Do I need to divorce

[sadkaren2]

Hi,
my husband left a few weeks ago for another woman.

He was nice at first (guilty), but is now turning nasty. He has threatened to withdraw all financial support.

For various reasons (I suspect he may be having a mental breakdown) I would rather not seek a divorce for a little while, but need some finances to be in place.

He and I are no longer communicating.

Can I seek a financial settlement without petitioning for divorce please?

If so, how?

Thanks,
karen

You need to see a lawyer ASAP

if he's threatening to withdraw all financial support you need to see a lawyer. Many of them offer a free hour for the basics.

Do you have children? There needs to be maintenance for them at a minimum.

No, no children.

or a judicial separation
(but then you have to go through it all again if and when you do get divorced)

At the moment whilst you are separated, but have not started divorce, you are reliant on his goodwill to continue to provide financial support.

So in these initial stages of separation financial support is informal and voluntary.

If you and he could talk and agree then you could put in place a separation agreement that would make it clearer and more formal what financial support he would provide and what would happen eventually when you divorce to the house and pensions etc.

In cases where agreement is not possible and there is a threat to withdraw financial support then there is not really much you can do without starting divorce.

Its only when you start the divorce and then also apply to court for a financial settlement that you can also ask for something called "maintenance pending suit" which is a monthly payment from him to you that he has to provide as a temporary measure whilst the more permanent financial agreement is being thrashed out.

I reported it a couple of days ago (re the Wikidivorce advertising). Don't hold your breath! Might just put my own contact details on here if it's a free for all!!

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MNHQ