Judicious June... the frugaleers continue!

[ArtemisatBrauron]

For those who like to plan ahead... god why is it not pay day already...

I've cancelled credit expert and equifax again. I cancelled last year but I needed access so I had to join again.

Just got to post my eBay stuff tomorrow now.

Rogue ouch! Hope you are feelling much better now, or very soon. Done similar myself, not good.

Kinky I also undertsand the 'sod it' attitude, had that myself for a while. Re your Q about our finances, we 'share' everything as in all but 1 bank account (and the house & cars here) are in joint ñames. He just gets pánico stricken and reverts to his parents Style of doing things íe the man 'goes out to work' and therefore owns everything, and the woman does everything else and doesn't need accesos to 'his' money.

When this happens he tells me I can't access the joint account, he is going to pay everything from his other account (I do also have my own account despite his efforts to persuade me I don't need to). Then goes on a spending spree because he's stressed. Then gets stressed because he's running round like a blue arsed fly doing everything that he took for granted that I would.

I stepped off the rollercoaster a few years ago.

I need to pick up a few things Today, but I am not driving in to town to have lunch with OH between his meetings.

Fluffy I don't know, but Those sound like extensive services, are they needed for work?

No I needed to see my credit report. I needed instant access so I had to suck it up.

I stopped paying for meals out when I had the epiphany that he has money for his hobby, which is not cheap, but none for eating out, and while he was always very grateful that doesn't pay the bill.

If we go anywhere now I'll pay my bit and no more because I don't drink and allergies mean most puddings or coffees are out too.

NSD.

Ahh, so that's how I could find out my crédito rating, Thanks.

That would annoy me too fluffy, when I still worked we paíd 50/50 for whatever we did.

10/16

Have just checked our bank account and it is not looking good. I think we have roughly £90 left for food and day to day minor things like playgroup after bills have come out. Pay day is the 12th. We could do it as I've already meal planned so only need fruit and milk . Unfortunately there's also around £170 on the credit card that needs paying. I'm definitely going to list some stuff on ebay tonight and just accept that this month is overdraft month. We very rarely use it and I suppose this is why we have it.

Glad kinkycat is ok. We spent a small fortune on our pet even with insurance. I'd do it again though.

Dentist surprisingly painless (in every sense) - just £18 today, and need one filling replaced at some point next month. DCs' teeth all fine :)

Spent £1.19 on Organix toddler crack rice cakes, £1on fizzy water for me. Posted a nappy I sold as well. Wish the rest would go, they need new baby bums to bond with!

£6.60 for school dinner and £25 for cleaner. Tomorrow will be spent in London for work but will charge work for all expenditure from parking to tickets to lunch. So should be an NSD...!

NSD here, I paid for postage for eBay sales but I had estimated it pretty correctly and didn't make a loss so I was spending other people's money!
I made about £130 in total profits, pretty pleased but was also pleased when I realised I didn't have the time to sell anything else before we move and can just chuck anything else I want rid of to the charity shop without feeling guilty.

Well done on that profit Artimas

I spent £12 in the supermarket, £9 on snacks because I couldn't face shopping with DDs bickering and CBA going out before school pick-up so I left them together in the supermarket coffee shop, then another £2 as I remembered I wanted mustard and a packed of soup.

Plus roads at £2.40.

OH filled the car with petróleo on Sat and used 1/4 tank over the weekend. He's now fretting about mileage on the car another of his favourites and someone has pranged it ever so slightly. I don't give a monkeys tbh. Estate agent has posponed the open day event by a week Due to weather forecast and that propsective buyer who never turned up has bought something in town. Tomorrow is another day

Adora that sounds really draining for both of you! I think 'the way our parents did things' can have an awful lot of influence over people. I just hope you always have access to money and he doesn't cut you off entirely. It winds me up when people take for granted the SAHM.

Thats If you find you are struggling, I really would head over to moneysavingexpert and get on their forums - Old Style is excellent for making money stretch and Debt Free Wannabe is fab too. It sounds like a tough month.

Us too, Exasperated - we got away with 2 check ups. £36. Plus a comic bribe for DS to get him to open his mouth. £3.

Artemis Well done on £130!

Vets today so another bill. I would love a NSD.

Adora was just wondering do you guys have a timeline that you want to achieve this? Or does dp have an idea about what he wants to do? It just sounds like a terrible limbo and I wouldn't be able to deal so well with it as you are!!!

Day off today for some pre-move decluttering, so should be a NSD. NSD yesterday too but spent a bit at the w/e on b'day present for friend and welcome-to-the-world present for her new grandson. Yes, GRANDson. At 42 & with 2 pre-schoolers I'm not quite ready to accept I'm in a generation of grandparents! Had a good catch up and yummy newborn cuddles so it was a lovely afternoon.

Then on Sunday ended up paying £15 for impromptu picnic type lunch at new house. I should really keep some stuff in stock for this type of thing as I always end up popping in to the supermarket and buying things we don't really need.

