I haven't been able to put my heating on yet

[Anono2022]

I know I'm one of MANY, but I cant help be feel like a bloody failure right now!

I work full time in a school support role for SEN. I have a SEN child myself. I am a single parent with no help from father. Literally everything falls on me.
I'm miserable. i cant heat our home! My monthly electricity is coming in at 170 alone and I'm only paying 100 which is the maximum I can afford! After outgoings have all gone out I have very limited money to feed us on. How the hell am i meant to afford to put the the heating on? Any help available to me is limited due to me having a mortgage.
I feel ashamed and very lonely as everyone around me has a partner/decent two income household. No one understands how tight my finances are.
I come home from work and I often cry because I cant afford even a simple lifestyle. I'm utterly miserable and frozen!

This is just a vent really as I know I am one of very very many. But God I feel shit that i feel like im doing my very best and its not good enough.

We are so close to Xmas now and I've not even brought a single thing. How can I be excited for Christmas when I cant even keep us warm.

Can you turn off the hot water so that running taps and washing hands won't use up your gas boiler, and just have boiler on for short(er) showers and the actual central heating to come on for shorter periods?
Clothes spun once more after washing then hung on airers in a room with a radiator or dehumidifier or fan dry quickly and may only need 5 minutes in a drier for bedding
Don't use fan heaters, they eat money
Electric throws are incredible and use v little electricity
It's so hard, I hope you are both warm and well today

From my experience I would say the electric shower and the tumble dryer are the big costs for electric

my electric is around 25 - 30 a week
Large 2bed 2 bath houses
someone always at home we don’t go around switching the lights off or turning things off

check your rate
when I switched to a smart meter and to a new tarriff EDF fucked up and kept me on a much higher day rate

mine is 32.2 pence per kwh and that’s pre pay

gas which is on at the moment for heating and hot water is around £100 a month
But I refuse to sit and freeze

@Anono2022 , I am so sorry to hear of your situation.

Do bear in mind how much more expensive electricity is than gas.

Tariffs vary, but my gas is 10p per kWh and my electric is 35p per kWh.

www.ft.com/content/2b7109f8-04e2-4137-b7ff-b1caf44cb4bc This is a really good graphic about single-use costs I think. You can move the sliders to change the length of a shower, for example (it estimates a 10 minute shower as 50p). I think it is useful to know where real savings can come and put your effort into those. Your electricity seems high to me.

I am on a smart meter and assuming the app I use is working correctly, so far this month we have spent 33 on electricity and 51 on gas (whereas in November, the total bill was about 200, with electricity being a bit more than half). I wfh, and the heating is on a fair bit and the house (small 3 bed) is fairly cool but not cold, two of us here.

HTH. Good luck in finding a solution.

We have reduced our KWh from 500 Nov 21 to 350 Nov 22. We now only use the tumble dryer for towels and bedding. We only use the dishwasher once per week (to stop it smelling) and hand wash other days. We use the slow cooker and air fryer often, rarely use the oven now. We have limited showers to 5 minutes (somebody in the house had issues similar to what you describe - we reduced the time gradually for that particular person from 25/30 minutes to about 8 with time countdown/reminder while they shower). I think your biggest use of electricity that you need to reduce will be the showers.

This is slightly off topic, sorry OP but HOW do these fucking shitbag men get away with not supporting their kids? That's a genuine question (I don't have children myself)
Hope you find some support OP, I'm afraid I have no practical advice!

Maybe the "fucking shitbag man" has mental health issues, is disabled or cannot work due to ill health ?

He might be on a very low (minimum wage).

He might even be dead.

Yes he might actually be not contributing when he should. But it's a bit off to refer to him as a "fucking shitbag man" unless more of a backstory is provided.

Fair enough, maybe I should not have used such strong words. But I would like to understand the context.
And I feel like I read very often on here about men who shirk their responsibilities with none of the mitigating circumstances you describe.

I'll reply properly later but unfortunately he is a shitbag. He has no mental health issues, well paid job, is very much alive. He actually works with disabled people. The irony

Thanks all for your replies. Genuinely concerned now about my usage. I'm not just saying it but I cant understand why my usage is so high because I know what I use. Even with the high energy items I'm still a relatively low user overall I'm terms of how we live.

The heating has to go on this weekend. After a massive lecture from my Mum (I get it no one should live like this) but im so scared about how it's going to get paid. A few years ago my annual use cost me no more than £750 for the year! And I had stuff running without a second thought. I haven't used the heating yet and my monthly bills are more than double what I have historically paid.

All very useful advice and I sincerely thank you all for your tips. I have to be honest, most I already do but it's good to know I am being sensible.

