Page 9 | My children are fine with being at home...

HecouldLickEm · 05/01/2021 19:46

Last lock down both ecstatic at first, older less and less social, younger ecstatic all through however, they don't realise the lack of social ing on themselves.

Dd with sen did extremely well back in school, the break and 1:1 work did her the world of good.
She seemed more confident over all and made some good friends
However she's very happy to be back at home and is absolutely locked into mine craft with some school pals and they play together on line.

Older dd wasn't live taught last time and this time she's just had a day of full lessons and it was 10000 times better! It's a weight off my mind and she's now engaged and interacting with her peers on line and the teacher she seemed so happy today.(followed the lessons on her phone))
Younger dd will unfortunately spend too much time on a screen but I am will try and make for that at weekends and with other learning. Her primary school isn't going to provide much again which I'm happy about because I have a program for her to build on her core skills.

WhenPidgeonsCry · 05/01/2021 19:55

@herethereandeverywhere

WhenPidgeonsCry or, offering another perspective, maybe it's 'Romanian orphanage syndrome'? No point making an emotional response as no one will respond.

I'm sure you'll find that unlikely and unpleasant. That's exactly how those with kids who are struggling feel reading your comment.

It's not exactly something you can change well we can't change reactions that have already happened no. We can support and offer strategies to manage current and future feelings and responses though. It was that sort of advice and guidance, rather than your halo polishing, that I was seeking out.

I have to say I'd find a 15 yr old girl hanging out with her 12 year old brother unusual. But only because I never hung out with mine and don't know any 15 yr old girls who would have. It is also undoubtedly easier for secondary school kids to feel more comfortable with a move to socialising online and to understand the situation and give it perspective. Mine are year 4 and 6.

I don't have any idea what you're going on about to be honest. You do seem very emotional though, which explains a lot.

Xerochrysum · 05/01/2021 20:06

herethereandeverywhere, your children are in better position than mine. My dc is an only child. So, totally no physical interaction with other children. Though I do wonder that maybe one of the factor he is coping ok since he is used being on his own.

herethereandeverywhere · 05/01/2021 20:09

WhenPidgeonsCry "I don't have any idea what you're going on about to be honest."

Also explains a lot. absence of empathy and understanding.

Cissyandflora · 05/01/2021 20:09

Yes. Mine love it. We are overcrowded. In a tower block. No car. Single parent. The children are happy. I don’t mean to be mean but when I hear about the list childhoods and irreparable damage to education I do think to myself ffs. And also I say it out loud sometimes.

Anonanon12 · 05/01/2021 20:21

2 out of 3 of mine prefer being at home, my most sociable one is the one who prefers being at school.
We have a history of Autism in our family and 1 is diagnosed so I think this is why ours prefer it.
As a child, in particular, a teen, I'd have much preferred to do the work from home, but I would have really missed my friends.
Might be a different story if it was how it was 25 years ago with dodgy Internet, hardly any kids programmes and no Amazon deliveries... Can you imagine 😩😩

ItsAllComingBackToMeNow · 05/01/2021 20:51

My two were very happy during the last lockdown, we are exceptionally lucky to have a garden, lovely toys, a pretty big house where we can all have plenty of space and they are each other’s BFFs, which I am so grateful for. They were so content I was worried about how they’d deal with going back to school, but they were fine with that too. And they’re ok about lockdown again, more sad about their clubs and activities which will have to stop now too.

I am sad for those children who struggle, and their parents too, it must be dreadful.

sortmylifeoutplease · 05/01/2021 20:53

Mine are pleased to be off too.

Carrotcakeforbreakfast · 05/01/2021 21:08

Mine are okay
They could have key worker places but it had a really detrimental effect on my youngest last time. She had no friends there and there wasn't much structure.
She didn't go often just on the days that we couldn't juggle shifts.

They have a normal bedtime.
Alarms set
Breakfast dressed and ready to start the day.

They do miss their friends but catch up with them online. Not ideal but for now it is all we have.

