If you’re trying to decide whether to go to a Christmas party

[AchillesLastStand]

Victoria Derbyshire on Twitter has shared that her triple vaccinated brother contracted omicron at a Christmas meal out. Out of 21 one of them 17 have now tested positive.

twitter.com/vicderbyshire/status/1469354766560026624

Imagine thousands of similar mini super-spreading events up and down the country this week and where that could lead.

I understand that there is a significant concern at the spread of Omicron, & that there are limits on the capacity of the NHS.
If protecting the NHS is the aim, is it worth asking why activities that lead to other diseases which also use the NHS are not targeted as much as those, such as indoor socialisation, which lead to Covid?
Off the top of my head I don't think it'd be unreasonable to suggest that actual or effective(via tax) prohibition of alcohol, tobacco, red meat, fast food, certain kinds of contact sport would all likely result in a net decline in the NHS burden. It may not result in the immediate burden saving that reduced socialisation may have due to Omicron's apparent virulence, but it would reduce the medium term need. As would say temporary prohibition of having more than 2 children. Or imposing a national speed limit of 35mph for non emergency private vehicles. I'm not saying that these should happen, but they are all examples of things which could reduce the strain on the NHS, along with many bad consequences too
Then there is the question of who decides what level of "strain" is acceptable on health services. To some extent, is there an argument that the point of a health service is to be under strain and respond to it as best it can? Or should income tax be raised significantly (or a wealth tax introduced) and the NHS budget doubled (or tripled, or quadrupled?)

Op your going by your own situation and you seem to not understand if everyone stoped going out where would that leave hospitality? Seriously last year most were shut at Christmas well they were where I live so for people not to go over Christmas again would be catastrophic and yes the economy does trump covid .

Anyone with kids in school (or anyone who works in a school) knows they're much more at risk of catching covid there than at a Christmas party.

@AchillesLastStand

Thanks for kind comments everyone. I spent for the first lockdown simultaneously teaching my 6 year old and university students because unlike teachers I didn’t qualify for keyworker status. Meanwhile my son’s teacher uploaded a few works sheets from Twinkle on the school website and then spent the whole day with her toddler.

As a result my son now has SEN and I’m terrified of another lockdown and schools closing and him getting even further behind. I can’t put into words the guilt I feel for this. I feel like live let him down because I wasn’t able to teach him adequately. I know lots of parents feel like this.

Also during the last lockdown last winter I was having a mental breakdown after struggling with severe anxiety and depression all my life. I was under the CMHT before Covid hit but like so many of us with mental illness it’s got so much worse.

The reason I’m so angry about unnecessary social mixing right now is that it will lead to another lockdown without a doubt. I don’t know how I’ll cope. People will commit suicide because our government can’t govern not because people went to parties.

I was in exactly the same position as you Op BUT I feel very differently.

I couldn't cope with schools closing again but if that happens I will NOT blame the general public for acting within the law.

The main reason the NHS is likely to be overwhelmed is because it's a complete shitshow due to years of underfunding and poor management.

I have multiple friends who work in hospitality and they need to make money this Christmas or it's highly likely they'll lose everything. They all have young children too .... it's heartbreaking to watch.
I will continue to support the hospitality industry where I can. I'll wear a mask, test regularly, get my booster and follow the restrictions that are in place. In no way does that make me selfish.

He fell way behind with his education because of lockdown. He’s now classified as having SEN because of the education he’s lost. Why is that so hard to comprehend?

It would be unusual for one child to be classified as having SEN for being so far behind rather than the whole class of the teacher was just giving them a couple of worksheets. Surely everyone would be in the same boat?

I get it OP, it’s shit. This whole situation is. But projecting what you think is the correct course of action onto everyone else and inevitably blaming them when it all fucks up again isn’t helpful for anyone. You can’t blame people for being cynical about the latest guidelines. People are fed up and are going to do what they want. We’re way past the point of expecting people to limit their own actions when it now seems to be never ending.

@BarefootHippieChick

Anyone with kids in school (or anyone who works in a school) knows they're much more at risk of catching covid there than at a Christmas party.

I agree the risk of them catching it at school is higher.

However the combined risk of catching it at school or at a Christmas party is significantly higher than catching it at school alone 🤦🏽‍♀️

The amount of people saying "my kids might catch it at school so f*ck it, I may as well do whatever I want"

What's the difference between cancelling all our plans to avoid a lockdown and being IN lockdown?

