Are you still sticking to ALL of the rules?

[CallTheSheriff]

Our family has followed all rules to date but with two weeks left until social contact restrictions are lifted I see more and more people using a ‘common sense’ approach for their own risk.

My DC go to school (primary), attend swimming lessons, attend dance classes and indoor football classes but we decline the offer of play dates with other DC in their class.

DH and I have not mixed indoors with any other adult since last March. We both WFH and are both partially vaccinated. We do not attend gyms etc as we didn’t pre covid anyway.

Our friends and family think we are being OTT, especially in not allowing DC to visit others after school but allowing them to attend classes.

It made me wonder how others are doing it?

@SinkGirl

Not all NHS staff are following the rules themselves. I have 2 family members and one friend who are NHS and they have all broken the rules at some point. One is frontline!

"At one point we were 30% of clinical staff and 90% of administrative staff down."

That's a long long time ago now (pandemic lifespan wise) and it isn't the case anywhere in the uk anymore, nor will it be since we now have vaccines.

You can roll your eyes all you like but honestly, those "things called meetings" aren't representative of what is actually happening. You haven't seen it with your own eyes and your experience working remotely isn't the same.

Once the zoom is ended people go back to their natural state, once their shift is over they go back to their natural state. You're seeing a false reality and you obviously believe that your front line colleagues are sticking to the rules.

They really aren't anymore.

You're being left behind in your remote working, socially distanced bubble

"I really hope none of the people responding here that they’re ignoring the rules are those contacting the NHS to complain about restrictions and waiting lists."

Why? Surely you know that's not how the NHS works. Or are you also informed at your "things called meetings" that the whole ethos of the NHS has changed and they only treat non rule breakers?

I do have a friend who has stuck rigidly to the ‘rules’ . She hasn’t seen her son in the same city for well over a year. Literally the only person she has seen has been her elderly mother who has also been in complete isolation in her flat for over a year. She is falling apart mentally and now frightened to go out at all apart from to drive to her mother’s. She hasn’t been in a shop at all since lockdown and has taken redundancy because she’s too frightened to go back to work in retail now. This is where rigidly following rules gets you.

Have had 4 other family members inside for dinner this weekend.

All went away as a family of 11 at Xmas.

DD had 4 mates around last week for her birthday.

Party of 4 inside for my sis in laws 40th in March.

Apart from that, yes.

"I do have a friend who has stuck rigidly to the ‘rules’ . She hasn’t seen her son in the same city for well over a year."

Sounds like she's made her own rules up to be honest. The rules have allowed her to see her son in the past year.

@Bluesheep8

*Yes. We are following the rules.

I think it’s really sad that people are so gleeful about breaking them and not ashamed at all. We’ve all found the last year unbelievably hard but the rules are what have saved thousands if not millions of deaths. Good people comply with the law. If you don’t like the law/rules then don’t vote conservative!*

I've followed the rules to the letter since the start and shall continue to do so until they change. I fail to see how following the rules set out by the government has anything to do with whether I voted for them or not.

There's nothing gleeful about it.

Most people not following the rules will have their reasons. It's not sustainable to expect everyone to live in this kind of isolation for this long.

@sunsetsand

"I do have a friend who has stuck rigidly to the ‘rules’ . She hasn’t seen her son in the same city for well over a year."

Sounds like she's made her own rules up to be honest. The rules have allowed her to see her son in the past year.

Not unless she’s in a bubble with them. She’s bubbled with her mother. Both she and her son are frightened to go outside. Neither of them had a garden.

No. I’ve been to my mum and dad’s house a few times over the last fortnight. They’ve both had both doses of the vaccination and we’re doing regular LFTs because of work/childcare. DD has had a couple of indoor playdates. The weather has been utter shit here for about a week and looks like it’ll continue, I don’t see the point in restricting us to shit weekends when it can be greatly improved by seeing a small number of friends or family members indoors at an absolutely minuscule risk.

Why? Surely you know that's not how the NHS works. Or are you also informed at your "things called meetings" that the whole ethos of the NHS has changed and they only treat non rule breakers?

Is your comprehension usually this poor?

I didn’t say that we shouldn’t treat rule breakers. I’m saying I’ve been alarmed by how many people don’t see the link between breaking the rules and the NHS being on its arse.

@mermaidsariel

I do have a friend who has stuck rigidly to the ‘rules’ . She hasn’t seen her son in the same city for well over a year. Literally the only person she has seen has been her elderly mother who has also been in complete isolation in her flat for over a year. She is falling apart mentally and now frightened to go out at all apart from to drive to her mother’s. She hasn’t been in a shop at all since lockdown and has taken redundancy because she’s too frightened to go back to work in retail now. This is where rigidly following rules gets you.

@mermaidsariel This is where rigidly following rules gets you. It sounds really hard for your friend, her son and her mother....but this is not because of following the rules, which have allowed for all sorts of mitigating circumstances. I hope she is able to get some support with her mental health moving forward.

@1122bucklemyshoe

*There's nothing gleeful about it.

Most people not following the rules will have their reasons. It's not sustainable to expect everyone to live in this kind of isolation for this long.*

I didn't say there was, I was quoting someone else's post.

"Not unless she’s in a bubble with them. She’s bubbled with her mother. Both she and her son are frightened to go outside. Neither of them had a garden."

No, the rules have explicitly stated she could meet him for a walk or a meal or a picnic regardless of bubbles. Being afraid to go outside is a separate issue.

"Is your comprehension usually this poor?

I didn’t say that we shouldn’t treat rule breakers. I’m saying I’ve been alarmed by how many people don’t see the link between breaking the rules and the NHS being on its arse."

