What a shit time to be alive

[Mylittlesandwich]

I know we're all supposed to be keeping upbeat and accepting the new normal but it's bollocks.

Obviously we're all being screwed in different and inventive ways, personally I had DS in November by the time I'd fought through my PND cloud and felt up to facing people we were in lockdown.
We had planned our budget for mat leave perfectly. Then DH was furloughed.
We had scraped through lockdown and he was back at work when the Scottish circuit breaker popped up and he was let go.
We are so skint it's unreal. I'm working from what should have been a nursery as many hours as I can get my hands on to try and keep us afloat and I can't even spend a couple of hours at my mums to re-charge.
Feel free to add the ways covid has screwed you over.

You're right its utterly shit.
I won't try and cheer you up as its venting time but I'm trying to still keep positive overall.
Even though I'm in Ireland and we all got put under level 5 lockdown again this eve.
Fuck it anyway.

6 weeks the Taoiseach said! Basically to ensure we can have some sort of Christmas.

It's like Cromwell all over again

Its desperately sad .

I never imagined id see anything like this .

We are gradually losing our freedom . My family is sacred is to me and not being able to sit with them , just being with them on the sofa and watching a movie together or pottering out to the garden centre , makes my heart hurt .

Everything feel so surreal. Just keeping my sanity by being positive.

I had my rainbow baby in July after battling infertility for three years. I have OCD and covid would have been hard for me anyway, but being a new mum and the weird emotions that fall out from the journey it has taken to get here makes it all so much harder. I'm having to face up to the fact that even though I love and am in awe of my baby, I'm clinically depressed and have raging anxiety. The world feels like a scary place to me right now anyway, let alone with even more uncertainty creeping back in about the future. I spend my days worrying about my baby, worrying about going back to work, worrying about my inability to cope generally, worrying about the lack of support from HVs, worrying about losing the little mental health support I have, worrying about my baby getting covid, worrying about whether I should force myself to go and get a coffee from a coffee shop so I don't turn into a recluse, whilst also worrying whether that makes me the worst mum in the world for taking my baby on an unnecessary trip out. DD is 14 weeks and I've got her newborn check and my postnatal check this week, and I'm worrying they will get cancelled again too

6 weeks the Taoiseach said! Basically to ensure we can have some sort of Christmas.
It's the most haphazard ill thought out crap I've ever heard of. Ever. Wait until they have a burst of cases 3rd week in December because all of Ireland are out shopping:( And I know something has to be done but they hadn't given any leadership to properly steer the ship

Yep it's shit. I'm mostly positive and I've very grateful that I've had a better time of it than most - financially secure, garden, enjoy outdoor hobbies.

But my relationship with DP is rocky, we can't tell if we're wrong for each other or if its just the stress of lockdown, and I'm terrified of having to face the winter alone, coming to terms with a breakup, in a hard lockdown. I don't entirely trust that the government will keep the support bubbles, and even if they do, my closest friends are already in bubbles with other people.

Constant working from home has destroyed my motivation and enthusiasm for my job, I just want to actually be in a room with my colleagues.

to all of you

I hear you!

DH and I were both put on furlough back in March, we will be unemployed by the end of the month when furlough runs out.
We have been looking for work since we both of us have been served notice... but there are not many jobs around the majority is some physical shift work on min wage in a warehouse. We are both over qualified & luck experience - that was some feedback we got from interview!
We have never been unemployed or able to provide for DC. It's depressing. Especially as we will not be the only family that will be left without jobs or other meaningful income thanks to corona!
I really would like the government to step in with a special hardship payment for homeowners that lost jobs due to corona. Otherwise the queue for social housing will be tenfold in 6 months time...

It is all so sad.

I am not working my husband has worked everyday apart from 4 days since lockdown .. as he is so concerned that he needs to keep his business afloat.

I have not done hardly any exercise.

I am exhausted with the kids, one of children has severe covid anxiety. But I keep telling myself we have some income.

But I feel so sorry for those of you who have your babies and so sorry for those of you who have lost your employment.

It is all just so horrible.

Wishing you all a better road ahead.

