How much longer are we meant to do this?

[Creamteaincornwall]

I have so many friends who are at the end of their tether. Some suicidal, many almost.
I attend a zoom support group for my mental health and emotional well being as I have BPD and ASD. The last few weeks have been horrendous, every person is at the lowest they’ve been since the beginning of all this.
The amount of posts I’ve read on various Facebook groups of people saying they don’t want to get up in the morning anymore, they just stay in bed. Surely this isn’t doing anyone any good physically or mentally?
Surely this will put most in a weaker position if they were to catch covid?

How much more are we all suppose to take of this? With no end in sight?

Calledyoulastnightfromglasgow. We are not quite there yet, the numbers in hospital is very large, that needs to come down

@Heyahun

oh ffs - until things improve and it's safe to do so!

You can go and see who ever you want - break the rules if you want - but if everyone does that then it will just go on longer!

I'm actually so fed up hearing people demanding an end date - there isn't one - we can't predict the future

Life HAS to come back though. The UK population isn't living and in many cases isn't earning. It's not OK and we need a plan.

I agree op. This cannot go on indefinitely. Plenty of countries did not lockdown and their deaths are better. In the US states that stayed open have less deaths than those that implemented strict lockdowns. Lockdowns will undoubtably kill more than they tried to save. Plenty of scientists, doctors and professors speaking about out about this.

Do you not think the 65 to 70 groups are not vulnerable then you have people with underlying health conditions ? My daughter is 33 but with type 1diabetes this make her vulnerable I had seen good old fashion pneumonia land her in intensive care twice

I am sorry your dd has been so sick, but surely she has now been vaccinated given her health problems, we can't judge every young person just because a few have diabetes. It is not reasonable to hold the whole of society to ransom just because there might be one person that gets long covid etc.

I believe those at most risk will be vaccinated by the end of the week, anyone else that feels that they are at risk can continue to shield, but the rest of the country now needs to get on with the important and essential job of rebuilding our economy and our children's lives.

Johnson is the type of person who only wants to tell people what they want to hear and to be the good guy delivering good news. He's the Disney Dad.
Yep. And mark my words, he's going to resign just before the legacy of his lockdown (mass unemployment, mental health at rock bottom, many suicides) starts to be felt. He and his merry men are keeping extremely quiet about this at the moment, distracting us with "Look! A variant!" on a bad day, or "Look! A vaccine!" on a good day.

It's difficult because although mental health groups can be really helpful for some people, they also can be mood-infecting for others. There's lots of research now on how we catch moods from people around us, and if we have positive, optimistic, stoic people around us (not Toxic Positivity, but accepting of where we are and trying to make the best of it) we cope much better day to day in difficult situations, rather than when we spend a large portion of any contact time talking about how bad we feel, how difficult things are, how much we're struggling, how it's too much.

As I say, sometimes we have to express those things out loud to feel their weight lessen, and it can be really freeing - other times it just digs us deeper into those moods and it ends up seeming like we'll never stop feeling that way. And of course social media makes us feel like we're 'connecting' with others, but in fact we're just feeding into the panic, disinformation, and negativity.

I hope everyone who's struggling feels better soon x

@SavannahMiasMum To be fair, most governments have enacted similar restrictions and spunked similar amounts of taxpayer money up the wall. Maybe not quite as much money, or to quite as many of their mates to deliver FA. I don't even really blame the government that much, if anything I'm grateful they're not as seemingly nuts as Macron, who seems happy to stoke vaccine hesistancy.
But the money will run out, because jobs are going, and therefore so is tax revenue. That's basically why they're ploughing absolutely all their efforts into vaccination. I think they will just change their tune once all the jabs are in arms, and say that it's all quite manageable - even if the numbers don't look that great. I just want them to get rid of Priti Patel in the meantime, she is a psycho.

Oh yes there is
There's lots
And it will be done

For example?

Do you know how ridiculous you sound?

elli Do you not see you are being completely and utterly unreasonable to suggest that because you choose to be obese, therefore tens of millions have to remain locked down even though they are healthy and at no risk? They have to forgo their livelihoods, freedoms, kids well being just to protect you from long covid?! You can't be for real surely!!

@speaksofty

Do you not think the 65 to 70 groups are not vulnerable then you have people with underlying health conditions ? My daughter is 33 but with type 1diabetes this make her vulnerable I had seen good old fashion pneumonia land her in intensive care twice

I am sorry your dd has been so sick, but surely she has now been vaccinated given her health problems, we can't judge every young person just because a few have diabetes. It is not reasonable to hold the whole of society to ransom just because there might be one person that gets long covid etc.

I believe those at most risk will be vaccinated by the end of the week, anyone else that feels that they are at risk can continue to shield, but the rest of the country now needs to get on with the important and essential job of rebuilding our economy and our children's lives.

No she has not been vaccinated she is in group 6 You really think just a few have diabetes quite apart from all the others in this group

I think you should all stop feeding the elli trolling.

