Should I make a new will?

[northangerabbey]

I'm in the middle of divorce proceedings having separated from STBX 2.5 years ago. I'm now with my DP and we're planning to buy a house together soon but no plans to marry. I would want to make sure my kids were looked after (STBX now lives in UAE on a 5 yr contract and has hardly any access). I'd proably arrange for my DSis to look after them if I die.

Will my dp be next of kin and therefore inherit everything if I don't make a will? If not, can I just write a letter making him NOK? At the moment my will gives everything to STBX but I know that will be cancelled when we get the divorce through.

You'll definitely need a will if you are not married.

No. If you die without a will the intestacy rules apply and non-marital partners do not get anything. NOK is a pretty nebulous concept in UK, and writing a letter about it won'tl make any difference at all.

You need to specify preferred guardianship for DC, if not the authorities will decide.

Your assets will to to your blood family, divided according to rules. If your divorce is not completed, STBX would also stand to inherit.

You really do need a Will.

You really should make a will, for two reasons:

1. Your partner may not inherit anything from you automatically if you don't have a will. If you buy your new property as tenants in common, then he won't, but if you buy it as joint tenants and one of you dies, the survivor of you automatically inherits it all. That may in itself be a problem, though, as presumably you'd want to make sure your children inherit from you. If the house is your only or main asset, then your partner could easily gift it to someone else in his own will (or, of course simply sell it and keep the proceeds).

1. If your children's father is unable to care for them, it would be sensible to appoint a guardian. The guardianship clause would have to be clear about the circumstances and your specific wishes, eg if he came back to the UK and could look after them, would you be happy for the guardian appointment to lapse?

In your circumstances, it would certainly be sensible to buy the property as tenants in common and then grant each other a life interest, or a shorter right to reside so that your children received their inheritance at a reasonable age. This type of trust would also cover who pays for the maintenance of the house, insurance, etc. Obviously a lot depends on what each of you is contributing to the purchase and future mortgage payments etc.

I'm a will writer and qualified lawyer and have a paid for advert over on the Classified Small Business Section of Mumsnet if you'd like any further info.

The ad is titled, "Marlow Wills: 5 Will Writing Service Recommended by Mumsnetters and of course there's no obligation to use the service, I'm happy to provide free advice as necessary.

btw if you do want to make a will, it would be a good idea to specifically exclude your husband, just to avoid the possibility of him saying that he was excluded accidentally.

I'd suggest that you add a clause to say that, for the avoidance of doubt, you have specifically excluded your husband as a beneficiary because you are estranged and divorce proceedings are pending.

Thanks Mumblechum, I've emailed you through the Marlow Wills website.

YES!

at Theas18's enthusiasm!

Thanks OP, I'll be in touch to sort out a phone appointment to take place sometime this week - I can do it in the evening if that's more convenient.

Just to say mumblechum is mustard OP!

DeepRedBetty How very kind of you!

Another vote of confidence for mumbles