Kinky glad your cat has pulled through but, yes, ouch at the cost. It does sound as if you've had some rough luck. Have you told us about your holiday? Sounds like you deserve one.

Adora you are in a tough situation and facing it with so much grace. I think I would have exploded by now!

Fortunately DH and I tend to agree about priorities for money and have complementary attitudes to it - I am a reformed fritterer but good at keeping track of accounts, looking for deals etc; DH is a saver and generally frugal but is totally disorganised and can never be bothered to eg compare car insurance, buys thing from people who ring him up etc (grr!). Our family "issues" with money are with FiL - long story but essentially he has helped us out in the past but judges everything we spend money on. Eg we have had to keep him away from the new house so he can't see we've had a skip, he thinks we should be driving the rubble to the tip a car load at a time.

Thank you for the suggestion kinky but we've been saved by dh company giving us £200 expenses he was owed. I'm worried how I managed to forget about that! Anyway that means credit card can be paid and I now have £120 until payday. I think I'll need £50-60 for groceries so we're ok. School has sent letter home requesting more money, will be glad when summer holidays come round and the constant requests stop for a while but replaced with dc demands

Dd has been asking if we can make playdough and do some baking. Hopefully we can fulfil her wishes and keep the weekend fairly spend free. The following weekend we're doing stuff but it's been paid for so will just need a lunch.

takeaway a time line? yeah, anytime from "what if we just stayed here" to "we need to sell by June to be able to get DDs into school in the UK for September" I'm pushing for the beginning of school in the UK

Spangle thanks, but it's not the first time and now I know his script I'm able to distance myself from his thought processes and resultant actions, at least emotionally. So now it's only actually draining for him, he's the one swinging from 1 extreme to the other. My FIL also seems to think he should have a say in our finances.

NSD 9! Although work will get a claim of about £32 for food and parking. Which is quite cheap I think.

Adora - hope you do get to sell and move. June is coming to a close though... !

Yep, sure is.

Spent a little bit Today but too tired to Get my head round it, will up date Tomorrow.

Hope you're okay Adora.

Spangle Good luck with declutter. Clutter is one thing us fritterers have in abundance. The holiday is 'DD has had 2.5 years of leukaemia/chemotherapy and she wants to go to Disney'. We are staying in the Animal Kingdom Lodge for a fortnight in August. I shall be paying for it for years to come. We've never had a family holiday and we have had the most shocking time. It is foolish in terms of cost, but we are all looking forward to it. We could have gone to the charity, but they prefer you to travel whilst on treatment and we didn't want to do that. Also, we could source the money when many families in our situation can't. To give you an idea, the insurance alone was £900.

Pleased you're okay Thats .

Hello to everyone else .

You sound understandably stressed adora hope things are brighter this morning.

kinky your holiday sounds lovely, I am sure your daughter will have a great time. Some things are more important than money/not being in debt.

Thanks Artemis. It is definitely needed!

Another one hoping today is better for you Adora.

We lived with "we're moving / not moving / might be moving / will be moving / won't be moving" stress for the last two years. It's terribly draining. Although we actually did move in a way the problem is still with us because we still have a house we don't want to own with tenants in it we don't want.

I get paid today . We had money in the food budget so we had a trip out for pizza on Sunday. Managed to end the month £20 up on the food budget so all good there.

Also managed to have 2 NSDs a week for the last three weeks. Today was going to be one but a friend is coming round for a takeaway so it will be NSD central Thursday and Friday!!

Kinky your holiday sounds lovely - you all definitely deserve it - and I'm sure it will all feel worth it when you're there and you see your DD enjoying herself. When I was young I didn't see spending money on experiences as important - I thought money was for buying 'stuff' - but I have completely changed my way of thinking. After DH and I got married we still had about £1k of wedding costs, but I then got the chance to do some travel with work to South Africa and then the USA and we decided at the last minute that DH should come too and stay on for a few days to do some sightseeing, and a mini safari in SA. I remember having nearly £4k on my credit card afterwards but I'm so glad we did it. I doubt I still have any of the shoes/clothes/tat that I bought back then but I still have the memories.

£5 off Aldi shop in the mirror tomorrow. They always fall on Dh's turn to pay the food bill.

Humm, reading that back i hope it doesn't sound like I'm advocating (on a frugalising thread!) getting massively in debt I guess my point is about prioritising the things that matter most. When I was in full on frittering mode I would look for stuff to buy.... it didn't give me any real pleasure and I end up chucking it out or having to find spaces to store it. And not being able to afford the things I really want. I still have tendencies that way but much, much better at curbing them... Especially now I don't have a choice!

Today won't be a NSD as I have to order the grocery shopping. I will do £40 at Ocado as I have a voucher for a bottle of wine that expires soon, then as I have a bit of time this week I will get the rest from Aldi.

Adora I hope your situation sorts itself out soon