MushMonster · 05/01/2021 21:22

For mine, 12, the novelty of no school wore off quickly months and months ago.
She hates distance learning. She has started to complain that she is not really learning anything. So I am going to teach her some subjects myself.
She is an extrovert, and loves being with her friends.
And if I ask her to come out for a walk with me, I have to drag her out.
Staying at home is not good for her at all.
She is gaining some further independance though. She can make her own toast and tea now. She even likes green tea! And she can warm her own food and make a sandwich. She will make me a tea if I ask for one.
But on the overall, this is affecting her very badly, most for her wellbeing, even more than education.
I am glad though that they will be home for at least 2 weeks (Wales has not confirmed any further yet)

Cantspeakpublic · 05/01/2021 21:40

My two are doing really well at home too so these headlines also annoy me. If I’m really honest and i know it’s not popular to say but with my ds who is at primary I have been in and out of school since he started as he is gifted and the work they set him is way too easy. It’s a nice problem to have so I’m not complaining however with him now being at home we can do older work more as school have refused to give him any.
Socially though I agree he needs his friends and misses football and playtime.
Oh but he doesn’t miss his teacher who shouts very loudly at the class (not great when you have sensory processing disorder)
I think it’s a mixed bag depending on the child’s needs as to whether home schooling is a success or not. And on if the parent can help out. It’s very difficult for all so think we should all be kind to each other and not judge either way 💐

HerRoyalNotness · 05/01/2021 21:53

My 13yo has gone back in person today, first time in 10mths. He was looking forward to it and predicted he would get improved grades being in class. I didn’t like to point out his friend who was also home learning has had straight A’s throughout.

My 10yo is staying home, we drove past his school earlier and I asked if he regretted not going back, he said kind of. But said he likes it at home, he finds it easier to get on with his work (with much prodding) and can concentrate and I think doesn’t get stressed out as he doesn’t have to cope with a full class of distraction. He has some sensory issues. I did thank him for being at home as it lessens the risk for us (I have an underlying condition)

Timona · 05/01/2021 21:54

My Y1 son was over the moon when I told him the schools were closing, but I am one of the parents worrying about the affects of him not going! Not so much education wise, but socially as I have noticed a huge difference in his self confidence. He's an only child and has become so shy and introverted around other children at school and now has no friends at all!
I really worry for him, I have my own issues with social anxiety and have no friends myself and am desperate for him not to turn out like me

HollyGenneroMcClane · 05/01/2021 22:00

My two are fine being at home too. They are excited about home learning. They start their online learning tomorrow with their school. Today they did worksheets, the online activities, joe wicks and reading. They tend to call their friends in the afternoon and play online together. They loved march to summer lockdown last year too. I was working from home last year though and this time i will not be. Dh was furloughed last year and this year he is working from home. But the children have a well-ironed routine so should be fine again.

Billie18 · 05/01/2021 22:40

@HmmSureJan

And were happy they didn't have to go back to school yet. Dd doesn't like the on line work but days it's better than being at school so grins and bears it. Anyone else? I only ask because I see so many threads on here speaking of ruined childhoods and devastated children who have been abandoned to their fate. I just wondered if anyone had children like mine 🤷🏼‍♀️

I would be concerned. It's natural for children to enjoy the company of other children. Do you know why she doesn't like being in school. An extended lock down might be extra damaging for children who don't like or struggle in school. They may find it difficult to return to school and have missed valuable time at school were they would have been able to develop their social skills.

Billie18 · 05/01/2021 22:46

@Timona

My Y1 son was over the moon when I told him the schools were closing, but I am one of the parents worrying about the affects of him not going! Not so much education wise, but socially as I have noticed a huge difference in his self confidence. He's an only child and has become so shy and introverted around other children at school and now has no friends at all! I really worry for him, I have my own issues with social anxiety and have no friends myself and am desperate for him not to turn out like me

I believe parks are open and some sporting clubs and facilities for children. Maybe build in a daily visit to a play park so he could meet other children and find some sporting activity that he could attend regularly? There will be other children about for him and some parents for you to talk to. I know this is far from ideal but it might be helpful

ceeveebee · 05/01/2021 22:56

My two (9 y/o twins) loved it last time round for about a month and then they started to get really ratty with each other. My DD really missed her friends and started having lots of emotional elisodes. This time we have already set up a daily video call with a group of friends so they can keep in touch more. DS on the other hand is totally happy in his own company, although equally happy with friends too, he’s very laid back. He loves being at home.

Original poster

HmmSureJan · 05/01/2021 23:39

I would be concerned. It's natural for children to enjoy the company of other children. Do you know why she doesn't like being in school. An extended lock down might be extra damaging for children who don't like or struggle in school. They may find it difficult to return to school and have missed valuable time at school were they would have been able to develop their social skills.

