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Dadsnet

Speak to new fathers on our Dads forum.

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Original poster

Any men out their with experience of this or any knowledge regarding sperm counts etc?

19 replies

NewMember · 11/10/2009 18:26

My DP and I have now being TTC for 10 months. He just recieved his 2nd sperm analysis result, which was not good. He did not bring home all the figures but reading between the lines his sperm count is very low, he thinks below 1 million. Does anyone have experience of this?

Are our chances of TTC on our own gone? What about ICI or IVF?

He is heartbroken so I am trying to find out as much information as possible.

Really scared

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Original poster

NewMember · 11/10/2009 19:43

Bump

OP posts:

Littlefish · 11/10/2009 20:15

My dh had a very very low sperm count, with poor morphology and motility as well. We were told that ICSI was the only way forward for us.

We gave up alcohol, caffeine, red meat, cow dairy, aspartame, as many preservatives as possible and started doing acupuncture. We were determined that if we had to have IVF, we would make sure that we were in the best possible physical state in order to give any pregnancy its best possible chance.

Finally, after trying for 2 and a half years, the month before we were due to start IVF, I found out I was pregnant, naturally. Dd is now nearly 5 and is our miracle child!

I have an acquaintance who had her first child by ICSI, but then conceived her second child naturally.

Your poor dh will be feeling awful, I know mine really found it hard. All you can do is reassure him that it doesn't change how you feel about him and that you can work through this together.

Good luck.

Littlefish · 11/10/2009 20:16

Forgot to add - we both took lots and lots of vitamins. Have a look at Zita West or Dr Marilyn Glenville. Both have written lots on nutrition and fertility.

Original poster

NewMember · 11/10/2009 20:52

Thank you very much for that. I bought the Zita West book so I will take a look over that. My DP started taking Zinc last week so we will see how that goes.

He has to be referred for other tests so we will see what that bring. I just pray this is not the end - so scared!

OP posts:

Littlefish · 11/10/2009 20:56

It won't be the end. It might just mean a different path.

As I said before, we were told that ICSI was the only way forward, and we still ended up conceiving naturally. It only takes one sperm to go in the right direction, and your dh has about a million

Original poster

NewMember · 11/10/2009 21:11

Thank you, I feel a little better now! Ouch my poor DP is just gutted. I love him with all my heart so it def wont come between us! We just have to remain strong

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Original poster

NewMember · 12/10/2009 17:23

Anyone else?

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Original poster

NewMember · 12/10/2009 21:35

Bump...

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ABetaDad · 12/10/2009 21:58

NewMember - didn't want to let your posts go unanwered.

There was a thread a little while ago I posted on that you might like to read.

ICSI is the way to go and there may even be a specific treatable cause of your DH's low sperm count. He could still father a child and the thing is to get in front of the consultant and start exploring options ASAP. That will help DH psychologically and IVF can take a long time so getting started rather than delaying for no good reason is important.

As for your DH, I am quite sure he is quesioning why you even want to stay with him. He will be thinking and perhaps say some quite illogical things of course. Perhaps even push you away. Just keep loving him as you are.

I went through IVF with DW and although my sperm count was good I do remember the awful sick feeling waiting for the results.
Men never think about their fertility until something like this happens. I know I never did. In the same situation I would be overwhelmed.

This might sound odd BUT it may help him if he can bring himself to be open and talk about with family rather than making it a dreadful secret.

Not sure what else to say but I wish you and DH all the best.

Littlefish · 13/10/2009 09:24

I completely agree ABetaDad.

Although it took him a long time to tell them at first, my dh took great comfort from his friends. They were incredibly supportive once they knew the situation. They were sweet, kind and yet irreverant, all at the same time. When dh gave up drinking, they never tried to sway him, and simply bought him soft drinks without teasing. I will be forever grateful to them for their quiet, unquestionning support for my dh with such a difficult, personal issue.

