How much longer are we meant to do this?

[Creamteaincornwall]

I have so many friends who are at the end of their tether. Some suicidal, many almost.
I attend a zoom support group for my mental health and emotional well being as I have BPD and ASD. The last few weeks have been horrendous, every person is at the lowest they’ve been since the beginning of all this.
The amount of posts I’ve read on various Facebook groups of people saying they don’t want to get up in the morning anymore, they just stay in bed. Surely this isn’t doing anyone any good physically or mentally?
Surely this will put most in a weaker position if they were to catch covid?

How much more are we all suppose to take of this? With no end in sight?

Afternoon, everyone,

We can see that there are a few people on this thread who are finding this all pretty difficult at the moment. Just in case it's helpful, here are a few links to information and support that might help:

NHS: Where to get urgent help for mental health

NHS: Help for suicidal thoughts

NHS: Looking after your mental health

MIND: Coping with mental health problems during coronavirus

Gov.UK: Find out what support you can get if you’re affected by coronavirus

CALM: The Campaign Against Living Miserably

elli

You are saying on one hand we must stay locked down due to long covid (your own experience) and all the other reasons you have listed on this thread.

And then on the other hand you are agreeing it is your choice to be overweight due to lifestyle choices, so assuming you will protect yourself with better lifestyle choices if you choose to. So surely by extension you must agree that now the CLINICALLY vulnerable are vaccinated it is a good time ease restrictions? Surely you must agree?

Yes this may go on for years and years, but for now we are coming out of the third wave, the vaccination programme is still offering some protection to those at most risk - it is time to burst into the spring and enjoy life for a while no?

I have no idea what you are talking about comforters etc, I think you will find most of average intelligence know the score.

@ElliFAntspoo

We can't keep stopping children from accessing schools for 1/3 of the year at a time. Why? There was a time when they said, we can't keep kids in classrooms all day. And the kids were forced into classrooms and learnt to deal with it. Now we think its normal just because that's the way we were brought up. As with all educational experiences, the successful succeed and the failures fail. It is the same with the current system.

Why?

Are you being serious?

@Radio4Rocks

Oh yes there is There's lots And it will be done

For example?

Do you know how ridiculous you sound?

Civik disobedience on minor scale, eg visiting our friends and family in their homes Through votes at election box Civil disobedience on larger scale We must fight back Oh look, a vaccine. Oh er new variant vaccine doesn't work restrictions must stay I dont think so

Times like this I wish MN had an Ignore button, for all the 'realistic' posters revelling in trying to make everyone else as miserable as they clearly are.

She’s just used good old “believe me” as well, as if this adds legitimacy to her nonsense.

Best ignored I feel, I shall now be doing the same.

Having lost multiple family members to covid I think we need to comply as long as possible. Yea it is difficult. Yes I want my children at school, yes I want some normality and some kind of social life but the pain of losing family members is not comparable.

@KriekAndWaffle

Times like this I wish MN had an Ignore button, for all the 'realistic' posters revelling in trying to make everyone else as miserable as they clearly are.

She’s just used good old “believe me” as well, as if this adds legitimacy to her nonsense.

Best ignored I feel, I shall now be doing the same.

Yes, like all the posters who add the words 'sorry' or 'I'm afraid' in an attempt to give their doom laden guesses - and they are just guesses - some weight.

How much do you want to bet that 4 months ago this person was saying 'We'll never have a vaccine, I'm afraid''?

@ElliFAntspoo are you this happy in real life? Do you have any friends? You would make the most positive person want to curl up and die.

We are supremely happy with our life, but like everyone there are things I wish were different. We rent privately, so we have uncertainty in whether or not someone else's personal circumstances could make us homeless. We were furloughed for a huge chink of last year, so we have concerns that we could end up with zero income. We have children and have concerns about their lack of socialisation etc. But I am a realist by nature, I see the world around me and take it for what it is, not what I wish it would be. I have no fear of the future for my family, their education, or their ability to cope in whatever future presents itself.

