My aunt (82, dementia, physically frail) has been in respite care for four or five weeks and is feeling much better thanks to the care. She's eating properly, taking her meds, etc. The next step is to get her into a permanent residential home nearer family. However, she is adamant that she doesn't need care and can go home. When she was at home, she was living in squalor, not eating, drinking too much, etc. She had carers, briefly, but shouted at them and sent them away. Since moving into the care home, she's eating properly, taking her meds, etc.
She's getting really cross with me about the move to permanent care and I don't know what to do or say. She says she is better now so she should go home. I have never been blunt enough to say 'You have dementia and it's going to get worse', but I'm tempted. However, she will just forget I've said it, so it's pointless, really. And she has no insight into her condition, which I believe is quite common with dementia.
Can the social worker override it if my aunt refuses to go?
Next week, the manager of the prospective care home is visiting to assess her and I know my aunt will tell her she doesn't want to go. What happens then?!
This must be a common problem. How do you deal with it?