Littlefish · 13/10/2009 09:25

I forgot to ask you newmember - how old are you and dh?

woowa · 13/10/2009 09:37

my DH has the worst sperm in the world, and i'm now pregnant via ICSI. It was a hard decision to make to do it, but i'm so glad we did as fathering has given him a boost.

Like the others said, your job is to make sure, whether it works or not, that DP knows you aren't with him for his baby-making ability, and that you'll love him whatever happens, and you'll stay with him whatever happens. Sometimes this means making baby-making less central to your life, which I know is SOOOO hard because it's SO painful TTC (we were 4 years with no contraception, 3 years actively TTC), especially when friends and family seem to get pregnant without trying. Putting your relationship above baby-making and thinking about sperm will really help, and trying to think of other things to think about so that he doesn't feel that he's depriving you of a child because of his body. He needs to know that he is enough for you.

I hope you manage to conceive soon.
xx

Littlefish · 13/10/2009 13:20

Good post woowa. I absolutely agree.

Newmember - the other thing we did was to make each appointment at the assisted conception unit an event. We would go somewhere lovely for lunch afterwards, or take time to go for a walk or to the cinema that evening. It was important for us that the whole thing was about us, and not just conception.

Littlefish · 13/10/2009 13:22

Forgot to say congratulations Woowa! Fantastic news! How many weeks are you?

Original poster

NewMember · 13/10/2009 17:12

Thank you so much everyone for taking the time to reply. I really do appreciate it.

My DP is 33 and I am 27 (still fairly young) so hoping this goes for us rather than agains us.

DP is doing much better today, we have decided not to talk about it until we have visited a specialist (so i might come on here and rant a little). DP is the best thing to EVER happen to me, and he knows 100% that I will not allow this to take our our lives or relationship - i just wont allow it.

I know we will be fine if we are told we will concieve a child (one way or another) neither of us can bare the thought of living a life without having children of our own.

I just pray that some of his sperm can be used for IUI or IVF - as I am feeling this might be our only hope!

OP posts:

zazen · 17/12/2009 10:50

New member - I don't want to patronise you but you are both still really young, so there's a lot of hope.

Has your DP had his veins in his scrotum analysed? Sometimes the veins can heat up the scrotum and sperm production drops.

FWIW my DH had less than 5% live sperm with bad morphology and no motility and no longevity - they lasted a few minutes outside his body, couldn't swim and were deformed, and by timing sex (I timed to the minute with ovulation predictor sticks) we conceived our beautiful DD.
We were on a wholefood organic diet for about a year and ate supplements like horse tablets.

DH's sperm were so bad we were refused ICSI and IVF. So our DD really is a miracle. We were ttcing for 36 cycles and I was 35 when I conceived.

It can be done, but the important thing I suppose is that we were giving up on having a baby, and thinking of getting a cat! So we were really relaxed - easier to say than do I know, but I think it also had an effect.

I used Ovulation predictor stix as a kindof wry joke with myself, and then got my lucky knickers on . It worked for us and I hope it works for you.

bwoodhams · 17/12/2009 12:55

Early in the summer I had a sperm test that echoed the results of one I'd had back in 1993/4. My sperm count was stupidly low, and what few sperm there were were either lying around waiting for someone to bring them an ovum on a plate or whizzing around in circles laughing their asses off. Ah, my children. I was told by the doctor that conception would be very difficult.

Literally a month after ditching contraception as a waste of money and effort, my partner was locked and loaded. I don't wish to make light of your DH's plight, but my point is that all is not lost, a low sperm count is far from the end of the story. And it's certainly no reflection on him!

aarghhelp · 22/05/2010 17:32

The same happened to my DH, when we went to see the fertility doctor 3 months later for our next appointment I was pregnant!

Coolfonz · 25/05/2010 19:21

Newmember - It's still a probability thing no? So have sex as often as is physically possible. Get as many sperm up there (not their by the way ) as you can. You aren't old...

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