@HesBoughtAFuckingHat

He fell way behind with his education because of lockdown. He’s now classified as having SEN because of the education he’s lost. Why is that so hard to comprehend?

It would be unusual for one child to be classified as having SEN for being so far behind rather than the whole class of the teacher was just giving them a couple of worksheets. Surely everyone would be in the same boat?

I get it OP, it’s shit. This whole situation is. But projecting what you think is the correct course of action onto everyone else and inevitably blaming them when it all fucks up again isn’t helpful for anyone. You can’t blame people for being cynical about the latest guidelines. People are fed up and are going to do what they want. We’re way past the point of expecting people to limit their own actions when it now seems to be never ending.

A lot of the mums at my son’s school during the first lockdown were middle class stay at home mums. They used to post photos on the school website of what activities their kids were doing. It turned into a competition which I hated.

We moved house in September and my son now attends another school in a more deprived area but it’s a much better school in terms of the quality of education he’s receiving and they picked up on his SEN and put a support plan in place. He’s in a much smaller class which helps.

The situation is shit. It feels we’re going to relive the developments of last Christmas. I sure Johnson will be on the TV this week telling us all to have a cautious Christmas. I feel a lot of anger towards the government and I apologise that I projected onto posters on this thread who are going to pre-Christmas gatherings.

I’m mentally trying to prepare myself for another lockdown and schools closing but it’s not working. This time last year I started self harming at the prospect of having to manage homeschooling again. I just can’t cope with it.

@SandrasAnnoyingFriend

What's the difference between cancelling all our plans to avoid a lockdown and being IN lockdown?

There was an interesting article in today's Telegraph asking that very question

I'm due to party with 2300 of my closest friends at a libertines gig at the weekend.

When stuff like that's still going on I'm not sure people should be missing out on drinks with friends!

It’s too late - we’re all going to get Covid.

@ThinkAboutItTomorrow

I'm due to party with 2300 of my closest friends at a libertines gig at the weekend.

When stuff like that's still going on I'm not sure people should be missing out on drinks with friends!

Love it! Have a great time!

What's the difference between cancelling all our plans to avoid a lockdown and being IN lockdown?
Because missing a few parties isn’t more important than schools, ICU wards, cancer operations, business survival.

What's the difference between cancelling all our plans to avoid a lockdown and being IN lockdown?
Because missing a few parties isn’t more important than schools, ICU wards, cancer operations, business survival.

What's the difference between cancelling all our plans to avoid a lockdown and being IN lockdown?
Because missing a few parties isn’t more important than schools, ICU wards, cancer operations, business survival.

@AlecTrevelyan006

It’s too late - we’re all going to get Covid.

Of course we are. A variant that is currently responsible for 40% of cases in London but will be responsible for 50% by tomorrow is going to get absolutely everywhere. Thinking you can avoid catching it forever is a bit like thinking you can avoid catching a cold forever.

I work in hospitality, we need people to come in and spend money.
If sales forcasts are not met, labour budgets get cut which means my hours go down.
Sales are way down from this time 2 years ago.
It's not fair to discourage people from going out but not giving assistance.
Im absolutely dreading the new year.

^Because missing a few parties isn’t more important than schools, ICU wards, cancer operations, business survival"

The above comment is relatively typical of a certain type of thinking prevalent during the pandemic which creates an oppositional tension between socialising which is automatically painted as frivolous and selfish in the blue corner, & education, commerce, a serious disease and ICU wards in the Red corner.
Firstly there is the issue that some businesses are in sectors which depend on socialisation. Then there is the way in which the ballast is loaded against socialisation. Let's say the blue corner was ICU wards. Would they, alone, qualify as more important than business, cancer operations and schools? And who gets to decide how much importance is accorded to each? Is there any cumulative value associated to the missed socialisation? So say this Christmas, the next 2 or the next 10 all feature radically reduced socialisation.

I do think it is worth trying to have a nuanced debate about this and it does begun to feel like the thin end of the wedge when socialisation is on the road to becoming demonised like this.

@AchillesLastStand I've just seen your update.

Last Christmas I started self harming for the first time in decades. I was prescribed antidepressants, again for the first time in decades. I'm not far off the same again now, to be honest. Since last year I've started immunosuppressant drugs for my RA and as a result my life is pretty much nonexistent. Only difference is, this year everyone is able to be out and about and I can't - so it actually feels worse for me. At the same time though I can't bear the thought of others denying themselves doing all the things that make life living to protect me (obviously I can only speak for myself and not all CEV). I'm also painfully aware that my vulnerability is fucking up DH's life, too, because he can't go anywhere either.

