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Original poster

Dear people who were parents of toddlers in lockdown

206 replies

jallopeno · 02/09/2023 19:40

How on earth did you manage?!!

I'm so sorry. I don't think I realised how much of a struggle it must have been. Hope you're doing OK.

OP posts:
MrsSkylerWhite · 02/09/2023 20:23

KateyCuckoo · Today 20:11
You're being really weird! Toddlers are happy with their family and their home, extra lucky if you had a garden with all that lovely weather. Try getting through it with teens, home schooling, mental health, can't see friends, get first jobs, start driving lessons. Screwed over when it came to exams and uni... toddlers in comparison were easy! I'm a childminder, I did both”

I didn’t want to be the one to say this, but I agree. I think it was much more mentally challenging for older children.

brokenbics · 02/09/2023 20:27

I had a 3 year old and a difficult pregnancy which unfortunately ended badly. It was horrific, I was in tears pretty much every day. I've never felt exhaustion like it. Plenty of people much worse off than me though so I still counted my blessings

Sipperskipper · 02/09/2023 20:27

I had a 3 year old and was pregnant. Work kept me off as shielding (nurse) which I am so, so thankful for. I remember the days feeling long and feeling sad for DD missing out on her lovely preschool and fun in parks etc.

A few weeks after DD2 was born, DD1 became very ill and ended up in intensive care many miles away. Dealing with that during lockdown and being separated from my newborn for weeks at a time was the most awful thing. Thankfully, she is now a wonderfully healthy 6 year old, but pretty sure I have PTSD from those few weeks.

Annon1234 · 02/09/2023 20:28

I was furloughed but it was still the hardest time. I feel like people that worked through think people that were furloughed had a jolly all that time, my child had just turned 1, I’d suffered with pnd, just coming out of the other side and we were put in lockdown, husband worked 12 hour days as he was a key worker so it was just me and a 1 year old for hours, days, weeks on end and the loneliness was honestly another level. I really feel like it ruined the early years of my child’s life for me.

notahappybunny7 · 02/09/2023 20:29

My dd turned 4 in the first lockdown and I coped absolutely fine, she still socialised with the neighbours children of the same age, remember the fabulous weather? Paddling pool out every day, barbecues. No lasting effects obviously. We did as we pleased , just as our politicians did.

YukoandHiro · 02/09/2023 20:29

KateyCuckoo · 02/09/2023 20:11

You're being really weird! Toddlers are happy with their family and their home, extra lucky if you had a garden with all that lovely weather. Try getting through it with teens, home schooling, mental health, can't see friends, get first jobs, start driving lessons. Screwed over when it came to exams and uni... toddlers in comparison were easy! I'm a childminder, I did both!

Yeah, but they're not fine if both parents are working and there is no garden and one parent is also suffering hypermesis while trying to hold down that job too.

YukoandHiro · 02/09/2023 20:30

Annon1234 · 02/09/2023 20:28

I was furloughed but it was still the hardest time. I feel like people that worked through think people that were furloughed had a jolly all that time, my child had just turned 1, I’d suffered with pnd, just coming out of the other side and we were put in lockdown, husband worked 12 hour days as he was a key worker so it was just me and a 1 year old for hours, days, weeks on end and the loneliness was honestly another level. I really feel like it ruined the early years of my child’s life for me.

Totally understand. I would have been preferred to be furloughed but it defo wouldn't have been a picnic!

Stormydayagain · 02/09/2023 20:31

My DD was 2.1 when lockdown started. I was working part time as a Paramedic, DH was full time WFH but covering his own and a colleagues work (her maternity leave started same time as lockdown so company unable to recruit and train temp). DH couldn’t take any time off until August but only because our boiler broke and we needed a new boiler/heating system installed. So childcare was mostly on me for the whole long slog.

DD was a late talker so barely had any two word sentences at the start of lockdown so communication was hard going.

I was round at a friends house last week for DD to have a play date and whilst the girls were upstairs for hours playing, friends 2yo DS was with us, and looking at him and what he could and couldn’t do, and then at all the things I can do with DD now at 5 (even at home on a rainy day) I just felt like I wanted to cry.

I think there were ages that were much harder on the kids and developmentally more damaging (lockdown really screwed up my friends, now 19, DD), but for the parents lockdown with a toddler was brutal.

Original poster
jallopeno · 02/09/2023 20:32

KateyCuckoo · 02/09/2023 20:11

You're being really weird! Toddlers are happy with their family and their home, extra lucky if you had a garden with all that lovely weather. Try getting through it with teens, home schooling, mental health, can't see friends, get first jobs, start driving lessons. Screwed over when it came to exams and uni... toddlers in comparison were easy! I'm a childminder, I did both!

I'm not being weird. I had a baby during lock down. First time mum. It was awful. Horrendous. I was simply looking at my now bouncy 3 year old and thinking bluddy hell how did people cope with this during wfh lockdown tier 2 meters apart or you'll catch covid.

OP posts:
IHeartGeneHunt · 02/09/2023 20:33

I had a one year old and a Jack Russell in a one bed flat by myself.
We went for a long walk every day. We walked to Lidl and back once a week.
And that was it. No garden, no outside space, no bubble as I have no family here.

I bought lots of toys like blocks and flashcards and paints etc etc online and did my best. She's turned out alright I reckon.

headcheffer · 02/09/2023 20:34

My DD1 was a baby in 2020 and has just turned 3.

I frequently think how hard it must have been for parents of toddlers/preschoolers now she's a little madam!!!

