I honestly cannot afford to live

[Inkdrinker]

I work 40 hour weeks, yet I was paid 6 days ago and I'm already completely out of money. My rent is more than half of my pay, council tax is a further 250 pounds, my energy bills are ridiculous despite trying to cut down on using so much.

I have 3 kids to look after. How are people going survive this? This is by no means a ploy to ask others for money, I do not want anyone's money. I just want to know I'm not alone in this situation

I a single parent and get 8p% of my childcare paid

Have you checked if you are entitled to any help - entitledto.co.uk will work out if you can get any help with your rent, council tax etc.

If you are struggling to repay your council tax arrears, please contact your council and explain - they will look to reduce your arrears repayment.

Also see if you gas/electricity supplier has any grants or funding that you can apply for - Im with Octopus and they do this for those in financial need.

It is really shit at the moment but hopefully you can get some help.

You're not alone - this time last year we were able to save about £500-800 per month (before any outgoings on non-essential items), now we are running out of money before the end of the month and eating into our small pot of savings. We have already cut back so much and still there seems no end to everything going up, except our wages. We both work in middle level public sector jobs (experts in our fields) but have been on payfreezes or pay caps for the last 13 years. I cannot see a way out of this, I think we are going to lose our home. We aren't eligible for any benefits or help as we don't qualify as low income, although surely that threshold should be reviewed now with everything costing more, the low income threshold should be increased to include all of us who haven't had a pay rise anywhere near to cost of living in the last decade?

Just read that council tax is going up by the max 5% next year and that year after that. 2% relates to social care which is only going one way as people live longer and don't save for retirement. Seriously how do they expect people to pay for this?

It is rubbish for so many people right now
on the practical front Not sure how busy it is in your area but look on the Olio app - there is often bread / other food available for free. Super Olio collectors collect from supermarkets / sandwich shops etc and make sure it gets distributed - so no referral needed just keep an eye on the app

I've taken on a second job although I already work full time.

Sorry not to be more practically helpful, but I know what it's like to struggle. (I fortunately didn't have kids at the time, but didn't have the funds to afford to move from a ripoff room in a shared house which cost me almost all my wages, & left me with not enough to eat each month, let alone do anything else. I couldn't go out, I missed friends' weddings, never had a holiday).
People who've not been there don't know what it's like, being completely on the breadline.

All I can say is don't let it get into you, don't let it define you - it's not you, it's because this government isn't looking after its people, and chose not to do something about rent costs and about energy prices. That's not you doing anything wrong, it's a system that's not working - and not working for a lot of people. People out there do understand (I certainly do) and care.

Please keep your spirits up, and I wish you all the very best in getting through this time.

I can sympathize. I am currently selling clothes on a website to make extra cash and I work 48 hours a week.

I remember thinking it was a conspiracy theory when people talked about the breaking of the middle class but it really seems that's what's happening.

I'm sorry. It's so shit.

If I was single I'd be absolutely struggling. We're managing because there are 2 of us.

Please look at a benefits calculator and also turn2us to see if there are any grants you qualify for.

Even a 40p weekly UC claim might be worth it as it's a passport to other benefits.

I honestly think women are going to have to form communes or something. Team up with other women to save money (even if needing a bigger house) share responsibilities and childcare.

Is there anyway you could downsize? DC share a bedroom perhaps and you sleep in the living room? Might mean you can go from 4 to 2 bedrooms (if you are in a 4bedroom place right now).

I know it's a horrible suggestion, it's a desperate suggestion.

Good luck. You are not alone.

You’re not alone OP, and I’m sorry you’re in this situation.

To everyone on this thread in the same position, please do not be ashamed to reach out for help. I know in Scotland that if you have a child under 5 years old, your health visitor can often refer you to people who can help - I’m sorry I don’t have any info for other places.

It’s no one’s business how anyone came to be in the situation they’re in, but it’s so unhelpful for people to comment about how many children someone has chosen to have. Firstly, no one knows their circumstances. Secondly, life happens - babies happen, relationships break down, employment changes. Thirdly, the cost of living has increased so much that it’s unreasonable to expect people to just adjust. Some people were already struggling before this happened, and many many more are now

Hi

I would speak to council tax and see if you can come to a more affordable arrangement.

