Ireland is a hard place to live

[Mooshamoo]

Just watching the video of the black child being not given a medal by Irish gymnastics.

I was wondering if there is anyone else on here on craicnet, who is not Irish, living in Ireland. What your experiences are.

I think that Ireland can be a very hard place to live if you are not fully white and fully irish.

I'm half Irish. I was bullied all the way through school for not having an Irish surname. Then when I grew up and lived in the same small town, all of the same girls from my school were living in that town. And as adults they refused to talk to me.

I see the women who are fully Irish, being popular , having great lives.

To be totally acceptable and popular in ireland, you have to have a rich family, brothers/father who play gaa etc.

All the rich girls in my school hung around together. And again as adults all the rich Irish women hung around together in small town Ireland.

If you were foreign, from a single parent family, seen as poor, you were not accepted at all.

And it's who you know

I think this makes Ireland a very difficult place to live

How many kids do you have? Yeah I'm sure it's all busy with kids especially this time of year

Just the one but jaysus it's hard getting into a secondary! The one where i have an advantage is the one that i absolutly wouldn't send her to. It's a nightmare tbh. cries

Good luck with it @Chickenkeev.

Thanks!

I don't know why you're getting such a hard time here @Mooshamoo for facing racism. This thread is a blatant example of victim blaming and victim shaming which indirectly kind of proves your point.
I have friends of Indian origin and if Indian nationality who have lived in Ireland and who have faced racism. Most of them have moved elsewhere; they were highly educated and have skills that are covered all over the world and so it is easy for them to move. So those posters saying you should just move, it's not possible. Also that statement in itself has a racist connotation of "Go back to your own home".

I'm very sorry that happens to you @Mooshamoo, I had the same experience in reverse growing up in England with an obvious Irish name in the 60s and 70s - everyone, school teachers, children, strangers stopping to talk to a little girl and asking her name - all the time, relentless.

Such a relief when we moved to Ireland. I might still get asked where the surname is from because it isn't common in the region I live in, but it's just curiosity (I quite like the tradition of 'tracing' and interest in people's 'home place'), not an instant opportunity for Irish 'jokes' and judgement and mimicking accents and trotting out 'thick paddy' stereotypes. That still happens to some extent when I'm back there visiting - I avoid using my name or speaking with people I don't know just to stop it.

Not much you can do except accept some people in all countries are thick.

Yeah it's hard. But what I find really hard and unfair is that many irish people don't see that this goes on at all.

Because they had a lovely easy life, they do not see that other people have bad lives in Ireland.

Because they are irish, with the right name, life is easy. I look at my Irish friends that I know. They have all sailed through life, with lovely easy lives. I'm happy for them, but sometimes I wonder is it at the expense of others.

Like, they make life easier for themselves by making it worse for others. Youre not accepted unless you have the right family and right name.

There is a hiking group near me. It is invite only on whatsapp. Like the leader adds who she wants to be in the WhatsApp group. It has about fifty people. Every one of the people are white Irish. She never invites Indian, black, mixed race, anyone that is not Irish. Ever. Even though those people love around here.

Moo, yer wan in just a cnut. Nothing to do with you being English.

I just woke up today really crying. I feel like I just can't bear my life in Ireland for a week longer.

I'm in Ireland to help care for other relatives. One is dying.

I know if I leave Ireland, I'll be told by people that I know in Ireland that I'm cruel and heartless for leaving her.

In fact the last time I escaped ireland for a couple of months to go and work abroad, I got loads of texts from people in Ireland saying that I should be ashamed of myself for leaving my sick elderly mother.

There is definitely that attitude amongst some people in Ireland. That the daughter should be at home to care for her parents.

But I'm starting to feel like I just can't bear my life here in Ireland for even a week longer. I'm going to have to put myself first and leave.

My Irish friend moved to Canada. She has a really good job .

She has been there for five years.

She said that every time she comes home to Ireland at Christmas, she is asked by people "when is she coming home to look after her parents". She said that the last time she went home, she was sorry she went home at all. She was built tripped so much to come back.

*guilt tripped

The biggest problem with Ireland is the absolute refusal to accept there are any issues anywhere. Nope, no racism, didn't happen.

Just look at the massive backlash the woman in the wall got from Irish journos, accusations of it misportraying small town ireland (somehow the absolute dross that was the banshees of inisherin film and its jiggidy jiggidy portrayal was praised though, funny that...)

Why don't you just move to the UK OP it has massive problems but at least it is openly tackling issues and challenging itself. Ireland has a weird "fragility" about holding a mirror up to itself

I know if I leave Ireland, I'll be told by people that I know in Ireland that I'm cruel and heartless for leaving her.

Seriously though, fuck them. If you have the means to leave and your mother has alternative care and happy with that then they can bray all they want about you - you'll never need to see or hear from them again.

I do agree that there's some nice parts of Ireland but you seem to have been landed in a particularly awful one. Why would you care what people like them think, what the girls at school used to think. They are all utter nasty narrow minded bigots who will never leave Ballycunt, and live small miserable lives.

I'd wonder how much of a dickhead I was if people like that liked me so I'd actually take their opinion of me as an indication that I'm doing something right.

@Turfwars
Ballycunt 😂😂😂

'Ballycunt' is quality altogether!!!

I think about what the girls at school used to think, because I still bump into them now everywhere. All the time. Ireland is small.

I went to a secondary school in the countryside. It accepted girls from five surrounding villages and two towns.

Now as an adult in my thirties , if I go to any group in my town or in a town near me, I will bump into some girl that went to school with, and she will still be unfriendly.

Last week, I went to an adult drama group in a town that was two towns away from me. In it was a girl that I went to school with. She wasn't nice.

A couple of weeks before that I joined a choir, and in it was a girl I went to school with. She was chilly.

Ireland is so small that you can't get away from school people, even when you're an adult.

Your last bit is right though :)

I'm a bit disappointed this evening. I'm English and been living in Ireland for 20+ years.

I took DC to a party on Saturday. Another parent asked what I was doing that evening and I said I had an evening of watching rugby with England on at 5pm and Ireland on at 8pm. She then said 'oh you're watching England?' in a shocked tone And I said yeah - my Irish DH and DS watch England matches with me and I then watch the Ireland matches with them. Other parent says 'oh you support england' and I say yes I do. She then asks what happens when England play Ireland and I explain I am fairly neutral and am happy with any outcome, I love seeing Ireland do well. Conversation moved on.

DM was at school drop off today and parents were talking about the Ireland match on Saturday. This parent then says to everyone 'I can't believe Frankinbeans supports England'. My DM said 'well she was born there'. I'm a little bit disappointed that a) other parent is so horrified that I support the country I was born in and b) she decided to announce to all parents and drop off that she can't believe I support them.

I think I see this person in a different light now, which is disappointing. She's a grown adult and her behaviour has been childish.

Well I was very unpatriotic and had a good snooze during the Ireland match.

@JaneJeffer Ireland were playing something?

Apparently so @Neverinamonthofsundays 😴
I saw a lovely video afterwards of a Scottish boy being serenaded with Flower of Scotland by Ireland fans which was nice.

I have and wil not watch any 'sport' where people chase a ball around a field in shorts no less. Absolutely no way. My entire family watch every sport going, the most ball action I get is having to try avoid looking at dp's while he struts around the bedroom like a peacock!

The old hatred of the English rises it's head again. She is being xenophobic. Say to her 'why shouldn't I support England". And see what she says

I'm really sorry that happened to you. It's horrible to be singled out like that.

She sounds like a horrible person.

I can just about bear some sports. But i think rugby is so boring!