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Annoyed that masks can be a way that people are judged

344 replies

Twattergy · 04/02/2022 22:06

I went to a hairdresser today. All staff wearing masks. I asked on entry ' do you require me to wear a mask?' and receptionist said 'no we can't force you to, it's up to you'. So I didn't put one on. I had one with me, but now it isn't mandatory, I made my choice based on fact that I have been tripled jabbed and recovered from covid 2 weeks ago. I kept having the urge to tell the staff 'I have been tripled jabbed and recently recovered from covid which is the main reason I'm not wearing a mask'..but I thought why should I have to justify this? Any of the masked people in there could be unvaccinated, or even knowingly have symptoms of Covid, but because they are wearing a mask it is assumed they are doing 'the right thing'. And me in no mask, I think many people would assume I'm being anti social, when in fact I have been highly responsible with vaccination. I'm annoyed at the huge potential for judgements around mask wearing now that it isn't mandatory. (I would wear a mask where is is mandatory eg London transport or health care settings BTW I'm not a radical anti masker). Ifnyou were sat next to me in the hairdresser would you judge me? Would you want me to tell you I was fully vaxxed and recently recovered?

OP posts:
user1481840227 · 05/02/2022 05:11

@ADisgruntledPelican

Imagine feeling the need to make up alternate scenarios just so you could argue with a worried parent. Confused
But there was a very very obvious and possible alternate scenario.

There is no proof at all that that man was the one who passed on covid.

People cough, people have always coughed for various reasons, they often still need to leave the house for various reasons.

That man could have known what his cough was from. He might have known that he could not have had covid at that time, testing or very recent immunity. He might have been unable to wear a mask.

VashtaNerada · 05/02/2022 05:22

Hairdressers are particularly vulnerable at the moment due to the nature of their job. I wouldn’t want to cause them any additional anxiety personally.

PAFMO · 05/02/2022 05:50

@Twattergy

Positive comments, nice to hear. Yes I didn't judge those wearing masks - it's fine if you want or need to keep using one. I did feel the odd one out despite being comfortable with my choice.
Yet you felt the need to start a thread criticising the way you were spoken to. Your definition of "judgemental" needs tweaking.
PAFMO · 05/02/2022 05:53

@NotJustACigar

I would judge you - I'd think there was a small possibility you couldn't wear a mask for a good reason but that most likely you were just selfish and/or ignorant. Telling me you vax status would just be weird and not particularly relevant.
I've started to look at any "I'm fully vaccinated btw" followed (usually) by either anti-vax, anti-mask, anti-restriction rhetoric as the 2020's version of "I'm not racist but".
pollygartertidywife · 05/02/2022 06:11

@palacegirl77

Wouldnt judge you or care to be honest. Being as masks wont stop transmission the best line of defence is the vax (which also doesnt stop you catching it) and as I know Ive had 3, I wouldnt be concerned.
Factually incorrect. Wearing a mask along with vaccination are amongst the precautions that limit transmission. Along with hand washing and ventilation.

Inside amongst people such as a hairdresser salon there is no way I would diminish my chance of passing on a deadly virus. The fact I was triple jabbed and recently had Covid would mean I would wear a mask out of respect to others . Seeing as you had not told them this .

pollygartertidywife · 05/02/2022 06:19

The reason to stop wearing masks was entirely political. It was AGAINST the public health advice .

Johnson needed something people would be pleased about because he is in the shit and clearly didn't have the brain power to observe the public health advice despite almost daily briefings from epidemiology and virus experts.

Political decisions do not lead to sensible public health ones. I would personally listen to the scientists over an imbecile out for his own aggrandisement.

Holly60 · 05/02/2022 06:22

I don’t think it so much about who is judging who, but more about putting people at their ease, especially if it is in their place of work.

If I walked into a hairdressers and all the staff were wearing masks, it would pretty bloomin obvious they would prefer me to wear a mask too. So I would.

I don’t love wearing a mask but if I notice someone wearing one in a group setting I realise they might be feeling nervous or vulnerable, and so I will pop mine up as an act of kindness to them - to put them more at their ease. If someone isn’t wearing their mask I’ll leave mine down as I chat to them. It’s just about being a considerate person really.

stayathomer · 05/02/2022 06:22

We had a lady come into the shop today and ask the same question as you. In the two minutes of her being served she brought it up again twice and I moved closer to the girl serving her to help step in in case the lady started trouble. Afterwards agreed that she's either gotten a lot of stick from people for it or was out for trouble. People who talk about being jabbed etc, my personal opinion is they could suck it up and wear a mask- you cough, sneeze or laugh you'll spread something, but I don't mind just please don't make people uncomfortable by bringing it up constantly (I don't mean you OP, I mean people in general!)

pollygartertidywife · 05/02/2022 06:43

There are currently 501 people on mechanical ventilators with Covid. This time last year it was 3506 which is undoubtedly the fabulous effect of vaccination.

