'PTSD' from the past 2 years?

[PolkaDot456]

PTSD may be an exaggerated description of what I am identifying but reading how angry people are regarding the No.10 drinks party, I feel we're collectively having a moment of reflection.

We're now all thinking about what we were doing in May 2020 and the passage of time since, we have actually come really far but this whole situation I think had made a lot of us begin processing the last two years would you agree?

I do feel as though I've been through something quite traumatic, and I had lockdown super-easy but struggled with anxiety triggered by the pandemic so I followed the rules and then some.

On reflection I feel I've done well - WE'VE done well as a society - to have come this far and kept moving forward in our lives in difficult circumstances.

But I get a heavy feeling when I think back, it's almost overwhelming and I can't seem to go there, its like a mental block. I'm in a good place aside from the pandemic so I'm not sure why I'm struggling to process it!

Reading back on some of the rules, before they came in, I'd never have believed they'd happen(parks locked up away from the kids for one ), at the time we realised it all seemed far fetched and now thinking back, I can't believe we were manipulated into the extreme behaviour and had so much taken away from us!

I realise this may be a bit of a self indulgence post! But I am interested to hear if other people are feeling similar during this collective reflection!?

Some people are very attached to the idea that the rules were necessary, better than the alternative and the sacrifices were worthwhile. But even if you come from a pro lockdown perspective, it's still possible and desirable to critically interrogate measures. You can agree with school closures whilst not pretending it was anything other than inexcusable for a group of children to be the only group not able to see a friend outdoors.

[quote BigMoan]@Mycatsgoldtooth

But it’s fully ok to dismiss my experience? My not being able to get to someone very, very dear to me? Her bleeding, soiling herself? Having to clear up her faeces from the floor because she had to wait for her op? While caring for 2 children, one waiting for an ASD diagnosis and the other needing homeschooling?

I’m not allowed to say that I thought it was critical to support the NHS?[/quote]
And now who is weaponising suffering?

Saying that people sharing their and their family's trauma was "weaponising children's mental health" was one of THE most arseholeish and insensitive things I've read on this website - and over the last 2 years, the bar for that was already appallingly low.

As for the weaponised mental health - the bulk of the studies are still currently in the peer review process and at the preprint stage - but I have a lever arch file that's 3 inches thick with academic articles and articles from official bodies (likes of Ofsted, EEF, gov.uk etc) about just how much fucking harm we've done to this generation of kids (I'm in the middle of an academic dissertation about it).

We will NOT be silenced by people trying to rewrite history or telling us that this generation of kids don't matter and that we're some kind of nefarious right wing organisation for just trying to get them their lives, their education and their childhood.

@CoffeeWithCheese I agree - the harm we have inflicted on young people in shameful. Please tell their story.

I have read ‘but children are resilient’ many times on this (parenting!) forum, in response to posters expressing concern about silenced, regressed, neglected or abused youngsters. The lack of interest and care has been callous indeed.

I am not anti lockdown but chaining up playgrounds while they opened outdoor golf ranges for adults is just one example of appalling behaviour. We could have continued in lockdown / restrictions with playgrounds open. I’m lucky to have access to a garden with a swing and slide etc. I cannot imagine the claustrophobia of not being able to access outside space of my own and walking past a locked playground.

On the comments about resilience. Yes, many children and adults are very resilient. However, this does not prevent mental health problems. Mental health problems are not a moral failing or evidence of lack of resilience.

@Mickarooni I agree about resilience. However ‘but children are resilient’ has been used on his forum repeatedly to shut down discussion about whether we were doing irreparable harm to young people. It often read as lazy and callous.

@Mickarooni

I am not anti lockdown but chaining up playgrounds while they opened outdoor golf ranges for adults is just one example of appalling behaviour. We could have continued in lockdown / restrictions with playgrounds open. I’m lucky to have access to a garden with a swing and slide etc. I cannot imagine the claustrophobia of not being able to access outside space of my own and walking past a locked playground.

I remember the day our local council unlocked the playgrounds - took the kids down to the local park and one of the lads from their class saw the open playground and ran into it shouting "Oh my God it IS true"

He should never have been in a place (apart from possibly as a drunk uni student) where an unchained set of swings is THAT much of a source of joy.

[quote Flyonawalk]@Mickarooni I agree about resilience. However ‘but children are resilient’ has been used on his forum repeatedly to shut down discussion about whether we were doing irreparable harm to young people. It often read as lazy and callous.[/quote]
Absolutely, I am in agreement. I was just saying that children are resilient but it does not mean they aren’t being harmed mentally or emotionally. It’s worrying.

@Mickarooni Totally agree with you.

I happen to know a number of families with disabled children and/or who care for young people with complex additional needs.

The effect of being locked away, with no respite, no basic care needs met and no support, which extended for months, has been awful. The impact on the mental and sometimes physical health of those families has been frankly devastating.

The reasons for requiring lockdown are not in debate here. The effect on those families, of hearing about partying when they struggled to keep afloat every day, makes me feel absolute rage.

