Can I visit DD?

[MirandaGoshawk]

Dd moved 150 miles away in August to start a new job. She has just been furloughed. So she isn't seeing anyone apart from her housemate, who is still working, and says she needs warm clothes from home. It's her birthday next week and she sounds pretty down. DH & I could drive there & back in a day but we can't find info about whether or not we're allowed to. Does anyone know?

Assuming both in England, you or your DH could meet her outside in a public place, but not together.

There is no specific restriction about how far you can travel.

So yes, legally, you can take some warm clothes and have a meet up, as long as it's outdoors in a public place and your DH takes some separate recreation or exercise at the same time.

One of you could meet her outside but not both, and not allowed inside. I think most of us are feeling a bit down at the moment and could use a family visit but it’s illegal, unless there are actual care needs. Unfortunately we all just have get through it best we can, at least she has her housemate for company.

I think its quite clear tbh

You can met her, one at a time, outside.

Can she move home whilst she's furloughed?

The rules are very clear and on the government and news websites not sure why you couldn’t find the information

The rules are very clear and easy to find, I think some people just try to find any justification to get round them.

I would just go

You can't move while furloughed because in theory you have to be available to work at a moment's notice.

Thanks for explaining it to me. DH doesn't think the rules are clear, about distance, for example. I have brain fog from having Covid so I couldn't get my head round it. We'll go, take her bike/warm clothes and see her socially distanced :) Thank you.

I think she would see coming back home as a failure, tbh.

Yes, it is rubbish but sadly illegal. Unless you are genuinely concerned for her mental health (being a bit down is different, I think we are all a bit down)
I am not sure on the legalities about how far we can travel, I imagine 150 miles is too far?

Before I get flamed, I haven't got the virus anymore and have tested negative.

Why can’t you post the clothes or she order more?

The rules are clear. Even outside you can only meet with one other person for exercise.

Exactly, Hugo, if no precise distances are given, how far is "too far"?

Just use a courier and send them, will be cheaper than driving 150 miles and no law breaking.

All non essential journeys are banned with exceptions including exercise.this wouldn’t be classed as an essential journey, you also cannot both meet your dad at the same time so even if you did travel only one of you should go really.

Omg just go and see her. Don’t listen to these people in Mumsnet. She sounds like she could be about to fall into a mental health crisis and just needs her parents

This from gov. Website.

The rules are clear. Even outside you can only meet with one other person for exercise

No, any open air recreation is allowed, it is not just exercise.

One of the exceptions allowing you to travel is open air recreation with one other person it doesn't matter that it's not "essential". Open air recreation is exactly what meeting your daughter for a chat is - and the reason it's allowed is because it carries almost no risk in causing excessive spread of the virus, and provides important benefits to the health and compliance of individuals.

If you feel it really is an essential trip then only one of you should go as you're not both allowed to meet her.

I think you should do it too

@guitarstringseadgbe feeling w bit down is not falling into a mental health crisis. Everyone is feeling down. If she was actually mentally ill then yes of course she should go and visit!

Thing is, there is quite an easy transition from feeling down to mentally ill. There isn't really a clear binary thing of "actually mentally ill" or not.

If it was one of my children I’d be there to see them in a heartbeat.

Shoot me.

I'd be going regardless.