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Original poster

AIBU to be sick of people who think it's all back to normal?

794 replies

JanusTheFirst · 01/01/2023 09:16

Woke to the news that my cousin died early this morning of Covid. No underlying conditions and she was vaccinated. But she was elderly. She hardly ever went out but must have picked it up on a rare outing to the local shop.

People are still dying and we should still be looking out for those vulnerable to this awful disease. It isn't all back to normal. My cousin is dead and she wouldn't be but for Covid.

OP posts:
LuckySantangelo35 · 01/01/2023 11:21

Remmy123 · 01/01/2023 09:19

People die of the flu and other viruses esp if elderly.

@Remmy123
try having a bit of empathy mate

CovertImage · 01/01/2023 11:21

the maniacal, authoritarian restrictions caused far more damage than they prevented

Hyperbole much?

LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 01/01/2023 11:21

JanusTheFirst · 01/01/2023 09:28

I expect people to test if they are ill and isolate themselves until they are clear. I blame those who do not test and spread it around without even wearing a mask.

I blame those who think they may have it but don't test and don't wear a mask to stop it spreading.

I expect people to care for the wider community but it seems it's too big and ask for some here.

Show quote history

Do you realise that the most vulnerable in our community are the people who can’t afford to take a week off work and isolate themselves? As in, people who would literally lose their homes should they go without a week’s pay? Or those who rely on food banks who couldn’t get to them if they had to isolate? Not people who, for the most part, COVID is a mild illness.

Also, not everyone can afford tests. I know they’re cheap the COL crisis is so profound that people would forgo eating to be able to afford a COVID test

ancientgran · 01/01/2023 11:22

IDontCareMatthew · 01/01/2023 11:21

No @ancientgran it's nothing to do with being a decent human being etc etc

If you work with people then you just have to get on with it

No you don't, if you are ill keep your germs to yourself. If everyone did that the spread would go down and everyone would be safer.

FancyFanny · 01/01/2023 11:22

All the CEV people managed to get on with their lives prior to Covid despite flu being a big risk to them- they need to learn to do so again.

Jenasaurus · 01/01/2023 11:22

I am so sorry for your loss Op, I agree with you this isnt done and dusted, people in general if unwell should try to protect others as they would with any infectious disease. I was sitting next to a young lad (about 10) in a windowless waiting room at a salon while his mum had her nails done, he told me that he had hallucinated and had a high temperature and was coughing and sneezing continually, his mum shouldn't have taken him out in a very public place in that situation. in contrast my manicurist told me she was wearing a mask as getting over flu and wanted to protect customers, she was thoughtful. Then on Christmas day I went to my sons, and 5 of us were sitting close together on the sofa when his GF started sneezing and coughing she said she had been feeling very unwell for a few days and was annoyed when I stuck my nose and mouth in my roll neck jumper, I love her dearly but 2 of us now have her cold, so we stayed home yesterday instead of going out for a new year dinner, whilst people should have a normal life, I would consider it normal to protect others from any infectious disease, norovirus, cold, chicken pox etc,

Simple precautions and being considerate of others is something we should be doing anyway even if COVID never existed.
xx

Thismonkeysgonetodevon · 01/01/2023 11:22

I’m so very sorry for your loss.

My child has long covid and is extremely poorly so I am following the research and science more than most, and know that it isn’t “just a cold” for everyone.

Covid attacks the immune system and causes multi organ issues, even in mild cases and those vaccinated, and is therefore a very big problem going forward. Many Drs and scientists that I follow argue that this is why we are seeing a huge rise in flu, strep A, and other illnesses, not the three month lockdown we had two and a half years ago.

For those arguing “Well what do you want, we can’t be locked up forever.” We could have a little honestly from the department of public health, we could have mandatory masks in medical settings and on public transport, and we could have clear air filtration systems in schools which are arguably a huge transmitter of covid, flu, strep A etc..

But judging by many other threads on here, there isn’t any public will for these changes. Most people don’t care, until it affects them. I think we live in a very arrogant, ignorant culture sadly.