@Mickarooni

I am not anti lockdown but chaining up playgrounds while they opened outdoor golf ranges for adults is just one example of appalling behaviour. We could have continued in lockdown / restrictions with playgrounds open. I’m lucky to have access to a garden with a swing and slide etc. I cannot imagine the claustrophobia of not being able to access outside space of my own and walking past a locked playground.

That was truly grim. A quirk in regulations here in Glasgow meant that pubs opened about a week before playparks. I took my then two year old DS (he’s 4 now) to a golf course and got told off by some wanker for having the pushchair on the green. I didn’t even know what the fucking ‘green’ was.

@CoffeeWithCheese

As for the weaponised mental health - the bulk of the studies are still currently in the peer review process and at the preprint stage - but I have a lever arch file that's 3 inches thick with academic articles and articles from official bodies (likes of Ofsted, EEF, gov.uk etc) about just how much fucking harm we've done to this generation of kids (I'm in the middle of an academic dissertation about it).

We will NOT be silenced by people trying to rewrite history or telling us that this generation of kids don't matter and that we're some kind of nefarious right wing organisation for just trying to get them their lives, their education and their childhood.

Hear Hear! Good luck with your dissertation.

I went for a long run on the morning of Saturday 4th July 2020 and passed the local playground as the bolt was being cut off. I burst into teared and sobbed "you have no idea how happy it makes me to see you do that" to the council worker.

I've spoken up for children all the way through. I've talked about how restrictions traded off one set of deaths for another. How the seeds for future suicides were being sown for people struggling. So many MNers did not like their cosy rainbows and banana-bread while saving the grannies world being popped with such talk.

If we're talking about children and weaponising, it's now in clear sight that children like Arthur Labinjo-Hughes did not survive lockdown because it was the perfect opportunity for their abusers to hide their crimes away and agencies to fail to react coz Covid. The full extent may never be clear and agencies are still catching up with the aftermath. Lockdown removed children from their safe places, chance of disclosure and scrutiny.

But the few that spoke up about the inevitable in 2020 had their arses handed to them. And where the hell were the children's charities to advocate?

@BogRollBOGOF I remember your clear-sighted posts. It was obvious to me too that we were sacrificing the most vulnerable, that is the youngest and poorest, who inevitably had no voice and least power.

I don’t believe lockdown will have saved lives in the long run. I think we simply sacrificed some people to supposedly save others.

@CoffeeWithCheese - Good luck! It's so important this kind of information gets shared so we never find ourselves in the same position again. I remember reading about the children in Spain who were literally not allowed to leave their houses at all during their first lockdown and it chilling me to the bone. I work in a school and so saw the impact on the children I work with first hand. When some came back they could hardly run as they'd put on so much weight and so many more are still struggling with anxiety and social interaction. I ended up leaving my union over the way they refused to prioritise children's welfare.

I'm not a member of Us4Them but I can't really understand why they have such a terrible image on here as surely children's rights are something we should all be fighting to uphold?

Bogroll, you have been a voice of sanity throughout. ❤️

Well said @BogRollBOGOF we will be quite rightly be judged harshly by future generations for the way we treated children in this.

I will never forget the dystopian horror of taking my kids to the playpark in April 2020 to find it locked up with a padlock and violent STAY HOME signs

@CoffeeWithCheese- Good luck! It's so important this kind of information gets shared so we never find ourselves in the same position again. I remember reading about the children in Spain who were literally not allowed to leave their houses at all during their first lockdown and it chilling me to the bone. I work in a school and so saw the impact on the children I work with first hand. When some came back they could hardly run as they'd put on so much weight and so many more are still struggling with anxiety and social interaction. I ended up leaving my union over the way they refused to prioritise children's welfare.

Bet their child obesity rates increased because of lockdown. Ours did.

I don’t understand why there was no push for concrete mitigations in schools. And more outdoor time allowed for children. Absolutely nuts.

Another ptsd moment. January 2021 two
Policemen watching us play in the park from a distance for a whole hour. The park looked like The Somme it was so muddy. I was 7 months pregnant still weak from a nasty bout of covid. I was alone there with a two year old and a five year old. My oldest asked me “mummy will they put you in prison for being out”. Was hard to persuade him to go back to the park the next day.
What covid threat were we? Did that use resources wisely? Did that save a life or free up a hospital bed. It all makes me so cross.
I know it’s insignificant in the scheme of things but someone made that decision to send them there to intimidate parents and children playing.

@Mycatsgoldtooth

Another ptsd moment. January 2021 two Policemen watching us play in the park from a distance for a whole hour. The park looked like The Somme it was so muddy. I was 7 months pregnant still weak from a nasty bout of covid. I was alone there with a two year old and a five year old. My oldest asked me “mummy will they put you in prison for being out”. Was hard to persuade him to go back to the park the next day. What covid threat were we? Did that use resources wisely? Did that save a life or free up a hospital bed. It all makes me so cross. I know it’s insignificant in the scheme of things but someone made that decision to send them there to intimidate parents and children playing.

I don't think it's insignificant at all.

@Mycatsgoldtooth I don’t think that’s insignificant either. Just very sad.

I remember being shocked at how fast my then 2 year old DS adapted to giving people a wide berth on pavements. Which is obviously what we were told to do, but I felt a bit sad thinking how fast he internalised the idea that you need to stay away from people.