Dear me, what a doom and gloom filled post to attempt to frighten me round to toeing the MN party line . Plenty of other kids feeling the same way detailed on here. Are you worried about all of them too? And I never said she didn't like being in school, I said she prefers being at home and as I am sure you're aware there's already been one lengthy lockdown, which she happily went back into school after. 100% attendance as it goes plus a creative writing prize and a good behaviour award/badge this term, which she'll wear on her blazer when she does eventually go back. I have no concerns whatsoever. There was a poster on another thread describing how one of her children was screaming like "a wounded animal" after being told she'd not be going back. I'd be far more concerned if my child was reacting like that tbh.

OP posts:

moominmomma1234 · 06/01/2021 06:24

I actually like to read these stories of happy kids in a happy home. It helps me feel less guilty about my child taking a vulnerable place at school due to echp/asd.
It makes me realise how very different our set up at home is. I often daydream about what ‘normal’ family life looks like. I have honestly liked having a nosy into your lives with this post. I can tell you all appreciate how resilient your kids are. Don’t feel bad for sharing

jessstan1 · 06/01/2021 06:29

@HmmSureJan

I would be concerned. It's natural for children to enjoy the company of other children. Do you know why she doesn't like being in school. An extended lock down might be extra damaging for children who don't like or struggle in school. They may find it difficult to return to school and have missed valuable time at school were they would have been able to develop their social skills.

Dear me, what a doom and gloom filled post to attempt to frighten me round to toeing the MN party line . Plenty of other kids feeling the same way detailed on here. Are you worried about all of them too? And I never said she didn't like being in school, I said she prefers being at home and as I am sure you're aware there's already been one lengthy lockdown, which she happily went back into school after. 100% attendance as it goes plus a creative writing prize and a good behaviour award/badge this term, which she'll wear on her blazer when she does eventually go back. I have no concerns whatsoever. There was a poster on another thread describing how one of her children was screaming like "a wounded animal" after being told she'd not be going back. I'd be far more concerned if my child was reacting like that tbh.

So would I, HmmSureJan. It's great to read that many realise there is more to life than school, it isn't the only way to be educated.

CarlottaValdez · 06/01/2021 06:56

DS (6) is fine with it but like a PP I think it’s not great for him as he’s naturally quite introverted but was doing really well at school. He’ll also be missing his after school football and his drama group on a Saturday (although that’s online now at least).

Ding123 · 06/01/2021 06:57

My yr 3 and yr 6 dc love being at home, and literally whooped with joy at the news of schools closing again. We don't have a garden so the lack of outdoor space and staying cooped up inside concerns me. There have been days when they drove me crazy with their bickering and repeated exclamations of how bored they are (the minute I get them off devices), but (their words), they're happy to be sat doing nothing and be bored than go to school. They have friends, are doing academically well, rarely moan when they do attend school so I don't get it. I'm relieved, but I don't get it.

First lockdown DC1 developed terrible anxiety and DC2 went feral. So the way I see it they may WANT to stay at home but it isn't necessarily good for them!

Juanbablo · 06/01/2021 06:59

Mine all like being at home but miss their friends. And they find home school harder because it's difficult to concentrate at home with all the distractions like the dog, sibling with SEN disrupting things, toys, daddy.

Foghead · 06/01/2021 07:45

@Sup1979

Would I be wrong to presume your children -

Aren’t sporty and / or
Not particularly academic and / or
And not especially happy at their school?

My two are “chin up” about them situation BUT would absolutely be delighted if school was back on because love school, lots of friends, highly sporty and academic

You’re wrong there. Mine are sporty and do very well at school. They have lots of friends. They’ve adapted and found different ways to be sporty, they’re in contact with friends and complete all their work, and more. I think the biggest thing for them is they’re night owls and love that they can get up later and not have to rush to get out of the house.

ThornAmongstRoses · 06/01/2021 07:56

My almost 7 year old is delighted!!!

We are very fortunate that we can accommodate home learning, of which he does 5 “topics” a day:

English
Maths
Reads twice
Science
Hand writing practice.

We do about 3 hours a day and thankfully my son is happy to do it.

He isn’t too fussed about not seeing his friends in the physical sense (we will be doing group Zoom sessions with them) because he’s got his younger brother at home with him so he’s always got someone to play with.

Me and my husband are both key workers but we haven’t taken up a place in the school because we are aware there are children who need a space much more than we do and we wouldn’t feel comfortable taking it up unnecessarily and denying the space to a family who may need it.