@Monkeyrock

It's difficult because although mental health groups can be really helpful for some people, they also can be mood-infecting for others. There's lots of research now on how we catch moods from people around us, and if we have positive, optimistic, stoic people around us (not Toxic Positivity, but accepting of where we are and trying to make the best of it) we cope much better day to day in difficult situations, rather than when we spend a large portion of any contact time talking about how bad we feel, how difficult things are, how much we're struggling, how it's too much.

As I say, sometimes we have to express those things out loud to feel their weight lessen, and it can be really freeing - other times it just digs us deeper into those moods and it ends up seeming like we'll never stop feeling that way. And of course social media makes us feel like we're 'connecting' with others, but in fact we're just feeding into the panic, disinformation, and negativity.

I hope everyone who's struggling feels better soon x

I agree with every word of this, and I do so as someone who has successfully come through PTSD and severe clinical depression some years ago.

Pity parties really bring me down. There's a fine balance between offloading and spiralling. The line is different for everyone, but I have to be very careful about how much time I spend in the wallow, and how much time I focus on getting on about things. To do lists, 25 minute bursts of activity & daily exercise all help (I say this having procrastinated all morning about a big work task I'm dreading, but I now will get offline & focus).

Look after yourselves, folks. Try to find the light where you are... better days are on the way x

[quote Baileysforchristmas]@ElliFAntspoo are you this happy in real life? Do you have any friends? You would make the most positive person want to curl up and die.[/quote]
This.....!! Do you enjoy bringing others down? If you don't have something positive to say then say nothing at all.
Take a breath and buckle down for just another month. Things will start to look very different then. More vaccinations done , spring is coming...get out and walk, inhale the air free of traffic pollution. Life's a bitch atm but we just have to get on with it for the sake of our futures. We will have to just take care in our social interactions for a year or two.
This country is in a better position than many. Leave it at that.

He and his merry men are keeping extremely quiet about this at the moment

I am assuming they are working out solutions, it is not as if the to list is running low. I don't know how any leader of any country even sleeps at night with so much responsibility and stress. So no, I am not into making this political. I hardly think Starmer would do a better job given he can't even work out the difference between a medicine agency and a vaccine agency. Every country is battling this virus, and I would worry more about the countries that have given up and are letting it rip, at least we are trying our best to keep every single person alive.

If your dd is in group six then clearly medically speaking she is not very high risk is she? I mean this kindly, but any younger person can choose to shield, and continue to do until they are vaccinated, but that does not mean we should all be locked up until every last person with every last underlying issue is vaccinated. That is selfish and insane.

@speaksofty

If your dd is in group six then clearly medically speaking she is not very high risk is she? I mean this kindly, but any younger person can choose to shield, and continue to do until they are vaccinated, but that does not mean we should all be locked up until every last person with every last underlying issue is vaccinated. That is selfish and insane.

Obviously you know little about diabetes she keeps away from people as much as possible but her DH still has to go out to work she is working from home as her company know how dangerous it could be for her if she got it Group 6 should have had their first vaccination by the end of March to April so not that long for you to wait to have your friends round Fortunately it’s not up to you when the economy is allowed to open up again but I suspect not much will happen until mid April

Spring is on the way, and I think that is half the trouble tbh.

How would you normally feel at this time of year? It's February, we've just got past solstice, the days are beginning to get longer but it's still only just noticeable. People normally start to get fed up to the back teeth around now anyway.

Hang in there. Snowdrops are up, and daffodils are sprouting.

I don't know, we've had 3 family deaths so far & to be honest its becoming more scary. Im lucky I still work front facing so get to see many people. I am looking forward to this virus retracting and having a more normal life again

For the sake of my own sanity and that of my kids, I am focusing on:

1. Spring. I really do think the constant rain/mud/sleet in my part of the UK is making an already shit situation seem even worse - sounds pathetic, but this weather is making me want to sob. I want to see sunshine and daffodils like never before and get through a day without being rained on. It's coming!

1. I have to tell myself that the end is in sight. They are jabbing at a good rate now. Yes there are unanswered questions over mutations, but the news today mentioned one of the jabs being less effective re mild illness in a mutated strain, but still very effective at preventing serious illness.

I am just holding on by the skin of my teeth.

What shocks me is how strict the lockdown has been for so long in the UK and how disinterested in comparing lockdown with other conditions most people are.

The internal travel ban - fining people for driving to beauty spots and national parks to walk while maintaining social distancing is unnecessarily draconian. The abuse of people who travel to their holiday homes or drive somewhere else is disgusting.

I tried to go on on a short break in Scotland at the tail end of the summer. I was late in arranging it because it only became apparent late on that my actual booked foreign holiday would not be possible. Everything reasonable was fully booked or closed - I'm not paying £120 per night for sole use of a small hut with no toilet - so I decided to camp. It was grim. It was really difficult to find public toilets that were open or cafes/restaurants. That was fair enough, but on the third night I paid to stay at a campsite that had no electricity! I wanted to boil water for heating pasta and to make a hot water bottle, and it was impossible. I asked the campsite owner and he just said no. He wouldn't go and boil my kettle in his office for me. So I just left, and drove 6 hours home through the night.