I understand why you feel so frustrated a little bit better now. I'm sorry if I seemed a bit harsh in my previous posts to you. I actually get where you're coming from.

^Because missing a few parties isn’t more important than schools, ICU wards, cancer operations, business survival"

The above comment is relatively typical of a certain type of thinking prevalent during the pandemic which creates an oppositional tension between socialising which is automatically painted as frivolous and selfish in the blue corner, & education, commerce, a serious disease and ICU wards in the Red corner.
Firstly there is the issue that some businesses are in sectors which depend on socialisation. Then there is the way in which the ballast is loaded against socialisation. Let's say the blue corner was ICU wards. Would they, alone, qualify as more important than business, cancer operations and schools? And who gets to decide how much importance is accorded to each? Is there any cumulative value associated to the missed socialisation? So say this Christmas, the next 2 or the next 10 all feature radically reduced socialisation.

I do think it is worth trying to have a nuanced debate about this and it does begun to feel like the thin end of the wedge when socialisation is on the road to becoming demonised like this.

@LemonSwan

Surely the cause of this is someone not bothering to LFT before hand?

I just had a packed weekend of social events and every single one, everyone attending was asked to and did an LFT.

Surely that is the solution rather than cancelling everything?

Except so did my friend. Off she went for a pre holiday pcr and 💥she was positive

[quote TheVampiresWife]@AchillesLastStand I've just seen your update.

Last Christmas I started self harming for the first time in decades. I was prescribed antidepressants, again for the first time in decades. I'm not far off the same again now, to be honest. Since last year I've started immunosuppressant drugs for my RA and as a result my life is pretty much nonexistent. Only difference is, this year everyone is able to be out and about and I can't - so it actually feels worse for me. At the same time though I can't bear the thought of others denying themselves doing all the things that make life living to protect me (obviously I can only speak for myself and not all CEV). I'm also painfully aware that my vulnerability is fucking up DH's life, too, because he can't go anywhere either.

I understand why you feel so frustrated a little bit better now. I'm sorry if I seemed a bit harsh in my previous posts to you. I actually get where you're coming from.

[/quote]
Thanks for that @TheVampiresWife. It really means a lot. It’s really hard isn’t it? I’m on antidepressants and sometimes sleeping tablets. My psychiatrist has been brilliant checking in how I’m doing on zoom. I feel very blessed to have such brilliant mental health services.

Life sounds really hard for you. I’m sorry that I came across patronising! Part of me thinks maybe this lockdown won’t materialise because scientists are saying it may be impossible to control omicron even with a lockdown with so many key workers having to work and then be off sick in huge numbers if they all contract at the same time.

We’ll just have to see how this all plays out.

I hope things improve for you once we’re over this bump.💐

Even if everyone in your party does a ltf beforehand, you come to my restaurant, none of us have tested, none of us can afford to be off sick.
I could spend 5 minutes at your table taking an order, I'll come back to check you got everything and that its all lovely and what you wanted, and another 5 taking payment and having a chat.
I want people out enjoying themselves and spending money, but ltf wont keep you safe from covid..but then in most cases if you don't test you won't even know youve got it.

[quote TheVampiresWife]@AchillesLastStand I've just seen your update.

Last Christmas I started self harming for the first time in decades. I was prescribed antidepressants, again for the first time in decades. I'm not far off the same again now, to be honest. Since last year I've started immunosuppressant drugs for my RA and as a result my life is pretty much nonexistent. Only difference is, this year everyone is able to be out and about and I can't - so it actually feels worse for me. At the same time though I can't bear the thought of others denying themselves doing all the things that make life living to protect me (obviously I can only speak for myself and not all CEV). I'm also painfully aware that my vulnerability is fucking up DH's life, too, because he can't go anywhere either.

I understand why you feel so frustrated a little bit better now. I'm sorry if I seemed a bit harsh in my previous posts to you. I actually get where you're coming from.

[/quote]
It's shit isn't it? I'm 37 and my life is WFH, finish work, cook, watch TV/read, shower, bed. Repeat. Weekends are the same except no work. If I didn't have the cat (live alone) I would have gone stir crazy
I admit every so often I brave the supermarket or TK maxx first thing to just... SEE people and stuff and say something to anyone face to face

Think I'm more used to it now but earlier in the year I cracked and sobbed on the phone to my boss