Christmas poll

[Thorilicious]

We as a family have decided that, regardless of what the government allows mixing wise at Christmas, we aren't spending Christmas with anyone else. We will pop over to my parents, and have a chat through the window, but that's it. DH and I are both key workers, so don't want to risk spreading the virus for the sake of one get together.
Will you mix if they say it's allowed?
Yes-I'm seeing my family if it's allowed
No-We aren't mixing.
No arguments from me either way, just curious what everyone else is thinking.

As @Bimbleboo said, we were prepared to skip the gathering and stay home but with BoJo saying it's fine to mix it's stirred things up and made it harder to argue.

[quote Calmandmeasured1]**@Jenasaurus

Can you say which area of the SE, I live in the SE and genuinely interested, we were tier 1 before this lockdown but number were starting to climb, I am near Gatwick, keen to know if the higher cases are near me.
This shows you which areas have rising or falling rates:
www.covidmessenger.com/coronavirusliveupdate/

The following one is good too as you can enter your post code and restrict area to, say, within one mile of it, to find out the number of positive cases each day, for the week and the previous week. Also shows 111 triaged cases. It is a few days behind but very good:
digital.nhs.uk/dashboards/coronavirus-in-your-area[/quote]
That is a good site

I’m in a busy SE town

9939 people
18 cases
0 111 triaged cases

No. We normally host my family on boxing day but not this year. If allowed, we will meet them somewhere for a walk outdoors.

My Mum is high risk but lives in a tier 2 area (Scotland) but with very low chance of exposure. We are 2 hours away in a tier 4 area with DC in school and nursery. She has had enough and would mix without a second thought, but I couldn't live with myself if she caught it from us. She's only in her 50s so we hopefully have many more Christmases together.

This article definitely cemented my view that 11 people in our house is too much risk for everyone, whether its allowed or not. I'm upset at the potential for more restrictions in January as a result of Christmas.

english.elpais.com/society/2020-10-28/a-room-a-bar-and-a-class-how-the-coronavirus-is-spread-through-the-air.html

I don’t think it was the wrong decision. Of course if the situation changes the decision can be changed.

My only intention posting was to show how difficult these decisions can be. I wouldn’t blame anyone in the same situation who chose differently.

There are no good choices.

It’s so easy to ‘solve’ other people’s problems across the internet as we only see a simplified version of the problem. Off the top of my head, here are some of the other factors:

• her 2 DC (in their 70s themselves) and most of her other GC are very against her coming. It will cause a family rift and my PIL would never forgive us if she caught it from us. They have used emotive phrases like “killing her” to the DC
• she has chronic pain (hips) and struggles with pain on the 90 minute car journey to ours. We usually make a day of it, stopping off for lots of tea breaks and walking around garden centres etc. She struggles with being cold (arthritis) and uses a walking frame so stopping off options are limited. It’s not a case of quickly stretching her legs, she needs long breaks to wait for the pain to get down to a tolerable level. I’m sure there is a way to make the journey, but realistically it’s either going to be painful or risky.
• she needs help with personal care, which I’m prepared to give (and have done in the past), but her needs are greater than last time we saw her and I’m a bit worried (not a COVID one, but as I said, it’s a complex and tangled situation)
• on the one hand, she’d rather die than live like this, on the other she refused a space in the care home she usually visits for day care because she was (understandably) scared of catching covid
• there is a vaccine on the horizon now. This is the biggest one for me and DH, as there is every chance she could visit safely soon after Christmas.

On the other hand she’s an adult who has seen lots of friends and family die, so understands what death is and should be able to make her own decisions.

Yes

No. We won't mix even if the rules are relaxed. My elderly mother is already in our bubble so we will see her but no one outside our household.

It will be very hard as 22 year old ds lives 100 miles away with his g/f and I had assumed they would be together at Christmas but she is going to her family for 2 weeks so ds will be by himself. If he came to us my mum wouldn't come and would then be on her own.

However, it is only one year, he will survive. I keep thinking that 80 years ago children as young as 5 were evacuated all over the country and didn't see their parents at Christmas. 80 years ago my son would have been fighting abroad somewhere. It puts it in perspective

No

It's unlikely. It would only be my parents and us but they're 75+, I'm ECV and the dc are in two different schools.
I think we'll use tech to get us 'together' this year.

It should be my family this year, but that involves travel and too many households, so we'll see DH's family if local case levels are low enough. If allowed, BIL and family; low but similar exposure/ risk each and they live nearby. If cases are low enough then PIL too (also local), otherwise we'll all see them outside.

Other cold, flu and norovirus have similar survival rates and affect similar members of the family in a negative way depending on their age and health conditions. Therefore, just like all the Christmas's before, as long as everyone is well we will be making our own sensible decisions and meeting up as normal. As far as I’m concerned the government does not get to tell me that I can’t see my own parents or brothers and sisters any longer. It is so very damaging mentally and I despise what this pandemic has done to my DMIL. Usually a very sprightly 70+ lady who is hardly ever home, travelling all over the U.K. and Northern Europe visiting family and friends and attending her local gym upwards of 3 times per week is now terrified to leave her home and very weary of seeing her DC and DGC despite having not seen one side since before March and our side since July for one brief day outside.

We will have family over. Regardless of the rules. There is no risk to us

Are you the only family in the world that have immunity was? How is it there is no risk whatsoever? Genuinely interested!

We will definitely be seeing our adult children and our grandchildren for christmas day. People's decisions will obviously be dependent on who they have living at home with them. We don't have any elderly family members at 59 & 60 my OH and I are the oldest generation in our family and we are both fit and well.

My youngest daughter lives alone so is in a support bubble with us and we do childcare for my eldest daughter and 2 grandchildren so we have regular contact with both of them anyway. Hopefully my son and his OH will be able to get to us too for christmas and we will spend the day all together. We won't be doing any other socialising though. We have already cancelled our planned New Year break in Scotland.

No. We don't want this to be "the year we killed the oldies"
They live the other side of the country and the roads will be rammed.

I think I'll do a bit of Christmas shopping this week (food is already booked) and send a few more cards than usual and then leave everybody to get on with their panic-buying.

Yes, if its allowed. We won't be having our usual Boxing day get together as normal with loads of family, but will be self isolating on the run up so we can see my daughters/ grandkids.

That NHS site is really good. Calmandmeasured1 (and it really shows what happened in the weeks after the students started arriving in mid-September).

My disabled mum is in our bubble so will stay with us as normal.

We cannot see anyone else if the same 3 households only can meet. One set of in laws will bubble with their in laws which will be 2 households then them. The other set are over 500 miles away.

Covid does not know what day it is. It won't give people a break:(

@Nonamesavail

Covid does not know what day it is. It won't give people a break:(

No but did you follow that logic last year with regard to flu?

Much much more common that covid.
And also can be deadly to the vulnerable

Nope but many of the family had flu jabs

@Nonamesavail

Nope but many of the family had flu jabs

So did my dad but it didn't stop him dying from complications of seasonal flu.

More people are dying from covid than flu!

Covid is now the third biggest killer in the UK - not flu. If you take away dementia (from old age) and heart disease this is the most likely way you will die if you are old/vulnerable/at risk.

news.sky.com/story/covid-19-coronavirus-was-third-most-common-cause-of-death-for-october-having-not-been-in-top-10-the-month-before-12136147

Any one else, now it's been officially announced?