I need help to stop spending!

[IWantAMooseCalledDominic]

Hi All,

As the title goes, I really need some help to stop spending money I don't have on stuff I absolutely don't need!
I've spent nearly €170 so far this month on cigarettes, coffees, junk food and eating out. I don't have €170 to spend like that. I've dragged myself back from the brink of serious money trouble so many times over the last year, consolidated loans etc etc...but I just can't stop the unnessecary spending. Obviously cigarettes are a major problem and kind of a separate issue (or maybe not), but it's the constand impulsive spending on coffees and stuff like that which is killing me.
I'm suffering from depression, and it's just such a destructive cycle, I'm so worried about money, so I'm stressed, so then I overeat and smoke, which costs me money....it's so pathetic I know.
Has anyone successfully stopped stupid spending and if so could you share your tips/give me a virtual slap?
Thanks...

Do you spend on card or cash? If card, perhaps draw cash instead and allow yourself a certain amount then once it's spent, it's spent and don't draw anymore!

Could you get a reusable cup so you can make your own coffees to take with you? Carry some snack bars in your bag so if you get tempted to buy lunch you ll have something already on you?

Thanks Bean. It's mostly card. On small amounts that just add up. I do have a reusable cup already and bring lunch into work most days.

I think I will try taking a set amount out and then leaving my card at home to see if i can curb it that way!

Its more a mindset thing. I mean I do all the right things, I budget, I track my spending, I menu plan, but I just keep self-sabatoging with impulsive spending.
I don't want to be like this, I really don't but no matter how many stern talkings-to I give myself I just can't stop for longer than a week.

Watching with interest!

Unfortunately I can't offer any tips myself as I'm a dreadful impulse spender. I fritter away worrying amounts of money on magazines, paperbacks, make up and takeaway coffees...so I can't even say I have something to show for it! Trying to save up towards a big purchase, so could do with some ideas!

I only go out with cash, usually, but I end up taking £150-200 in cash with me, so it sort of defeats the purpose.

Perhaps set yourself a challenge of a couple of "no spend" days? I rarely spend anything at work. Apart from a cafe/restaurant, there is no where to spend it. I take a packed lunch in and have my tea/coffee stuff at work. Most of my colleagues do as well, except my boss who complains bitterly about always being skint, but can't stop spending at least £5 a day on lunch and coffees!

Maybe set up a savings account and as soon as you get paid, transfer a percentage of what you normally spend on impulse buys to the savings so you dont actually have access to as much disposable money. Once you start seeing the savings build up it might encourage you to put more aside next time and then you can use the savings for sonething worthwhile?

Take away coffees are my weakness, plus a little cake to go with it usually!

Another one watching for tips - I've just blown my budget with an IKEA trip. We now own loft beds. I went to buy candles and Daim bars

I got my elderly mum out of this cycle for six months by keeping her cards and giving her a fixed amount every week. It worked very well and reduced her debt and unnecessary spending....until she needed her card back for an "emergency" and it started all over again. You really have to want to change and I think maybe identifying why you do it is a way to start.

That's true Nepotism - about wanting to change and identifying reasons why it happens. I think I'm doing it because I've overhauled my diet, given up booze, caffeine and excess sugar and feel I need to get a thrill from somewhere!
Maybe exercise will have to be my boring solution

Ha, you sound like you need to replace it with a healthy addiction! Mine is Pinterest - not healthy, but free!

Sorry I didn't get back on last night - fell asleep early with DS!

Nepotism I think you're right, I need to identify why I really do it. On the surface it's just like "oh I fancy a coffee and chocolate sure what's the harm" but I know when I've done that 5 days a week I'm kicking myself and I'm like mad's boss - skint and complaining bitterly (to myself!) about it.

I do like the idea of "no spend" days I have to say, think that might help. I think I get overwhelmed by telling myself I can't spend any money on this stuff at all and then I can't stick to it (and I don't budget for it properly either), but if I gave myself a set amount of money to spend per week and then did a couple of no spend days I might see some results.

Thanks all, this has really been helpful!

Something that really helped me was setting up an easy access savings account. Everytime before I bought something I asked myself do I REALLY need this? More often than not the answer was no. I would then immediately open up my online banking app and transfer over what I would have spent whether it was £3 for a coffee or £30 for a top into the savings account.

Because it's an easy access account I can easy take the money back out to use for groceries etc if I run out of money in my current account before the end of the month. But seeing how that money is building up gives me the same 'buzz' spending it gave me.

Oh Rum - that's an excellent idea, I use my banking app all the time and already have a (slightly neglected) easy access savings account linked to it.
I'm definitely going to give that a shot.

Good luck IWantAMoose!

Cold turkey
!

Rum that is a super idea - and I've already put it into practice today! Feeling much more positive about it now that I've a couple of clear strategies.

Good luck to all my fellow spenders

I would also try and budget for some fritter if you can as going cold turkey is the hardest. Be kind to yourself, use money to buy nice treat like coffee to make yourself it will still be cheaper.

How about opening an account & putting £50 in a month & only taking that card out with you everyday.

Leave the current account card at home to 'look after the house'

If you take out large amounts of cash leave most at home. So £150 in cash and you estimate £10 for Monday, just take a tenner.

spending cash is harder, psychology stuff at play here, because you have to physically give your hard earned cash to another person.