However last year when ventilation and cases were at todays levels . (April last year) the government introduced 'Step 2' where you could only have indoor visitors from your household or support bubble or meet in groups of six outside. Masks were mandatory in all shops and inside settings.

Do not believe politicians. ! They change the rules related to their popularity. Not the state of the pandemic.

Jacaranda75 · 05/02/2022 06:46

I would judge you for the same reason that I would judge a man who refused to wear a condom.

WiseUpJanetWeiss · 05/02/2022 06:53

@Twattergy

Positive comments, nice to hear. Yes I didn't judge those wearing masks - it's fine if you want or need to keep using one. I did feel the odd one out despite being comfortable with my choice.
You clearly don’t feel really comfortable though do you, hence this thread? No-one likes to feel judged.

People need to make their own choices and crack on. I wear a FFP2 mask now to protect myself. It’s valveless, so it also protects others who can’t wear a FFP2 mask from me (I’d judge myself as an inconsiderate idiot otherwise 😁).

Everyone else can do what they like based on their own priorities and how much they want/need to reduce their own risks. My priority is not getting Covid so I can go on holiday at half term and so I can visit my DM in her care home and take her out places. Other people will very reasonably prioritise other things.

I’ll probably be less bothered as time goes on, but I’ll probably always wear a FFP2 on a plane now, having had a previous long haul holiday partly ruined by getting a horrible respiratory virus from a snivelling bloke in the next seat on the plane.

MarshaBradyo · 05/02/2022 06:53

Blimey at some of these responses..

I went to the hairdresser the other day and no one was wearing a mask

I’d choose that over somewhere else

FiddlefigOnTheRoof · 05/02/2022 06:54

No one knows all the reasons why you are lower risk of passing on covid. Vulnerable people would look at you and feel anxious. So even though I’m triple boosted and recovered in the last two months, I wear one. Not so people think I’m altruistic, but because I don’t want anxious people to worry.

MrsLargeEmbodied · 05/02/2022 06:56

i would think you were pig headed or ignorant

Tara336 · 05/02/2022 07:04

I’m continuing to wear a mask, I am immune compromised because of a drug I have to take. I had someone tell me I don’t have to wear a mask anymore and was highly critical of the fact I had it on. I don’t demand to know why someone is not wearing one so why should I have to justify my choice? I will do my best not to catch COVID (again) as I still feel awful 2 months later probably because my immune system is struggling still

astrocean · 05/02/2022 07:13

I think a good way to avoid this is to re-word your question, OP. Maybe instead of saying "Do you require me to wear a mask?'", which comes across as a bit hostile and could get people's backs up from the off, ask "would you like me to wear a mask?" instead. That's what I do. Most people say "no it's fine" and then the environment remains pleasant and friendly.

Twattergy · 05/02/2022 07:23

Really interesting to get this range of responses. I am concluding that some people would judge me negatively; some people wouldn't. So, cant win. Some go as far as assuming I'm unvaxxinated, or that anyone wearing a mask is more responsible in relation to covid than someone not wearing a mask. Which has no logic at all. People saying it is courteous or good for mental health to wear a mask have the strongest argument, I think that is a good point.

OP posts:
MarshaBradyo · 05/02/2022 07:26

@Twattergy

Really interesting to get this range of responses. I am concluding that some people would judge me negatively; some people wouldn't. So, cant win. Some go as far as assuming I'm unvaxxinated, or that anyone wearing a mask is more responsible in relation to covid than someone not wearing a mask. Which has no logic at all. People saying it is courteous or good for mental health to wear a mask have the strongest argument, I think that is a good point.
I think that’s why I appreciated where I went, since no one was wearing one there couldn’t be judgement from anyone.

Was freeing and nice to have the normality

Twattergy · 05/02/2022 07:26

I didn't ask in an aggressive way, and I paraphrased in my OP, I didn't use the word 'required' I said something like 'is it masks here?' whilst smiling and pulling mask from my pocket.

OP posts:
ufucoffee · 05/02/2022 07:29

I don't care if I'm being judged by not wearing one

TyrannosaurusRegina · 05/02/2022 07:30

To directly answer your question - yes, I would judge you.

PaddleBoardingMomma · 05/02/2022 07:31

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halfsiesonapotnoodle · 05/02/2022 07:44

Masks protect others. I can't believe some people choose not to wear such a simple thing to help protect everyone. I was on a train yesterday and most people didn't wear one, coughed randomly and I sat there, wearing mine, judging everyone and praying I haven't picked it up.

Undertheoldlindentree · 05/02/2022 07:47

National decision-making around masks is a mixture of protecting health services and politics. Removal of the restrictions doesn’t mean the risk or transmission has gone away, just that the levels across the population can be managed currently.

The close proximity in hair dressing, all day long, every day of the week, means the staff are more likely to pick up an airborne virus than most of us. That still affects their health, family, work and the business overall.

Understandably they probably prefer everyone to wear a mask. Regardless of vaccination status or past infection, I wouldn't mind at all if close-proximity workers had the right to ask customers to wear a mask.

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