Advice needed, don't know where to start

[Sparrowlegs248]

Married 4 years, together 15. 2 children under 2.

Joint mortgage. I'm on maternity leave. He's self employed.

I can't carry on with his behaviour. He is abusive, aggressive, negative, critical.

But I don't know where to start. I'd like him to leave, so that I can work out what I'd like to do. I don't know if I want to try and stay in the house or not. I know I can't make him leave though, and I don't think he will voluntarily.

I don't have any money for legal advice. I don't think I'd qualify for legal aid as although his behaviour is abusive, he's not been violent towards me. Also, I don't want to inflame the situation by 'claiming abuse'

I really don't know what to do. Or where to start. I can't imagine living here with him while it all goes on. Not with the children. He's so unpleasant, the atmosphere will be horrendous.

Does he have anywhere he can stay short term

I was in this situation 14 years ago - I went through hell for months but stuck with him because I didn't know what else to do. I really regret it now, looking back.Everytime things were hard he reverted to type. My health deteriorated and two years ago he left for someone else. I have now met someone who really loves me but I bear so many emotional scars. Every relationship is diferent but I really wish I had looked propperly into the options. Free advice can be had from citizens advice/ free 1st half hour with a family solicitor/ talking therapy through gp....good luck x

Also - with regards to legal aid - it no longer covers divorce but you can get it for mediation if you qualify.