This.....!! Do you enjoy bringing others down? If you don't have something positive to say then say nothing at all.
If you choose to read negativity into the way one person sees the future playing out compared to another, that is entirely a matter for you, and more a reflection of your world view than mine. I can honestly say that I have never been more positive of the future or more clear about the options ahead of me than at any time in the past decade. If you need a world painted rosy and fluffy, maybe reading a thread where someone asks if this will ever end, is not the place to find your brand of positivity. I do not believe is sugar coating BS. I say it as I see it. If it provokes the question, 'what if I lose my job', 'what if there is no electricity for a week?', 'what if my partner dies?', 'what if people start getting mugged in my neighbourhood?', and a light goes on and someone makes a change in their life or thinks their way around a problem without it actually happening, that's a bonus.

When DD came to me to tell me why she had a nightmare, and why did she have nightmares when they weren't real, I told her it was a way of finding out how to do scary things without having to do them for real. So if scary things do happen for real maybe she's already practiced and it wouldn't be so scary. Maybe that's wrong, maybe that makes me a bad parent, I don't know. But if we don't confront scary things when we can see them coming down the road ahead of us, that just makes for a really shitty stressful life IMO, and I don't need that crap. I have a job to do and a family to raise.

Realist my arse.

@Beaniecats

Fight back against who?

There is no appetite for civil disobedience in the face of so many deaths.

It needs to end. They've already said primary schools could of gone back weeks ago.
It's really not fair. I understand why they're doing it, but to against science and numbers isn't on.
I'm very depressed I haven't seen my family in over a year because of this crap.. and it turns out it's not even a pandemic as not many people are dying it's just all down the government not funding the NHS enough so they could cope with this sort of thing.

@Totallycluelessoverhere

Having lost multiple family members to covid I think we need to comply as long as possible. Yea it is difficult. Yes I want my children at school, yes I want some normality and some kind of social life but the pain of losing family members is not comparable.

I think a lot of the posters who want to go out socialising don't realise how dangerous this is, haven't had it reach out and touch their lives yet, and believe they are invincible.

More and more of the Invincible are finding out that viruses learn and adapt far faster than human beings do. Sadly some of them die and their partners get to go one TV to talk about them.

actually another thing that makes me so angry is that we're all suffering with lockdown after lockdowns and they still haven't shut the borders to stop people bringing in more variants and infections! They haven't even sorted the hotels yet we're all still being punished.

So you agree we should ease restrictions then elli being the realist that you are? No doubt you will know that the mother of all recessions is on its way as we try and pay back the trillions of debt that has been piling up for the past year. So you accept that in order for the country not to sink financially the quicker we reopen the better? The realist in you will also recognise that furlough money does not grow on trees and hills.

What gets me through:

I never think about the activities I can't do, and I have made a vision board of all the activities I can do/will be able to do shortly. Some of these activities include:

• A list of the national trust sites I plan to visit
• A day time to the beach
• The recipes I want to try (99% cake)
• The TV shows/films that will be released this year

This pandemic will not go on forever. One day we will go back to normal.

I think a lot of the posters who want to go out socialising don't realise how dangerous this is,

And to be fair I was one of them posters until my family members died from covid. Only one had underlying health conditions, the other two were in pretty good health. I wanted things back to normal, I was sick of the restrictions and not being able to see me wider family but losing family to this virus was a massive reality check.

I think a lot of the posters who want to go out socialising don't realise how dangerous this is, haven't had it reach out and touch their lives yet, and believe they are invincible
Have you ever considered that they know the actual risk of impending death and have decided that they're happy to take that chance? Not all of us think we will absolutely definitely die, and the vast majority of us won't.

As for the partners comment, you've just shown how nasty and bitter you are there, haven't you.

@ElliFAntspoo well you don’t sound happy with your lot, why not try and do couch to 5k, it’ll give you something positive and help with your weight. The problem with furlough it gives you all the time in the world to sit and dwell on all the negative news and then to sit and munch all the crap in the cupboard. I’m so grateful I go out to work every day, walking my dogs and seeing to my horse, life doesn’t seem that bad. I find joy in something most days, spring is round the corner, we will be able to have bbq’s in the garden again soon, pubs will open where you can sit outside, it’s not all doom and gloom.

I really don't see the justification in not completly going back to normal once the vulnerable are vaccinated. Yes keep tthe borders closed if you want to prevent variants coming in, but otherwise society needs to go back to normal.

I think in May if nothings changed all the pubs, restaurants, theatres and shops should form a sort of union and all just open up on the same day, the gov't can't fine and close down all of them and it forces the gov'ts hand

This thread seems to be full of people saying, "they have said this" and "they have said that". They have been doing this for nearly a year.