ZiriForEver · 01/01/2023 11:22

Aposterhasnoname · 01/01/2023 11:09

Genuine question, why do you see it as the responsibility of others to wear ineffectual masks which have done Jack shit in China, rather than the vulnerable and their families wearing FFP2 masks which have been shown to protect the wearer?

Surely it isn't one or the other.
But the math is clear. One mask on the ill wearer protects (decreases the risks for) everyone around. Not only the most vulnerable ones, everyone. Including those who can't afford to take the time off, including those who don't have an option to work from home. Everyone.

And the best thing is no-one needs a government's say so to be able to do it.

It is not ok to walk on the street and stick needles into others. Why are so many on this thread defending walking to the shop and sticking your germs to others when knowingly ill? Sound like the most selfish thing I've ever read here.

LuckySantangelo35 · 01/01/2023 11:23

@IDontCareMatthew

yes you can
you can stay at home if ill rather than spread your germs to others

Chickychoccyegg · 01/01/2023 11:23

I'm very sorry for your loss , such sad news to wake to.

If you don't mind me asking, what age was your cousin? you said elderly, which some may consider 60 years old (still fairly young in my opinion), or up to 90+ years (very elderly, and sadly going to die at some point), not that that makes it any easier for you of course.

Take care, and best wishes.

IDontCareMatthew · 01/01/2023 11:24

@ancientgran are YOU going to pay people to stay at home unpaid then??

LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 01/01/2023 11:24

ancientgran · 01/01/2023 11:15

Decent people with a moral compass don't need a law to know they shouldn't be spreading flu or covid. Next time you moan about not being able to get a GP appointment or about your loved one having their operation delayed just think if you have been spreading covid or flu you are one of the causes for those issues.

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Also this needs to stop - blaming the everyday man for the shit show that is the NHS. Not, you know, the Tories for fucking it up completely.

Dreamsoffreedomjoyandpeace · 01/01/2023 11:24

JanusTheFirst · 01/01/2023 09:25

Thanks for the sympathetic messages. I have DH here so am not alone.

We're trying to think of happier times and good memories.

DS1 has long Covid, so we are very aware of its continued presence. It's just so depressing that some people don't seem to care about the vulnerable any more.

Sorry for your loss. Unfortunately people have never cared about the vulnerable, hence the removal of DLA (now PIP) from thousands, many of whom have committed suicide. It’s not talked about though.

Scooopsahoy · 01/01/2023 11:24

I’m sorry for your loss OP. I hope your cousin lived a happy and fulfilled life.

However what does ‘back to normal’ mean? For me ‘normal’ means accepting that we are mortal and will all die, and that while it’s upsetting for the friends and family it’s entirely normal for someone - especially if they’re old and/or frail to pass away.

‘Normal’ is an acceptance that death is part of life and that we can’t cheat death by trying to rid society of viruses and illnesses completely.

DuchessofSandwich · 01/01/2023 11:24

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I think that we should always be extra cautious around vulnerable people. Other virusses like the flu are also deadly.

IDontCareMatthew · 01/01/2023 11:25

LuckySantangelo35 · 01/01/2023 11:23

@IDontCareMatthew

yes you can
you can stay at home if ill rather than spread your germs to others

Who pays for that then?
And what about the extra stress on colleagues? They will be short staffed so stay on for 13hour days to cover?

LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 01/01/2023 11:26

MarysGirlChildWasLate4ChristmasDay · 01/01/2023 11:17

And lives. Let's not forget that suicides and murders soared as a direct result of COVID measures.

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Yes very good point. For most people they have NO MH provision to access, and MH has soared especially in young people. That’s teenagers more at risk of self harm and suicide, and the system is so overburdened that they are not being helped

PineCone74 · 01/01/2023 11:26

Tukmgru · 01/01/2023 11:17

@Pleasecreateausername13 what on earth are you on about? Without the lockdowns and the jabs many, many more would have died. They both worked.

As to learning to live with it, yes of course up to a point. We have to live with all sorts of diseases but we take precautions, no? We take our vaccines, we stay home when sick so we don’t infect others, we wear condoms…

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Yes, exactly. There is a peculiar attitude that nothing has worked so we won’t do anything at all to help prevent spread, to the extent of mixing with others suspecting or even knowing we are infected.