@EnglishRain you sound like a lovely mum living through an incredibly hard time. Your love for your DD shines through your post

I've had OCD in the past. I know it doesn't work for everyone but for me cognitive behaviour therapy was really helpful. If waiting lists are long, there are some online CBT courses.

I don't know how new mums can cope.

englishrain I wish you were my neigbour and I could invite you over for a chat.

Please message some friends.

Even work colleagues.

Can you call a GP?

Can you call your hospital to be put in touch with baby groups or chuck a message out in Mumsnet - for a zoom meet up with other Mums.

@EnglishRain I absolutely do not know how you are coping. I had crippling anxiety when DS was born. My mum came to see me one day and asked if I was ok and I had a complete breakdown. I just "knew" something terrible was going to happen to DS and the only way to stop it was to watch him 24/7. He was also a rainbow baby.
Please call someone I'm on high dose antidepressants and while they clearly don't stop me from being awake in the middle of the night worrying about how on earth we're going to continue to pay the mortgage they are a big help.

@zeebree

I don't know how new mums can cope.

englishrain I wish you were my neigbour and I could invite you over for a chat.

Please message some friends.

Even work colleagues.

Can you call a GP?

Can you call your hospital to be put in touch with baby groups or chuck a message out in Mumsnet - for a zoom meet up with other Mums.

My friend is a new mum , baby born in June. She is literally out doing stuff every day, baby groups, sensory groups, swim class etc.

@Babyroobs I think it depends on your area. Where I am nothing is open, socially distanced or otherwise and you're only allowed to go to anything if your child is under 1. That gives DS and me a month exactly.

Plus if the PP is anxious about the virus going out and about to anything and everything is unlikely to help.

Definitely everyone of my children are struggling for different reasons..they are all adults 20 to 27 but they are all going to come home by Christmas. They are all at Uni or post grads from decent Unis but cannot now be self sufficient..it is bloody heartbreaking!! Englishrain where in the uk are you living? I am very happy to help you 💕💕

It is shit. But it's only shit compared to what we know and love. Quite frankly we've been spoilt the last 70 years. No wars, no famine, no natural disasters, no disease til now..
I'm not downplaying how you feel op. I'm the same, pnd, anxiety off the scale, a 2yo and 1yo and no where to go but I just try to remind myself that in all of human history we've never had it so good and that it will be over eventually.

I don't know Banana0Pancakes... Yes obviously terrible things have happened in the past. More terrible than this.

But there's something uniquely shit about not being able to hug your loved ones or friends, to be isolated or separated. Adversity makes you want to bond tighter with those around you. Just being together gives strength. But in spite of our best efforts at zoom quizzes, this crisis cuts apart.

It's fucking shit you're right.

And we're not even in dire straights!

Its shit.
DH got the call yesterday to say he's being made redundant. We expected it but still
I'm a SAHM we have 3 kids, the youngest of which has a life limiting disease so we've shielded and had to be so careful.

@Lofari I hope things work out for you.

I'm not coping that well with all this. I have germaphobia which doesn't work well with a pandemic. My hands are so sore from constant washing and cleaning. My 4 DC go to 4 different education settings and DH goes to work on a shift system and I have a PT job, not to mention a couple of clubs/tutoring things which makes our contacts huge as a family. We are on our second self isolation as DD2 had symptoms a couple of weeks ago and today someone in my bubble at work came down with it so I'm in for 2 weeks.

DD1 has just left school. She missed out on her GCSE's and just missed out on going to the college she wanted to so is now at one miles away. She missed her leavers events and prom (dress still sat unworn in her wardrobe). She's fed up as this should be the time she starts living it up.

DS1 has SN and has developed what I think is OCD. Visiting the doctors next week.

DS2 and DD2 aren't suffering quite so bad although DD2 is going to school next September and I really wanted this year to spend some time exploring stuff with her. She'll be ready to go to school once this all ends. She's my last baby.

Everything I do to keep sane is being banned and I'm just done.

Jaysus misery loves company. It's not a shite time to be alive at all.

Stop it, Readandwalk, theres people on this thread who have hard situations, pandemic or not.
And pandemic making things worse.

I know so have I but a misery fest ain't helping. And it's not a shite time to be alive statistically, it's not.