Dear All,
I am a long term mumsnet user and get lots of helpful advice from reading these threads. Please can someone help me with this?
My ex-husband and I are divorced (decree absolute May 16).
We have 2 children aged 9 and 11, whom we have equal care of (7 nights in each fortnight on a rolling schedule).
Until last week he had been paying me £180 a month maintenance as his salary was significantly higher than mine.
This was agreed in a family based arrangement through mediation and was signed by the courts when we divorced. I am in receipt of the child benefit.
In May he handed in his resignation without telling me(I found out through a mutual friend). He had a well paid job and resigned voluntarily without having a job to go to.
He has now emailed to tell me that he expects me to pay him maintenance as he claims he is now the receiving parent.
I told him that he left his job through his own choice and cannot expect me to suddenly pay for that.
His emails since Friday have become increasingly threatening, saying I am being unreasonable and causing a major problem that will impact negatively on the children. He says I am being disruptive and show no understanding for his situation.
He has a history of abusing me emotionally, calling me misogynistic words in front of our children, bullying behaviours and sarcastic language. I find it impossible to speak to him properly as he I find him threatening and intimidating.
I am terrified that I do owe him money now, even though I spoke to the Child Maintenance Options helpline, who told me that as I am in the receipt of child benefit, I am classed as the receiving parent, not him.
The adviser also said that if he were to lodge a claim via the CMS, he couldn't, as he's not in receipt of the child benefit. plus they would judge that neither of us owe the other maintenance, as the care in shared equally.
I am terrified he will try to wrangle the child benefit off me somehow.
In the context of the past emotional abuse, any goodwill I may have had towards him has evaporated. He has the ability to twist my reality.
He is remarried, but in the process of an acrimonious divorce from his 2nd wife after a very short marriage.
I live with my new partner and our children when they are with us.
Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you.
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Divorce/separation
Ex husband leaves job and expects me to pay him maintenance. Help please.
38 replies
kakiqueen · 11/09/2017 11:08
OP posts:
Smeaton ·
11/09/2017 13:31
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
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