maintenance

[rosyleigh]

Court order from 3 years ago, XH should send me P60 every May and if any increases CM payments amended accordingly. It's a complete pain and I have to chase each year and even then he refuses to increase and has told me as such, not worth taking him to court over a couple of pounds. He has started a new job, had a promotion and wages (according to the scanned copy of his P60) remain relatively unchanged. He works in finance and is a snake, would do anything to not pay us anything, let alone an increase.
I know he will just ignore any of my emails if I chase for P60 and to save all the hassle of chasing each year I think it would be easier just to do it through the CSA or whatever they are called now. How do I do this?

Phone them up

Pisssssedofff.....phone them up? Really not a helpful answer is it?? They really dont give a flying f@*k, tbh. I have been chasing them about my stbxh and him possibly contributing towards his 3 kids now for nearly a year. Its a joke. They havent been able to get hold of him (he won't answer their phone calls or reply to letters) so guess what they do...??? Oh yeah, Jack. Nada....nothing. oh well never mind hey. I've given up with the idea that the man i married and whom fathered my children would actually be a decent human being and want to, voluntarily, help raise his children by providing or even slightly contributing towards their upbringing. He has given me a total of £20 over 2 yrs. ...its shameful, embarrassing and unjust. But, if he can live with himself. ....sobeit. im proud of the fact that struggle but still do so, BY MYSELF. Even though i have to supply everything when they stay with him for a couple of days because he simply 'cannot afford it". Whereas, he clearly thinks i can!? So please dont put stupid thoughtless comments on posts that are clearly frustrated people, trying to do their best by their kids. ...and asking the opinion of others because theyre starting to self doubt.

However frustrated you obviously are Sammy, the answer to the OP's question really is "phone them up".

OP, I use CMS. You have an address for your ex so the claim itself should be fairly straightforward. Worth a think though...if he's a financial whizz, they may end up with the same figures he provides you.

Right.

Two options then sammy, suck it up or give him the kids.
The CMS were great with me, still having issues with him but

Is he paying you CMS mimimum ? if so consider is he self employed?

Not sure how old DC is but if you are getting regular payments..Unless he gets big payrise unlikely to change much..

CMS are not great and if it is a few pounds may be worth leaving it.

I have phoned CMS....several times. They cannot get hold of him with his address or phone number.

Yes I'm frustrated. But I've totally given up in this area now. They don't actually do much. ..and no, they aren't really bothered. It's fine pisssssedofff. ..I have 'sucked it up' for the last couple of years. And I have now been trying to move on knowing that I am the sole provider for my children and its his problem and ignorance to decide not to help with his 3 children's upbringing
I am proud of what I'm achieving tbh!

Starry new. ..dc's are 9, 8 and 2. ...and no he doesnt/hasn't ever paid any kind of maintenance whatsoever.. in the 2 yrs we have been separated ....nor the 3 out of the ten yrs beforehand.

But thanks to those with actual constructive comments.....as for the others..? Maybe u should actually think/use ur brain b4 putting comments on posts that will only offend/upset people? Just a thought.....

As for give him the kids. ...? He struggles to look after them for the 2 days every other wk that he does have them. I never, ever thought that after ten yrs, marriage, 3 kids together that it would ever end up this way. But unfortunately. ..these things happen and sometimes it's not just as simple as you think. ...
All I was stating is that I have had nothing but uselessness from the CMS and I know a few others that had an equally unjust response from them.

I feel that people are screwed over alot by the other parent (father or mother).

Just wish there was more (obvious) help for struggling parents to be able to get easy access to advice and help out there. ..

Sammy I hear you mine has dwindled me out of the house. Only just started paying child support and his response to that was to apply for 50/50 so he doesn't have to.