To be furious with husband

[YukoandHiro]

Husband has bad asthma. A few days ago he started coughing more regularly. He refused to get a test as he's not been out much at all and said it's just his seasonal asthma playing up.
Tonight the cough is very bad so I've booked a test for him in the morning. He's going to take it but he's so angry with me - he says I'm treating him like a child and don't trust him to look after his own health. But we have a 3yo in nursery and we also have a three week old baby. We need the test result to protect THEM (especially the newborn).
We are both so angry with each other and now in this bloody pressure cooker as we have to stay in til he gets his results.
Gah. This year absolutely sucks!

@ancientgran Not going out is a big one. Until the day before yesterday husband had been doing all our errands etc. So we need to book deliveries blah blah blah.
We're also in a childcare bubble with my mum (late 60s) for elder child so she needs to know the result too. And I would call the GP to discuss the cold that the newborn has - I'd assumed she'd just caught it off the 3yo (who tested negative 1.5 weeks ago when her symptoms arose, so we could send her back to nursery), but I'd want more advice if I knew we had covid in the house.

Also I'd probably get a private test for me and the newborns even without symptoms to see if either of us had been exposed

YANBU! And he should have booked it himself if coughing a lot. Even if asthmatic / he's been coughing more than usual, during a pandemic where coughing is a key symptom.
Of course he needs a test. Preferably before infecting anyone else.

Most people with kids are going to have them tested several times this winter. It’s just how it goes.

Really? So you are going to have your children tested multiple times if they so much as cough the wrong way?

Our youngest barks is head off during winter, he'll more than likely be no different this year. He isn't going to be wheeled in for a test every time that happens.

You did the right thing.

But surely people aren't expected to get a test every time their cough/asthma etc flares up
No they're not. The NHS states to be tested if it's worse than usual.

This is one of those situations where strangers on Mumsnet decide that they know other people's long term health conditions better than those who live with them for years and then deliberately speak about people with 'just a cold' or 'man flu' or are convinced it is just sinusitis etc with those living with a chronic respiratory condition.

**This is one of those situations where strangers on Mumsnet decide that they know other people's long term health conditions better than those who live with them for years and then deliberately speak about people with 'just a cold' or 'man flu' or are convinced it is just sinusitis etc and those living with a chronic respiratory condition like they're the same thing.
(Knocked post too soon)

It takes 30 seconds to actually do. I was fairly certain my asthma was playing up a few weeks ago but booked a test after I’d spent literally 3 solid hours coughing.

Figured it was better to be safe than sorry 🤷🏼‍♀️

Bubblemonkey
I've also done several tests when my asthma has been worse than normal and it's met the criteria. Like you I thought it was the right thing to do.

I'd still have been annoyed if DH took it upon himself to decide he knows my body more than me and booked me what is a medical procedure (and one that also limits my movements in law prior to getting results).

@PhilCornwall1 Does your youngest go to nursery or school? Because if they're "barking" they can't go without a test result. We've already had the 3yo tested twice in 6 weeks because nursery won't accept anyone with a cough without the paperwork. School will be the same.

• @PhilCornwall1 Does your youngest go to nursery or school? Because if they're "barking" they can't go without a test result. We've already had the 3yo tested twice in 6 weeks because nursery won't accept anyone with a cough without the paperwork. School will be the same.*

Yes, the youngest does go to school. He's like it every year, due to enlarged tonsils.

When it happens this year they will send him home and refuse reentry til a test is done. It's annoying but inevitable

I wouldn't book a test for someone else, regardless.

We've already had the 3yo tested twice in 6 weeks because nursery won't accept anyone with a cough without the paperwork. School will be the same.

4 year old hasn't been tested. Had a slight cough for a bit when the weather changed as she always does. School were fine with it.

@YukoandHiro

When it happens this year they will send him home and refuse reentry til a test is done. It's annoying but inevitable

They haven't yet.

I won’t forget your user name op

You’re the person you started the “A PLEA” thread and it really says all I need to know about your stance on corona. So I’m with your husband!!

* Please, if you have a garden or any alternative, do not go out and use parks etc*.

My husband and I live in a damp, dark two bedroom flat with no outside space with a 2.5 year old.

A no outside exercise edict Will drive us to completely mental breakdown.

Stop being selfish and think of the people who really actually need to leave the their property to keep their child well.

It's only the start of winter and people are already 'oh god are you going to test EVERY time you have a symptom' this is why its spreading, because people think its just a cold, or usual cough etc and then go to work or send their kids to school. I wouldn't have booked a test for your DH but I'd be really unimpressed with his attitude and it would make me think less of him.

I do appreciate its a pain, I have a child in nursery and have had him off pending tests twice in the last month while the whole family self isolated. Its impacted work and people have commented but at the end of the day I don't want to be the one who turns up and spreads it to the rest of the workplace because my child just gets colds around this time. It's bloody selfish.

@Jroseforever Fair enough, but that previous post says more about my attitude to this government's ability to handle it - felt sure a Spain-style indoor only lockdown was coming. And now we've got another lockdown. Which as Sunak basically admitted yesterday will last til March.
People not getting tested adds to it, yes.

@Jroseforever also, "I won't forget your username" is a bit unnecessarily sinister. What's got your goat today?

Because I found your previous thread so narrow minded with what you were suggesting

It stayed with me.

And no

Your precious thread clearly wasn’t aimed at gov

It was aimed at anyone with a garden using any outside space that wasn’t their own garden.

Your baby will be fine. There's very little evidence of babies of young children becoming unwell from covid. My DH would be angry too if I did this. I wouldn't have done it. I'd have told him to do it but not rang on his behalf. I can see why you did it though.

YukoandHiro
They don't sound sinister. They sound like someone who has remembered a thread because the poster (in this case you) were ridiculously telling people they should not go outside because you need to go outside more.

I didn't see your other thread, but it does put the fact you decided to ignore your husband's right to make his own medical decisions into perspective.

Leave that man alone. It's his body, his health, his decision.

But her health and that of her children may be affected by his decision so I think it is her business too.