I don't know how you all managed. I also don't know how many of my friends with toddlers at the time gave me sympathy for having a newborn in lockdown. They must have thought I had it so easy!

notanaturalmum · 02/09/2023 20:34

At the start of lockdown I had an 11 month old and a 2.5 year old.
I've blocked most of it out.
My husband took them both for the daily walk at 4pm. I would then have 2 glasses of wine, cry, tidy up and then cook dinner.
Plus then catching up on work as I started a new job in a new company after my matleave ended.
I don't know how we got from March through to the September when the nurseries opened.
We couldn't even manage PE with Joe. The baby spent most of her time on the carpet with a rattle and the 2 year old was outside a lot painting things with water.
We had a weekly online music class that was recorded so we often did the same class 3 times a week.
It was hard, but we built a structure after a while that helped.
I feel for the parents who had to homeschool.
I wonder what the long term effects will be.

Original poster
jallopeno · 02/09/2023 20:34

@brokenbics 💐 I'm so sorry

OP posts:
Original poster
jallopeno · 02/09/2023 20:35

headcheffer · 02/09/2023 20:34

My DD1 was a baby in 2020 and has just turned 3.

I frequently think how hard it must have been for parents of toddlers/preschoolers now she's a little madam!!!

I don't know how you all managed. I also don't know how many of my friends with toddlers at the time gave me sympathy for having a newborn in lockdown. They must have thought I had it so easy!

You are in the same boat as me!

OP posts:
WantingToEducate · 02/09/2023 20:35

My son was 2.5 years old when Lockdown began and as odd as this sounds, we had a really lovely Lockdown. I also had a son who was 6.

I was very fortunate though as my husband was a teacher so he was furloughed and having him home with us probably made things 100 times easier and enjoyable.

I don’t think I would have had such a positive experience if I had been home alone with the two children every day 😬

CoffeeDay · 02/09/2023 20:35

We spent a lot of time in cold, empty playgrounds. It became a sort of challenge to find suitable toddler activities within covid regulations. We went to look at Christmas lights despite there being no markets or restaurants open. Fed lots of ducks. Took long drives just to be out of the house. My MH took a battering but I don't think anyone went through that time unscathed.

Looking back, I feel it was ok because at least she was too small to remember it all. She was always surrounded by people she loved and didn't understand the concept of disease and dying. I think the long-term impact was harder on older kids who could understand what was going on, but unable to make sense of it all. Those who were left to muddle through remote learning or forbidden to meet their friends.

The "rebound" was also quite amazing to experience. DD basically spent her earliest years in a very small bubble but she was happy because that's all she knew. Once covid lifted she suddenly realised things like restaurants, cafes, shopping malls, soft play, amusement parks, dance classes, treasure hunts, kids activities, bouncy castles, petting zoos, water parks, trains, boats etc actually existed. Her mind was absolutely blown and she wanted to do all the things all the time. Even today, whenever I suggest a new activity or place, she will instantly say yes.

gemloving · 02/09/2023 20:36

My child was 15 months, got through it. He's now 4! Big boy x

Corilee2806 · 02/09/2023 20:36

My daughter is now nearly 5 and recently brought home a book from the library called ‘Going Inside’ about the pandemic and I couldn’t actually read it to her without sobbing. Didn’t realise how raw it still was. She was 1.5 at the start and 2 later on when her brother was born. I think it changed me forever.

Batatahara · 02/09/2023 20:38

It was hard but in a way I felt lucky that we had preschool age children as private nurseries reopened well before schools and school nurseries so we got that respite and the kids got that feeling of normality sooner.

Corilee2806 · 02/09/2023 20:38

Agree on the point others have made about the rebound though! Have just had a lovely summer exploring and having days out which has been so lovely - but I also appreciate the value of days at home and simple things like trips to the park x

Bettyboobaloo · 02/09/2023 20:38

Same as we all managed. I certainly won't be doing it again. F off.

PurpleFlower1983 · 02/09/2023 20:39

My DD turned 1 a month before the first lockdown, we had a great time to be truthful, I was so thankful to spend so much uninterrupted quality time with her and see some firsts that I otherwise would have missed.

PurpleFlower1983 · 02/09/2023 20:41

It also made me appreciate simple things and see where we live in a completely new light.

Stormydayagain · 02/09/2023 20:41

I only have the one DD and we won’t be having anymore child, I feel sadness thinking about what we missed out on together on in those toddler years when she was developing fast and not in school. I feel sad that I won’t get another chance to experience it.

notahappybunny7 · 02/09/2023 20:41

CoffeeDay · 02/09/2023 20:35

We spent a lot of time in cold, empty playgrounds. It became a sort of challenge to find suitable toddler activities within covid regulations. We went to look at Christmas lights despite there being no markets or restaurants open. Fed lots of ducks. Took long drives just to be out of the house. My MH took a battering but I don't think anyone went through that time unscathed.

Looking back, I feel it was ok because at least she was too small to remember it all. She was always surrounded by people she loved and didn't understand the concept of disease and dying. I think the long-term impact was harder on older kids who could understand what was going on, but unable to make sense of it all. Those who were left to muddle through remote learning or forbidden to meet their friends.

The "rebound" was also quite amazing to experience. DD basically spent her earliest years in a very small bubble but she was happy because that's all she knew. Once covid lifted she suddenly realised things like restaurants, cafes, shopping malls, soft play, amusement parks, dance classes, treasure hunts, kids activities, bouncy castles, petting zoos, water parks, trains, boats etc actually existed. Her mind was absolutely blown and she wanted to do all the things all the time. Even today, whenever I suggest a new activity or place, she will instantly say yes.

Al of those things opened after about 3 months?