UC is an horrendous system for me. It cuts my tax credits down to a third because I dont qualify for anything other than the basic elements. As my son is not officially diagnosed yet too there is no extra help. I'm told its because I'm mortgaged which I find shocking, as they will happily oay rent to cover someone else's mortgage!

I definitely need support with his DLA. Its been nearly a year of fighting but i dont know whether to start over. To be honest im absolutely offended to be told he is age appropriate. It makes me sad how delayed he is. I feel like I've been made out to be a liar because I took on a school that had failed him.

With regards to my son and simply not being able to have his long showers, I get it but then it's not that easy to take something away from him that gives him that much comfort. It's the ONLY thing we have found that makes him feel comfortable. Of course I'll keep encouraging him to come out quicker but if he has spent the whole day getting worked up and feels out of control of himself and that's the only comfort he gets, it's not easy to take it away from him.

Father is totally absent by choice and maintainence is forced from wages but rarely paid. Though it may not be right presuming. He definitely does fit the description from the above poster

Again, I'd really look at getting a bath tap shower attachment - showers will cost about a third of what they do at the moment if you use gas to heat the water rather than electric.

I used to think this, but our current smartmeter readings proof the opposite. Obviously, you need to check your system's consumption, both your central heating and the electric heater that you consider as an option.
We are gas free at present and spending a much lower kwh, moneywise I gave my numbers, less than 130 per month for a 2 bed large house, 3 of us.

Im not sure that comparison holds up.
For heating a single room, possibly...

My EPC says the kwh needed to heat my flat and water for a year is 8000 - it's a hell of a lot cheaper to use that in gas than electricity.

@Anono2022 have you called the energy company yet? Because, again, you REALLY need your meter testing. There's no charge for this and it's the most likely issue.

...also they can check that you don't have a neighbour who's hacked into your meter so you're paying for them, too. It's not unheard of by any means.

Are you heating a small warm space rather than the whole house? I would think it would work out cheaper to do this, but still not good for the house to be so cold.

If your annual usage is around 3000KWh that's pretty good for electric as is 8000KWh for gas. At prices now that should be costing you about £2000 a year combined, which is below the averages trotted out by the government atm. That would work out at about £166 pcm for both.

When I spoke to British Gas to tell them I couldn't afford no more that £100 I was told that taking into account the £66 from the government for those set months I'd be in debt after a year of £800. I couldn't understand why because last year I shaved alot off our average annual usage.

We are currently sat in a warm home. It feels wonderful but it's made me sad that it makes me feel scared. I collected my son after school and I just couldn't take him home to such a cold house. Its been so cold my toes have been hurting! Even our dog is struggling. I'm going to turn it off at 9pm so that will be an hour and a half. I've also started taking my meter readings to get a better idea of what's going on.

Does anyone know roughly how much an hour and a half use will work out at?

Totally depends on house size, number of radiators, boiler efficiency, insulation etc etc etc

If you've gone from a cold standing start, the first hour or so will use a lot more energy to reach temperature, it reduces down once its reached that and uses less to maintain it

I'm glad you're warm! Fingers crossed you can find some way of keeping it going..

That’s so helpful 🙄

The inside of the house was bitter. I'm just glad it works properly!

My boiler is powerful for the house size. We live in a two bed mid terrace, large double convector rads in each room. House is well insulted. Once it's hot it does well at retaining it. I'll keep an eye on figures over the new few weeks. I think then I can go back to BG with any concerns.

I really do appreciate all the the advice

"Maintenance is via a DOE however it rarely gets paid and the CMS are useless at getting payment.*

Can you explain this? The employer should take it straight from his wages. And if he's self employed then I don't think a DOE could have been applied.

Yes they should but it is not guaranteed. Something that the CMS consistently tell me that they can't guarantee payment so not to rely on it. I was also told by the agent who spoke to me he can tell me for certain they will never enforce or take PP to court for non payment. I believed a DOE gave some level of security. It hasn't.

So between 7.30pm to 11pm I've used 1 unit on my gas and 5 units on my electricity. This was the bulk of our day though, 2 x showers, 1 x washing load, 1 TV and playstation going, airfryer for 18 minutes, hairdryer for 10 minutes and two lights on. Boiler was running for 90 minutes.

I should add, and freezer, fridge, router, cooker and microwave. They never get turned off at the switch

Out of curiosity what are others using during the night? From 11pm to 9.15am I used 2 units on the electricity and 1 gas. No heating on during the night but I do have a combination boiler. Phone charged overnight but auto stops once full, heated blanket on bed for 1.5 hours total. And all standard appliances like fridge, freezer, router, microwave and cooker (no it use but display clocks).
Does that sound about right

Try ‘fight back for justice’ on Facebook. Good luck OP