At what point do you wake up and realise patted on the head and told little white lies to keep you placated?

Where abouts along this journey were you ever told the truth?
When they said said you shouldn't wear masks?
When they said it will be gone by the summer?
When they said you could go on holiday to these destinations?
When they said a new app would solve the problem?
When they said local lockdowns would give them greater control in fighting the spread of the virus?
When they said a firebreak lockdown during the October break would ensure you had a carefree Christmas?
When they said locking you down in the run up to Christmas would allow you a week to see your family?
When they told you you'd be locked down until the middle of February?

When will you wake up and realise you are being told what you want to here, not what you need to know?

@Totallycluelessoverhere

Having lost multiple family members to covid I think we need to comply as long as possible. Yea it is difficult. Yes I want my children at school, yes I want some normality and some kind of social life but the pain of losing family members is not comparable.

Totally agree.

@ElliFAntspoo

This thread seems to be full of people saying, "they have said this" and "they have said that". They have been doing this for nearly a year.

At what point do you wake up and realise patted on the head and told little white lies to keep you placated?

Where abouts along this journey were you ever told the truth?
When they said said you shouldn't wear masks?
When they said it will be gone by the summer?
When they said you could go on holiday to these destinations?
When they said a new app would solve the problem?
When they said local lockdowns would give them greater control in fighting the spread of the virus?
When they said a firebreak lockdown during the October break would ensure you had a carefree Christmas?
When they said locking you down in the run up to Christmas would allow you a week to see your family?
When they told you you'd be locked down until the middle of February?

When will you wake up and realise you are being told what you want to here, not what you need to know?

Yeah, newsflash, people do tend to believe the government. Why wouldn't they?

They probably don't now, but had no reason not to initially.

You're starting to sound a bit tin foil hat wearing, you know?

Realistically how and when do you see this ending.

I'm a really disciplined athlete - club/national standard, not international or elite/professional. Anyway I train twice per day (sorry Boris but I'm not reducing to once per day because you want us all at the lowest common denominator), I have no lack of motivation problems and even I'm finding it impossible to keep up my usual standards of fitness.

Its horrible trying to go out training in this constant freezing weather, not to mention almost impossible. I'd normally train in the cheerful environment of my local gym with other likeminded people - can't do that, its banned. I can't go for a swim to soothe my sore muscles from training all week - banned. No competitions for nearly a year now, so no usual socialising after the race but travelling to races is fun and the whole thing means you don't overeat and use up loads of calories, so guess what I'm doing instead? Eating too much. I normally have my holidays in winter and go warm weather training somewhere cheap and sunny, like the Canary Islands or the south of Spain, but can't do that either. Even that 2 weeks soaking up vitamin D does your health so much good.

I've worked full time throughout this, no furlough, go into work in person most days and all I do now is pay tax and go to work and train alone. I can't try and meet a new boyfriend - dating is banned, unless I take my chances online with one of the many strangers who are using this lockdown as an excuse to suggest coming round to your house for sex, when you don't even know them! No thanks (does anyone ever actually do that?)

Its a miserable existence, and I'd say I'm one of the better equipped people to deal with it - no kids to educate while trying to hold down a job, able to stick to a disciplined routine, no history of depression. And I'm bored out of my mind and planning ways to leave the UK for good if it doesn't get this issue of continual lockdown resolved soon.

@CoronaIsWatching

I really don't see the justification in not completly going back to normal once the vulnerable are vaccinated. Yes keep tthe borders closed if you want to prevent variants coming in, but otherwise society needs to go back to normal.

I think in May if nothings changed all the pubs, restaurants, theatres and shops should form a sort of union and all just open up on the same day, the gov't can't fine and close down all of them and it forces the gov'ts hand

I think in May if nothings changed all the pubs, restaurants, theatres and shops should form a sort of union and all just open up on the same day, the gov't can't fine and close down all of them and it forces the gov'ts hand

I wouldn't bet on it. They just pull all the licenses. That moves selling alcohol in a pub from a civil infraction to a criminal offence, and no pub landlord or business owner wants a criminal offence on their record.

If you are feeling that way I would stop complying to be honest. Your mental health is more important than the risk of covid