I can’t take her to her friends party can I?

[MissingOutAgain]

7 year old DD.

Has a cold I think.

No temperature, negative LFT, slight cough but she is asthmatic. Very snotty.

She’s fine in herself, eating and drinking fine, but very very snotty, blowing her nose and sneezing a lot. She’s been to school today but was sent home after lunch due to the snotty nose, told to test her.

She’s had covid over Christmas and was really ill with it, ended up in hospital for 48 hours and has only just gone back to school full time (since half term). She’s also only just returned to her activities and is still on medication due to effects of covid.

I can’t take her to her friends party tomorrow can I? She’s so excited and so desperate to go but I don’t think the other parents would appreciate it. Yet again her poor immune system means she’s missing out.

Just moaning as it always seems to be when she’s looking forward to something she gets ill. She missed a school trip last half term due to her recovering from covid, and she loves her activities as well and her friends.

But I’ll do the right thing.

Of course, who wouldn’t want to stay home and get paid when they’re pretty much ok?!

Most work places would suggest working from home if you’re infectious
Not sure how a nurse treats you from home, how the tesco staff scan your items from home, how the mechanic mends your exhaust from home, how the electrician fixes your lights from home, how the plumber sorts your central heating from home, how the careworker changes a pad from home, how the train driver drives the train from home, the policeman catches the burglars from home, the fireman put fires out from home, the lollipop lady stops the traffic from home, the delivery drivers get the parcels dropped off from home...... but yes of course most employers will suggest working from home

@5zeds

Nobody suggested “not leaving the house” though did they? What was said was don’t take your sick child to a birthday party. Most work places would suggest working from home if you’re infectious but ok. In parts of the Far East it is good manners to wear a face mask if you feel unwell and need to go to work.

Actually many people did. What's the difference between being out somewhere else and a party?

Also, I only know one or two people who have the option to work at home, it really isn't compatible with every job. Of the people I do know who wfh is an option for, none of them would be allowed to do it simply for having a common cold.

Whereas the majority of people I know can work from home and certainly could if they were feeling ill but still felt well enough to work. Obviously you are more likely to pass on a cold at a party than outside or sat down in a cafe. Honestly it’s not rocketscience.

@TotalRhubarb Of course, who wouldn’t want to stay home and get paid when they’re pretty much ok?! some people like to work in an office, some prefer wfh. It sounds like you think wfh is not working though, which it isn’t.

@5zeds

Whereas the majority of people I know can work from home and certainly could if they were feeling ill but still felt well enough to work. Obviously you are more likely to pass on a cold at a party than outside or sat down in a cafe. Honestly it’s not rocketscience.

So you wouldn't go to a party in case you infect someone but going to a cafe and passing something on to the people serving you is fine?

We're talking about a cold fgs, when did people stop being able to go about their daily business with a cold 🙄

[quote 5zeds]**@TotalRhubarb* Of course, who wouldn’t want to stay home and get paid when they’re pretty much ok?!* some people like to work in an office, some prefer wfh. It sounds like you think wfh is not working though, which it isn’t.[/quote]
You’re splitting hairs now. The crux of it is you think people with colds should isolate, and others of us think that would be an impractical over-reaction.

I think people who are infectious be it with a cold, d&v, or chicken pox should not be attending children’s birthday parties or work if they can avoid it.

I’d agree with you for d&v and chicken pox. A cold? Nah. Not practical, given how frequent they are, especially for children, and how mild they are for the vast, vast majority.

I’d also be worried about the effect on immune response if we were to try to isolate for every harmless bug. I see in the paper today that there are worries that flu may hit harder now, precisely because we’ve been isolating and so immunity will have dropped. It doesn’t make sense to me to open oneself up to a potentially greater harm to avoid a lesser one.

Not practical, given how frequent they are
And you see no connection between the frequency of catching contagious disease and how often you turn up contagious??
I honestly don’t think you need to court infection in the way you are suggesting. We are interacting with many many more people than at any point in history. Parents in separate offices, children in larger schools sometimes with multiple class groupings in a day, transport back and forth, super markets, clubs and churches. Your immune system will get a work out without you even trying.

@5zeds

Not practical, given how frequent they are And you see no connection between the frequency of catching contagious disease and how often you turn up contagious?? I honestly don’t think you need to court infection in the way you are suggesting. We are interacting with many many more people than at any point in history. Parents in separate offices, children in larger schools sometimes with multiple class groupings in a day, transport back and forth, super markets, clubs and churches. Your immune system will get a work out without you even trying.

To a degree I see your point. However:

• if the last 2 years show us anything, it’s that it’s nigh on impossible to stop the spread of highly contagious illnesses with isolation. Spread may be reduced or slowed, but that’s the most we can hope for. Once the genie’s out of the bottle, that’s pretty much it, barring a fully effective, sterilising vaccine.

• the social and economic costs of isolation are huge and probably not yet fully appreciated. It’s only worth the trade off if the illness is properly dangerous. But we’re talking about the common cold here, not Ebola. So the trade off is not worth it.

• for some groups, eg small children in nursery, no amount of isolating when ill will stop minor infections like colds doing the rounds. What happens to their social development and their parents’ employment if they’re out of nursery more than they’re in it? We could never hope to stop colds circulating there. Don’t forget that many viral and bacterial infections are contagious before symptoms show.

• many employers want bums on seats because they don’t trust their employees not to play hookey when they’re supposed to be working at home. Even employers whose staff are professionals. Especially those sorts of employees in my experience! If you wanted to argue that bespeaks antiquated and ineffective management practices, I would agree with you, but it is what it is.

And all this for a cold!

It’s just a cold. Not that terrible. Self-limiting.

I think we just need to crack on with life now. If she feels up to it let her go. Going by the symptoms a pp posted I'm guessing loads of kids have had it, parents thinking it's just a cold so not bothering to test etc etc. There's no law Re testing anymore so I'd just let her go. Obviously if really poorly you wouldn't take her anyway.

I don’t think anyone thinks it’s covid, we’re just discussing different attitudes/manners surrounding minor illness.

I think one of the very few positives to come out of the pandemic is the ability to work from home has been demonstrated. For us that means far less living apart and a far more engaged workforce actively thinking about how they would like to work. I personally think it’s rude at best to attend a party when ill. I thought it before 2019 and still think so now.

I still think it's rude to attend a party when you have a cold "very very snotty nose and sneezing a lot "

I wouldn't do it.

It is not now, and never has been, decent behavior to attend a gathering while exhibiting symptoms of a contagious disease.

Whether one in fact has such disease or something more innocuous.

Incredible that people need to be told this.

I wouldn't take mine to a birthday party when snotty, even before covid buy I don't think others do the same. Dd went to a party recently and all the kids were sneezy, snotty and coughing. Dd got ill a few days later with a nasty cough (but was not covid), it wasn't kids she'd normally have contact with either!