Dealing with the onset of senility

[Fluffydiamond]

We're in a tricky position with my dad. He is 80. He is adamant about staying in his home but equally doesn't want to pay for home help. He's quite well off but loathe to part from cash! We've been looking at independent living homes. There's one in Enniscrone. Me and my brother are flummoxed. He's becoming more and more difficult. He is totally unrealistic too and is talking about going to a home in 10 years. He's not physically great shape either. He has diabetes and arthritis. Any Irish mumsnetters dealing with this? Any tips?

Does your dad live in sligo / near enniscrone. If so that scenario sounds good .my parents are in their 80s.we have a fab cleaner that comes in has the cupan tae and chat and then guts the place. Got thru a local face book page. In actual fact we sort of knew relatives of hers as it turned out so it felt safer.we contacted the public health nurse. Applied to home help.the first person who came to showe dad wasnt very nice.we then refused it.then reapplied after a few months and got a lovely man thru the hse which Dad has got used to. They both enjoy the chat when he comes. He is free.
The cleaner is 14 euro an hr.
We then needed a person for mam but the criteria for home help she scores too well so cant access anything !! Even tho her mobility is poor. So back in to the local f book page. I got loads of replies. From carers in N homes / older ladies who were on to earn a few euro and had looked after their own elderly relatives. Again a girl my sister went to school with applied. She will bring in turf. Have the chats (v important ) and shower mam 14euro an hr.i would try and help him live in his own home as long as possible. Check your insurance to ensure it covers household workers and chevk references honestly it was just a local buy and sell page. Our amazing cleaner brings home their bedding and washes and dries it. Change is hard .having strangers is hard in your home but after 2 weeks they look forward to them coming !! As a family we are thrilled.hope this marathon reply helps