Support thread for those with family abroad

[Schulte]

Anyone interested in a support thread for those of us who have family abroad, and don't know if we can see them this year? I had started to feel all positive and optimistic about going back to my home country this summer to see my parents, but it's now looking far from certain and I'm feeling increasingly depressed.

I thought maybe we can cheer each other up and share the latest on border openings, how and where to get tests for travel, etc.

Anyone?

"as of as they meet the standards" should read "as long as they meet the standards"

I’m also in Europe, with family and friends I’m desperate to see in the UK, and also in another EU country. Yes, it’s shocking how we can move freely across the continent but getting into the UK is such a nightmare. I’ve managed to see my EU relatives several times throughout the pandemic, but I really feel for those of us who haven’t been able to get to/from the UK in such a long time. It’s becoming unbearable.

I’m hoping we become green by July because otherwise it’s just too expensive to travel to UK. I have attached what the gov.uk current requirements on tests are. Both PCR and antigen tests (LFTs done by a health professional in a testing centre) seem to be accepted. That’s half good news as where I live we have free access to antigen testing, or if you need a travel certificate on top, it’s not more than €20. What becomes financially unviable is having to book all those tests in the UK. If you do days 2, 5 and 8 (to shorten quarantine a bit) you’re looking at £200 pp. Even for one person that’s a lot, never mind a whole family... Plus you’re not even guaranteed results within 24h, I know of people who paid for the day 5 test hoping to shorten quarantine, result came back on day 8. Why even bother.

I’m quite up to date with various EU countries’ travel requirements as I’ve still been travelling regularly due to work, even this winter. I currently have 4 trips planned between end of July and beginning of September so I’m keeping an eye on several countries’ rules and updates. I’d be happy to help answer any questions if I’m able to do so. Let’s hope this nightmare ends ASAP for all of us!

Thank you 🙏 for starting this feeling very low and homesick right now. I have not seen my DPs for over 18months and my worst fear is that they are getting older and precious time is slipping away. I was waiting until later this summer when I will have had both jabs and DPs are already vaccinated. Hopefully by then things will be better but the recent Indian variant news has made me feel pretty despondent.

Thank you for starting this thread. My home country is on the amber list and I'm feeling very low and despondent after over a year of powering through and now can't stop crying. OP is correct, it's not just jetting off for a holiday, it's my child being connected to half of her extended family and her heritage, and my mental health getting repaired by time with my lovely family. I know it must be even tougher for those with family in India right now, you have my love and support.

Trying to navigate this situation is exhausting. We'd like to go to the US to see my family but I've pretty much given up hope of that happening by the end of June (maybe end of September, though it will be cold and rainy there at that time). Its emotionally tiring and I am tired of getting my hopes up for them to only be cut down yet again for whatever THIS week's reason is deemed by government. Partner's family in Sweden is also a no go for the foreseeable.

We have no problem paying for and dealing with the testing and quarantine situation, its the inability to secure travel insurance due to the FCDO declarations. I would maybe risk Sweden without insurance, but the US? no way.

At this point we are ready to throw in the towel entirely on living in the UK - every year seems to have some new problem or hurdle and the returns in terms of quality of life diminishing.

all round and thank you for the advice on tests! I only just saw that re travel insurance. I think in Europe we should at least still be covered by the EHIC card for health emergencies? I’m praying things relax a bit over the next couple of months, for all of us! Also thought the US should be one of the first places to move to the green list?

Thanks again for starting the thread, it's good to talk to people who understand without having to justify or explain my life choices.

It is hard to be away in a crisis, it's doubly hard to feel so powerless in terms of being able to influence the situation,

My country is on the amber list, but it is pretty open internally and my friends have just sent me a picture of them celebrating a joint birthday party at a nice restaurant. I am so happy that they can do it, but I also cried, as I miss them so much. I just want to go home.

As others have said: Thank you for the thread, I need this! All my family are in the US, & we’re in the UK. Haven’t seen each other for 18 months and their only grandchild, my DD, will be 3 this summer. We’ve missed so much and some days the grief is so overwhelming for me. I block it out a lot. I’ve pretty much given up hope of us going there this summer... I was hoping for August but honestly no idea now.

But amazingly my DF who is dual citizen is booked to come here at beginning of June. I’ve spent all day doing the admin for him and the cost of all the tests and the test and release day 5 is already over £200. But oh my god I’m just praying it all works and he can make it over here. I miss my mom and siblings so so much too.

Hello! I’m the one abroad (in Connecticut, USA). It’s beyond frustrating, as the US is now in a good spot, and my state has done a superb job since the initial surge. In my town of 25k people, 65 percent are fully vaccinated.

My parents are supposed to visit in August. I check the news daily for travel updates, hoping for the best, and am starting to think meeting in a neutral country at that time might be the more realistic option.

I’m sorry to everyone in the same boat. I go apoplectic every time I hear foreign travel framed only as a piss-up in the sun.

I'm in Oz, and the border is going to be shut for at least another year. Much as I miss my mum and family and friends, I agree with the border closure, as life here is normal apart from no overseas travel. I do worry about my brother in law back in the UK though, he is very ill and it will be just awful if we can't see him again. I also worry about flight prices once we re-open, as there will be so much demand to travel and flights were expensive even before all of this. So I try not to think about it too much, as there is nothing I can do about the situation.

Hi, I’m in a red list country but have been fully vaccinated since March (like over 70% of people here). I have elderly parents and an adult child in the U.K. who I’ve not seen for 18 months. I’m so homesick now, but I think if DH and I were cooped up in a hotel bedroom for 10 days, both of us trying to work, only one if us would leave the room alive. Looking at coming home via Greece but we pile them need to quarantine at home (scotland) so would only have 2 days to see my parents before we’d need to come back. It’s stressing me out so much, and or to everyone on the same situation, wherever you are.

