bins out.

The only thing he did was the garden, which was a hobby & he enjoyed.

HeartS0ul20 · 12/05/2020 10:36

I've always cut the grass

I think it's like hoovering, but more enjoyable, because it's normally outside on a sunny day

Monstermuncher · 12/05/2020 10:51

I got over my fear of using the hedge trimmer and it felt fantastic (hedge looked slightly wonky but at least it was my own work) I'm starting to do some small diy tasks too - baby steps but its all progress - keep up the good work everyone

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