Twiglets1 · 01/01/2023 11:27

ZiriForEver · 01/01/2023 11:05

I'm not saying it is perfect, but the thread was about elderly (so presumably retired), who are taking precautions on their side (not going to crowded places when unnecessary) so if the other shoppers/commuters do the decent thing, it would significantly help with their risk levels.

I am aware that working with children, especially the small one, comes with meeting illnesses left and right. I don't have a simple solution to that. Still, it doesn't prevent anyone from breaking the chain and just taking mask for those 15 minutes in a shop.

Show quote history

Sorry but it is unrealistic to expect people who have just worked 7 hours in a school where no one is wearing a mask to put on a mask when they pop into Tescos on the way home from work - another place where barely anyone else will be wearing a mask.
The best thing elderly people can do to protect themselves from
viruses is to shop at times that are quiet. We don’t have a culture of mask wearing in this country and that is the reality of the situation. Implying people are selfish for not wearing one will get you nowhere. Actually people are selfish in a hundred different ways,

Newmumatlast · 01/01/2023 11:27

JanusTheFirst · 01/01/2023 09:25

Thanks for the sympathetic messages. I have DH here so am not alone.

We're trying to think of happier times and good memories.

DS1 has long Covid, so we are very aware of its continued presence. It's just so depressing that some people don't seem to care about the vulnerable any more.

I'm so sorry for your loss OP. I think part of the problem is the covid bit is a red herring insofar as that we do need to learn to live with viruses etc to have a functioning society. However, if people are sick they should avoid vulnerable people regardless of whether or not it is covid. Ideally, any infectious illness we should stay home or all mask up depending on what is appropriate and avoid places with lots of people etc. We should be more caring as a society and unfortunately I think its instead full of people who look out for themselves, have a real sense of entitlement in terms of what they expect from the state and others but arent so hot on putting themselves out or giving back.

Proudofitbabe · 01/01/2023 11:27

Most people DO stay in if properly ill, as with any contagious illness. Your cousin probably caught covid from someone who didn't even know they had it. It's awful, but there's no blame to be placed here.

I lost someone unexpectedly last year, and they were much too young and full of life. One thing I hate is their last couple of years were heavily impacted by covid measures, and for what? If 2022 taught me anything it's that life is short. We all need to live it.

LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 01/01/2023 11:27

IDontCareMatthew · 01/01/2023 11:18

Complain?? £2 per person per test....that's £10 a go for us...and you don't test just the once do you?

How can people afford to test an entire family? And what do you do if positive if you are watching your finances? You carry on and go to work, that's what!

Show quote history

Exactly!!!

God some people are so fucking privileged.

Most people who are struggling to spare £2 spare are putting it on the electric meter so they can make their kid’s dinner. Not buying COVID tests because someone has a sniffle

Original poster
JanusTheFirst · 01/01/2023 11:28

She was 73 and very fit and healthy apart from "slowing down a bit".

I am saddened that people just shrug their shoulders and say she was old anyway. As though her life matters less than anyone else's.

She had a lot more left to offer than many people decades younger. And her death was avoidable. That's why I'm cross.

And judging from the attitudes of some here it will only get worse for the elderly and vulnerable.

OP posts:
cookiesbeforepookies · 01/01/2023 11:29

IDontCareMatthew · 01/01/2023 11:24

@ancientgran are YOU going to pay people to stay at home unpaid then??

She’s retired so people who stay home with no sick pay are not her concern.

Athenen0ctua · 01/01/2023 11:29

LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet · 01/01/2023 11:16

Regarding “it’s back to normal” - no it’s not because vulnerable people and people who’ve lost their homes and businesses due to unnecessary and OTT lockdowns are still poor, jobless and homeless and taxpayers such as myself will spend the rest of their lives paying for the effects of the government’s stupid choices during the pandemic.

A family member lost quality time with her partner who has dementia. Being trapped in their home day after day, not able to walk to the pub for some much needed social time, or to be picked up by family and taken out, she believes hastened his decline. She lost that last year with him when he was still able to do those things. Would have been far kinder to have that time and risk covid taking him.