No you're not, you're saying you hope they aren't expecting adequate treatment if they've broken the rules. It's all there in your post.

And if you think the NHS is on its arse thanks to rule breakers then you're hugely mistaken and obviously not as in touch with major issues within the NHS and the funding of it than you think you are.

@SinkGirl

Why? Surely you know that's not how the NHS works. Or are you also informed at your "things called meetings" that the whole ethos of the NHS has changed and they only treat non rule breakers?

Is your comprehension usually this poor?

I didn’t say that we shouldn’t treat rule breakers. I’m saying I’ve been alarmed by how many people don’t see the link between breaking the rules and the NHS being on its arse.

Most of the people I know, or know of, who've had Covid have caught it at work or in hospital.The NHS is on its arse because of a brand-new virus to which no-one had immunity last year, combined with years of underfunding and inadequate staffing. I really dislike the assumption that people who've caught Covid must have been breaking the rules.

"I really dislike the assumption that people who've caught Covid must have been breaking the rules."

Indeed. Especially when that assumption is being made by the very person they apparently need to contact when they suffer long covid.

We stick to the majority of the rules but do have all 3 sets of grandparents indoors now. We wouldn't be able to see them otherwise as they are not as tolerant to sitting in the cold, they are also vaccinated and as far as I'm concerned it's their choice to take that risk.
We lost my step mum this year - I hadn't seen her for 6 months and didn't get a chance to say goodbye. It brought home how important each year is once people get to that age and there isn't necessarily time to wait for a future year to see them.

@RaspberryCoulis
*Nope, have regularly broken the rules since before Christmas. In particular the ridiculous Scottish "do not leave your local authority area one".

We've had people in the house, I've seen my mum inside and hugged her, I had an illegal haircut, the kids don't like doing the lateral flow tests so I don't make them.

Complying with the masks in shops but that's more to avoid the covid militia prowling the aisles making loud passive aggressive remarks about people who think they're oh so special."*

I think you are the one that thinks you are "oh so special"

All of us "breaking rules" are actually just leading their normal every day lives and probably mainly seeing the same people indoors. No one is saying theyre having raves, orgies or a revolving door of different people on their houses.
Alot of families are entwined with others from another household especially where children are involved. 1st lockdown initially we were all at home and could stay isolated however now me and DH are both back at work we need the help of others (our parents) to help with childcare. Both parents have other commitments so couldn't choose just one set and sometimes the dc need to be minded here so GP are coming into my home anyway. If you have been lucky enough to WFH and not need help or support from others or needed to support others yourself then you are fortunate, in reality it's just not feasible for some not to mix indoors with others for varying reasons and be all high and mighty and smug about it over others.

I don't have any friends/family (other than DD.and DH and I live with them!) but if I did, and we were all vaccinated, I'd definitely be seeing them at this point.

I've made a few not strictly necessary bus journeys in the past few weeks and it's been wonderful to finally get out and about.

@Wellbythebloodyhell

All of us "breaking rules" are actually just leading their normal every day lives and probably mainly seeing the same people indoors. No one is saying theyre having raves, orgies or a revolving door of different people on their houses. Alot of families are entwined with others from another household especially where children are involved. 1st lockdown initially we were all at home and could stay isolated however now me and DH are both back at work we need the help of others (our parents) to help with childcare. Both parents have other commitments so couldn't choose just one set and sometimes the dc need to be minded here so GP are coming into my home anyway. If you have been lucky enough to WFH and not need help or support from others or needed to support others yourself then you are fortunate, in reality it's just not feasible for some not to mix indoors with others for varying reasons and be all high and mighty and smug about it over others.

Yes, pretty much. We've allowed ds's girlfriend into our house and vice versa for months. The benefit to both of their mental health outweighed any other risk. He's also been to an overnight party. There were 6 of them, the same 6 are in the same college bubble. They share a music studio every day in the week so I hardly think that a weekend get together was any more risk.

@Ticklemycarpets

We stick to the majority of the rules but do have all 3 sets of grandparents indoors now. We wouldn't be able to see them otherwise as they are not as tolerant to sitting in the cold, they are also vaccinated and as far as I'm concerned it's their choice to take that risk. We lost my step mum this year - I hadn't seen her for 6 months and didn't get a chance to say goodbye. It brought home how important each year is once people get to that age and there isn't necessarily time to wait for a future year to see them.

I think you make a very relevant point.

Over the last year I have seen way too many posters smugly admonishing people about breaking their interpretation (often fictional) of the rules. They often say that there is always tomorrow, next week, next year etc. etc.

No! For those of us who have lost relatives, often elderly but not always, sometimes the painful reality is simply that there are no more tomorrows left and time has run out.

As for the other poster (not you) who called us gleeful, just listen to yourself! People can have many reasons for doing what they do. I had to do some rule bending (some of it not within guidance) when my Dad became terminally ill and died. Gleeful!! Really!! Do bugger off!!

Exactly. We were close to losing father in law in the summer. And mentally, both he, dh, dd and ds are on some kind of AD or anxiety medication (ds is officially for migraine but it has a dual purpose).

Pisses me off when people want a blue Peter badge for not going into a shop or have been able to WFH or haven't seen another living soul for over a year! Fucking good for you some of us don't have lives that enable us to do those things, some people really are so far removed from reality its scary

@Wellbythebloodyhell was that directed at my OP?

If so, I absolutely understand life is not so plain sailing and I don’t judge anyone for making their own minds up at this point. I wish I was brave enough to do it myself, but I care too much what others think