What is wrong with this country? I holidayed in Switzerland in July and everything was open, families were relaxing at lakesides, people were hiking and eating in restaurants, the only rule was masks on public transport.

Why have we been so ridiculously restricted in this country for so long? We were more restricted all summer, we went into lockdown in November for a month before any other European country did, which was meant to be a circuit breaker, then we couldn't have Christmas and straight away back into lockdown again, for months on end with no debate about ever coming out of it.

Does anyone know if there is a standard measurement of covid deaths internationally? Does every country count as a covid death anyone dying within 28 days of a positive test?

@GreenlandTheMovie

What shocks me is how strict the lockdown has been for so long in the UK and how disinterested in comparing lockdown with other conditions most people are.

The internal travel ban - fining people for driving to beauty spots and national parks to walk while maintaining social distancing is unnecessarily draconian. The abuse of people who travel to their holiday homes or drive somewhere else is disgusting.

I tried to go on on a short break in Scotland at the tail end of the summer. I was late in arranging it because it only became apparent late on that my actual booked foreign holiday would not be possible. Everything reasonable was fully booked or closed - I'm not paying £120 per night for sole use of a small hut with no toilet - so I decided to camp. It was grim. It was really difficult to find public toilets that were open or cafes/restaurants. That was fair enough, but on the third night I paid to stay at a campsite that had no electricity! I wanted to boil water for heating pasta and to make a hot water bottle, and it was impossible. I asked the campsite owner and he just said no. He wouldn't go and boil my kettle in his office for me. So I just left, and drove 6 hours home through the night.

What is wrong with this country? I holidayed in Switzerland in July and everything was open, families were relaxing at lakesides, people were hiking and eating in restaurants, the only rule was masks on public transport.

Why have we been so ridiculously restricted in this country for so long? We were more restricted all summer, we went into lockdown in November for a month before any other European country did, which was meant to be a circuit breaker, then we couldn't have Christmas and straight away back into lockdown again, for months on end with no debate about ever coming out of it.

Does anyone know if there is a standard measurement of covid deaths internationally? Does every country count as a covid death anyone dying within 28 days of a positive test?

He wouldn't take your kettle and boil it for you so you could keep warm on a campsite you were paying him to use?! Sounds like a right git, and was probably a git pre-pandemic too.

@speaksofty

elli Do you not see you are being completely and utterly unreasonable to suggest that because you choose to be obese, therefore tens of millions have to remain locked down even though they are healthy and at no risk? They have to forgo their livelihoods, freedoms, kids well being just to protect you from long covid?! You can't be for real surely!!

No. That is the exact opposite of what I said.

There is a thread on obesity and Covid where I have been very clear about my position on obesity and the way Britain should not pander to fat people. Tax the F out of processed sugars like they were cigarettes and alcohol. That will curb fat people consuming sugar.

If I am offered a jab, I will take it. As far as I know there isn't a fatty section in the priority list, I haven't looked, because I don't expect they'll meet their deadlines before the end of the year anyways, and by then the two new strains from outer Mongolia and Timbuktu will be emerging and they won't know how to deal with those or the efficacy of their vaccines, so they'll need to keep everyone in lockdown as a precaution anyway.

But no where do I say that I believe that obese people should be protected from the impact of their choices. I think I have been more than clear on that in many threads. You roll the dice and take your chance. If you can't be bothered losing weight and you are wrong about your odds of survival, you die and you abandon your kids.

Believe me, I have a very realistic view of this.

This is not going away for years. You can look for comfort blankets and platitudes from the government, but like a child, do not complain when you learn that the comfort blankets and the platitudes were just that, because we are adults and should be robust enough to see things for what they are. The comforters are there for those who need them.

I think you should try and get yourself out of the echo chamber of misery you seem to have found yourself in. It would drain anyone. I'm not sure how you have found yourself surrounded by so many people suffering from severe mental health problems but try joining some light-hearted groups like gardening or knitting or whatever floats your boat.

Most people are a bit fed up for sure but staying in bed all day and suicide ideation are at the extreme end and not representative of what the vast majority of people are feeling at the moment. Of course, you can encourage these people to get the help that they clearly need but then step back and save yourself.

Yes to the goalpost constantly moving, we are going from protecting the nhs to worrying about new variants, people keep saying we are nearly there but we are constantly being told otherwise. People are crying out internally and externally and it is just being ignored by the government who are hellbent on restrictions galore until what? Until people have lost the will to live?

[quote Baileysforchristmas]@ElliFAntspoo are you this happy in real life? Do you have any friends? You would make the most positive person want to curl up and die.[/quote]
Times like this I wish MN had an Ignore button, for all the 'realistic' posters revelling in trying to make everyone else as miserable as they clearly are.