Had hoped to be coming home at Christmas- in Australia and wanted to travel to the UK. Looks like Australia won't open until mid next year. Pretty gutted and concerned with elderly parents. Wish moving home was an option!

I'm another one stuck in Fortress Australia (as the media here are calling it).
It's a difficult situation as with borders closed and very little covid here, there's not the incentive for people to be immunised; but we can't open the borders until we have some level of herd immunity. It's a chicken and egg situation.
And in the meantime, I haven't seen my family (including my son) for a year and a half now.

I'm from an amber EU country with pretty good vaccination rates.
I've bought our tickets for when school is out and really hope it will go green by then. Really crapping myself if it's still amber, what if they turn us away at the airport (in the UK)?

Haven't seen my family since Aug.
I won't be fully vaccinated by then sadly but I'm trying to arrange my second dose abroad.
I'm beyong frustrated with this whole thing

We are the family abroad. Ds was Born May 2020 so family have never met grandchild yet.
Also Europe, so now we have freedom to travel all over Europe pretty easily, but still have a huge faff if we try and get back to Uk.

Dh father is very sick, we may have to face the long quarantines soon to visit as I’m not sure we have time to wait until September now when I was hoping restrictions would have lifted a bit and more time for vaccinations.

My whole family in the US. If the US haven't removed the travel ban by the start of July, I am going to bite the bullet and spend 2 weeks in Mexico as a third country.

The whole system is ridiculous - having to travel and stay inactive country with a far worse covid situation to be able to enter the US.

It is possible to get valid travel insurance for the US, it is just very very expensive. A cost I am willing to pay to see my family.

Yep family in Aus

Feels very closed atm!

I’m in the Uk, but my family are in Australia. No idea when we will ever see them again. My elderly parents have all but given up hope of ever seeing my sister again.

Really empathise with you all. My mum, brother and sister are in Australia. We haven't seen them since 2019 and looks like it will at least 2022 before we are reunited 😢 I hate the fact that my children are missing out on a relationship with them and that my mum is missing seeing them grow. We were all supposed to spending the summer together to celebrate my mum's 60th but there is no way that is happening now 😢

Hi my Dad is in Italy and I haven’t seen him since the summer of 2019. He is 82 and worried he won’t see my sister and I and my dc again.

I am hoping Italy is green this summer and if not hoping we can do the testing and quarantining.

He has definitely become more frail and changed and without in person contact it’s very hard.

All close adult family in NZ and there's talk of no opening of NZ until 2022 or even 2023.

A small but vocal minority back home have expressed resentment towards those of us abroad, and whilst the "Team of 5 million" was great motivational slogan for those living Kiwi-side, it effectively let the rest of us know we're off the team.

The truth is, that team has 6 million - including the 1 million of is who live abroad and are doing our pandemic duty by staying away.

Hopefully we'll be welcomed back with open arms when it's all over. I miss my family so much and they miss us, sometimes l've felt so nauseatingly homesick, not being able to visit, but I just stuff it right back down and keep going. What else is there to do?

It all makes me so sad, but c'est la vie.

to all others in the same boat.

Am sorry to see so many of us in the same boat but glad we can all vent here. I have a 20 yr old DD in uni in India; please do not ask why she is there ! It seemed like a good idea pre-pandemic. Her uni was actually on the point of going back when the second wave hit.

Miss her terribly and am very worried about her mental health, but for those of us in red countries, we should probably resign ourselves to a long haul. I have hopes of seeing my sister in the US at some point as all of have been vaccinated.

I decided yesterday that I was going to stop obsessing over the Coronavirus boards and picking fights with people. Does no good at all and I was clearly spiralling.

So I:
Volunteered for a Covid charity in India. Felt good to do something useful even if a drop in the ocean.

Went to a museum and looked at some beautiful things. Set up another visit on Sunday with DH so we can get our minds off family.

Spent the evening watching Midsomer Murders, gentle escapist fare.

Going to try to continue all this. My second shot is next week and that gives me some hope.

I think one of the worst things is not knowing when and if you’ll be reunited. I really feel for everyone with poorly or elderly parents/siblings/children abroad who may not have much time left. It’s an unbearable situation to be in.

When it was in the news that Jürgen Klopp couldn’t go to his mum‘s funeral, I just broke down in tears, because I realised there are probably hundreds in the same boat.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.skysports.com/amp/football/news/11669/12214247/jurgen-klopp-unable-to-attend-his-mothers-funeral-in-germany-due-to-covid-19-travel-restrictions

Thing is, I want to see my parents again while they are still alive.

I don’t want to be kept away from my own country. I absolutely understand the need to stop the virus spreading but for people like us, governments should find a way of facilitating rather than blocking travel.

When I told a friend here how upset I was about the borders being closed, she said (very unsympathetically) ‘well, I haven’t seen my parents since 2019 either’. Thing is, she could easily hop in the car at any time and drive the 60 miles to her parents’ house.

We can’t, and that makes all the difference.

One of our coping strategies has been to order the DD’s favourite German food and chocolate online, some of it at extortionate prices.

Watching YouTube videos of people walking around my home town, the zoo (we always go to the zoo when we’re there) and other favourite places.

Zoom dinners with my parents.

It worked ok for a year but we’re now so worn out, we need the real thing.

Apparently more countries are now being considered for the green list, hope it helps some of us!

‘ At a meeting of the 1922 Conservative backbench committee last night, the prime minister said the likes of Malta, Grenada, Cayman Islands, Fiji, British Virgin Islands, Finland and various Caribbean islands, including Antigua and Barbuda, are in contention to turn green come 7 June, according to reports in The Telegraph.’