Have you checked if you're entitled to universal credit possibility council tax reduction?

I can’t afford to live either. I’m freezing cold my dc has given up full time education a few weeks ago so I’ve lost all my working tax credit. She’s gone to live with her dad - I can’t afford to buy food. I work full time in an admin job - I don’t want to go on universal credit I don’t want to go to a food bank. I can’t pay my energy bill next week. I don’t want “ debt” advice ! It’s bloody depressing - I don’t live I just exist. I have nothing.

@letsallmeetupinthehyear2000
Why don’t you want to take Universal Credit if you are entitled to it?
It’s designed to help people out, even people who have full time jobs. My neighbour volunteers for the CAB and he says for most people UC is miles better and easier to claim than the old system. The only downside is the five week waiting period but if you have a job at least you would have a bit of money coming in during that period.

Can I be another ‘dick’ on here and ask why anybody needs or wants three children? Off topic but I wholeheartedly agree.

I had three children when I was married to a high earner.

No3 was conceived on the coil.

Was I supposed to give them back?

Or somehow predict my husband was going to shag a colleague?

I’m in a band E council tax 261 months over 10 months dreading the increase , I feel for all of us that are struggling to make ends meet!

It's fairly recent in history that people have had such small families. Most people have had more than three historically. We shouldn't live in a country where people can't support there families.

I know you’re all trying to be kind - but the problem is NOT “single mums all living in 4-bedders with mock Tudor exterior and 2 drawing rooms”. Oh if only! 😂

Absolutely go for UC, it opens the doors for so much else - and if you put a claim in you can take an advance paid back over 2 years - and that advance will hit your bank in 2 days. UC isn’t all doom and gloom - and there’s no brown letters of doom announcing this week’s “final final amended final tax award”. 🙄

I really sympathise, especially that you're actually going out there and doing a day's work too. You're not entitled to more housing benefit or other top ups ?

I live in the North West and myself and my partner aren't doing too bad considering. Still waiting for a pay rise as in pay talks at the moment. We are definitely working class, not middle class by any means but property is so much cheaper here. Our council tax is currently £140pm. And we don't have kids by choice so I'm sure that helps. We really feel for our relatives though with 3/4 kids and I know they are struggling more than us so we are finding ourselves being more generous with them. We have definitely felt inflation don't get me wrong, I guess things just aren't so bad as we don't have children. I really recommend moving up north even if it's council property. The people are friendly as well which is a bonus.

Have you looked to see if you are eligible for any benefits? I’m a single parent and I get tax credits. I couldn’t do without them.

I feel your pain. Two teenagers here, 2 weeks before each pay day I’ve run out of money and resort to credit cards for essentials. This in turn means the following month I’m even more in debt but what can I do? My gas used to be £40 a week, it’s now £70, electric used to be £15 a week, it’s now £45…..I mean WTAF??!!! Don’t get me started on petrol and food. I now no longer do any ‘pleasure’ journeys because I can’t afford the fuel. And food wise I struggle. Every item gone up 20/30/40/50p if not more. Cheese in Aldi was £1.79 6 months ago, it’s now £2.65!!!! That’s just ONE item. I too work hard and long hours, we are still only just surviving though. I’m a single mum, no input from Dad, get a small amount of UC but not much as I ‘earn too much’ haha what a joke! Hardly put the heating on this year, we’ve been so cold but I just can’t afford it. Big pile of 💩

Sorry but I'm another who questions your council tax. I live under an extremely expensive council (predominantly Tories) in a band E house. (Not boasting, it's a very old property and there's no way the landlord could bring it up to standard without shelling out thousands and so hasn't increased the rent in 10 years, plus I was in much better circumstances when I moved here). My council tax is "only" £220 a month. Unless you're living in a band F+ house, how come you're paying so much?

You are not alone. I work full time too and I haven't put the heating on once this winter, not once. I just can't afford it, its out of the question, I just pretend I live in a house without heating