Why can't people see that it is stupid to mix at Christmas?

[MagicSummer]

I know that the Government had to relax the rules for the 5-day period because so many people would have broken them anyway, but can people not see that mixing families, travelling and close contact is going to cause another spike in the New Year? It makes me so cross - why can't people just knuckle down and have a quiet Christmas this year without endangering the lives of their older relatives?

Because we've had enough.

Because our mental health is at breaking point.

Because we are lonely.

Because we need more to life than this.

My mum had a fucking awful, painful, lonely and degrading death from cancer during the first lockdown. No friends or wider family to support her or say goodbye to, or bring a little bit of closure to her. No OT or anyone assessing her because of covid, Didn't get the personal carers coming into the house because of covid, didn't even get a fucking biopsy due to covid.

So if I choose to have a life in the way I think is safest with other consenting adults that is MY business not yours. Covid does not give you the right to judge me and my actions. I'm damned if I'm going to be lonely and in despair over Xmas because you want me too stay locked up at home without family to support me.

@MrsAmaretto

Because we've had enough.

Because our mental health is at breaking point.

Because we are lonely.

Because we need more to life than this.

My mum had a fucking awful, painful, lonely and degrading death from cancer during the first lockdown. No friends or wider family to support her or say goodbye to, or bring a little bit of closure to her. No OT or anyone assessing her because of covid, Didn't get the personal carers coming into the house because of covid, didn't even get a fucking biopsy due to covid.

So if I choose to have a life in the way I think is safest with other consenting adults that is MY business not yours. Covid does not give you the right to judge me and my actions. I'm damned if I'm going to be lonely and in despair over Xmas because you want me too stay locked up at home without family to support me.

Well said. And my condolences on losing your DM.

I agree with the principle of what you are saying op. Mixing is clearly riskier than not mixing. Some people will mix, rules or no rules - that’s just how some people are. We are not mixing - zoom calls all the way. I’ve had Christmas on my own in previous years (this year my now boyfriend and I are together - alone, no family will be visiting) - it’s not ideal, nor is it what I would choose, but the sky won’t fall in.

@MrsAmaretto

Because my parents and in laws are in our childcare bubble and have DS every week. I can’t see how different it is me and DH are there too.

Because I haven't seen my mum and dad year at all even thought they are local.

Because both have had cancer and shielded and mums is terminal.

Because some of us are sensible anyway and are more than capable of isolating beforehand so we can safely spend a family Christmas together knowing s it's likely the last.

I've been at work throughout as keyworker. I feel for those who have lost jobs and family members.

But the honest point people keep missing is those W who won't be sensible and limit risk would have done what they wanted anyway and have probability done what they wanted all the way through.

Have faith in enough if the population to be as careful as possible.

We’re not seeing older relatives, we’re seeing our siblings. We will socially distance and keep the rooms ventilated, but we’re making a sensible, risk based judgement. None of us are high risk, why shouldn’t we see each other?

Let's all hide under a blanket and hibernate.

@Lunar567

Let's all hide under a blanket and hibernate.

Personally I'd rather we'd taken successful containment measures. Like Australia, New Zealand, the Isle of Man, Singapore, Hong Kong, Japan, Taiwan, Vietnam, and many other sensible countries.

But then, I wanted a return to largely normal. It appears that many of my fellow Brits prefer to drag it out (and hold views on the vulnerable - at least 20% of the population - worryingly close to fascist eugenics).

@Lunar567

Let's all hide under a blanket and hibernate.

In many ways this is the best thing to do til the vaccine arrives!

Tbh I'm considering pulling my 5 year old out of school from now until March. I'd rather he saw family than went to school.

I agree with @SheepandCow though, we shouldn't be in this situation, Johnson has a lot to rue

And yet we are in this situation, and no not all of us mixing with family at Christmas believe in "fascist eugenics"

Surely it depends on circumstances. For all kinds of reasons it might be awful for people not to see their family. For example one friend of mine has a terminally ill father and this will almost certainly be his last Christmas whether they see him or not. It may be difficult for people with a nuclear family to imagine, but Christmas alone would be traumatic for lots of others.

In our case, we will isolate for 10 days before my family visit so that we do not put them at risk. After they leave there is another 10 days before my children will go back to nursery. I work from home. So I don't think we are doing anything irresponsible. If our circumstances were different then I'd make different decisions.

Many of the countries who have managed well during the pandemic have treated their citizens as adults. Relative risks have been clearly communicated in a consistent way and there has been some leniency for people to make judgements based on that. This works much better than arbitrary, ever changing rules that most people stop obeying because they make no logical sense.

We are away for Xmas as planned with PIL and Bro and SIL. We have all decided we still all want too rather than cancel

Because a lot of older relatives won't be here next year? Naturally, before you start banging on feverishly about " Covid"

I wish they hadn't relaxed the rules its so stupid

I agree that the best thing to do this year is to celebrate in your own households/support bubbles. I think the government have been quite frankly spineless, and have made rules based around what they think people would reasonably be wanting to do anyway - so that way, it looks like people are following their guidance, when in fact the people who do choose to mix probably would have done so even if we were in 'lockdown'.

So, the people who do mix aren't doing anything wrong, because the government have written it into their rules, to fabricate an image of compliance.

However, what I do hate seeing is people saying 'I don't mind the risk! I just want to see my family!' I get that, I really get that, but the problem is that if EVERYONE takes that attitude, and there is a big wave early in the new year, your loved ones who were willing to take that risk might not be able to get the care they need due to the NHS being overwhelmed. It's not all a case of 'I'll take my chances'. By doing so, you might be putting others at risk who then couldn't get the treatment they need through the NHS, not just for covid, but for lots of other conditions that have had to be shoved to one side.

This is one year. We can have a get together when the vulnerable have been vaccinated. Now is not that time.

It's so close, we've kept everyone safe for SO long. Why waste that now, by doing this?

I just don't understand.

@user1471562688

Because a lot of older relatives won't be here next year? Naturally, before you start banging on feverishly about " Covid"

Certainly won't be if they catch covid at Christmas.

@user1471562688

Because a lot of older relatives won't be here next year? Naturally, before you start banging on feverishly about " Covid"

Yep. Covid will see to that. Likely give them a fever before they die too.

Because some of us have rigidly stuck to the rules the whole time since March, and there's nothing to say that we can't meet up with another couple of households to make up three over Christmas.
I'm sticking to the rules, but I'll be going over to my parents at Christmas because I'm allowed and I'm sensible.
I can't get worked up over what others are or aren't doing too much, that way lies misery.
Just do you.

I just don't understand.

Really? You don't understand? Despite having read every post on this thread, you don't understand.

Don't buy it sorry.

Now I see why we still have such a high rate of drink driving including repeat offenders. They were told to "just do you".